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Anyone else just ready to give up?


AndyTravis

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On bass/bands/gigging etc.

 

I was just mindlessly scrolling through “bass guitar” search on eBay.

 

And the wife said…”oops, is that a box turning up next week?”

 

My response (without much thought) was “nah, no point - sort of given up now haven’t I?”

 

And that didn’t make me feel sad or anything, it just came out and it was a realisation that I have a couple of basses, no amp, no band, no desire to gig…I’ve played for the sum total of time it took me to d*ck about for the composition challenge this month - and the same last month.

 

I’m so lazy with my playing, I don’t do it for enjoyment anymore and I have no aspiration to do any playing - sort of a blanket writers block, but for bass playing.

 

No plans to sell up what’s left, but I haven’t bought anything new for about 8 months which if you know anything about me…has to be a record.

 

Just wondering if there are just people who’ve hit the same wall - I’m sure it’s been covered before.

 

I spend more time floating around bass websites than I do with playing.

 

I suppose a few recent projects falling flat has eased me into this state of “meh”.

 

 

Edited by AndyTravis
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Yes to a number of your comments. I have hit that wall several times over the last 40 years of playing. Sometimes its down to me getting frustrated with my playing / progress, sometimes the music or gigs, whats happening with my life and sometimes my fellow musicians :shok: I can fully understand the demoralising effect of projects falling flat and having a negative effect. I've gone through similar and thought why bother and then the next band puts a smile back on my face. 😁

 

As far a equipment is concerned my turnover of basses (or other equipment) has subsided (not stopped of course) as I've tried many different ones and can pretty much look at a bass / specs and rule many out. This is not 100% accurate but due to the experience I've gained is usually pretty close and has saved me a lot of money 🤣 I still "bass chase" but the number of times it turns into an actual purchase are now very reduced. Maybe your desire to buy gear has been sated through your experiences. You know "got the tshirt" and all that.

 

Sounds like you have a supportive partner and I would say that if its financially sensible, hold onto your gear for the moment. Don't force getting back playing and take a bit of a break. Who knows in 6 months the desire might be back 👍

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4 hours ago, AndyTravis said:

 

Just wondering if there are just people who’ve hit the same wall - I’m sure it’s been covered before.

I retired from gigging five years ago and have less than zero desire to ever start again, at least on bass. But I still enjoy playing a weekly local jam, sometimes on bass, sometimes on other instruments. Frankly, I miss mixing live shows more than playing out, as I typically made better money and worked with much better bands  on that side of the room.

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I formed a blues band nearly 2 years ago with the intention of ensuring I play maybe 18 gigs a year for the next few years. That is the minimum that will keep me motivated, practising and keeping my core basses.

 

I am nearly 68 and know my present good health won’t last indefinitely. The recent passing of my great pals @bumnote and @yorks5stringer has reinforced my determination to play till I drop. 
 

Like many I know, my career has been a ‘doughnut’, with parental years the hole in the middle. So I intend to enjoy every last bite!

IMG_4713.thumb.jpeg.a83e3e055b3033d8c154c0659f029423.jpeg

Edited by Rich
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I recentley depped fpr @spongebob whilst he was recovering from a detached retina. I did about 2 months and 15-16 gigs.

I hadn't played bass for nearly a year and it did get the juices flowing again. 

I am depping for him again, tomorrow and looking forward to it.

 

Give it time Andy, it may come back to you. The break is nice. I didn't touch anything during lock down for over 3 months and really enjoyed the break

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The last band I was in was in 2016, last gig was then, too. Every now and then I feel a flicker of interest to get back into that side of things but, when I'm honest with myself, I've little interest in going through the ballache which comes with being in a band and absolutely zero desire to spend any more of my life on motorways driving to rehearsals and gigs. Young me would just get back on the horse and start again, older me is a little wiser, perhaps a little more cynical too, but sees less validity in wasting time on people who don't really share the vision and repeating the process. I could probably find a cover band closer to home but it's a scene I've never been into, it holds no interest for me at all. I never want to play covers just for the sake of gigging.

 

Instead, I've busied myself with writing and recording. I still love trying to come up with new music and I've got plenty of half-written songs which I was always waiting on bandmates to contribute to in order to finish, which I have taken it upon myself to record and finish. This means recording on instruments I'm not exactly proficient on, having to work to get to an acceptable standard on them, writing lyrics, singing (which I'm still massively uncomfortable doing), sound engineering and producing. I want it to sound good, not just crudely put together for the sake of it. As pretentious as it sounds, I'm seeing myself less as a bass player but more of a musician. It's all on me, though. There's no more getting frustrated with anyone else's lack of commitment or skill, songs only get finished if I have the requisite work ethic. The finished piece of music being the reward at the end of it all instead of the feeling of being let-down by others again. The monthly comp was what got me started thinking I could do it myself, provided I was prepared to learn new skills outside the realm of bass playing and really challenge myself.

 

Have a think about what you want to do. If you love music, and I think you must do to be in the position you are, then maybe you don't just get back on the horse and do the same thing you've always done. Maybe you need a different approach how you satisfy your musical urges?

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I don't think I'll ever be ready to give up.

 

Right now I play in two great bands. I'll probably continue to gig until I'm no longer physically capable and then I'll just compose weird instrumental music and stick it out on Bandcamp.

 

It's 3 years since I last bought any instruments, but that's because after 40+ years of buying and selling I have all the right gear that I need. I might buy another Eastwood Hooky just so I have an identical back-up for one band I play in, but unless I join a new band with a very different musical style and/or image, that will be it.

 

I don't think there is anything wrong with giving up. People and their interests change, that's what happens. I just haven't lost interest in composing and playing music yet.

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I felt very similarly during lockdown and again after May 2022, when my main band went on an extended hiatus for various health/other reasons (not me, for clarity). I have reinvigorated myself - and started buying/selling basses again, haha - by joining a band from a different genre that I am used to (goth/post punk) but which I have fond memories of from my youth. Found them on "Joinmyband" website. Maybe a short break is in order and then check out the 'musician wanted' sites and try something a little different, Andy?

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I`m in two bands, one that gigs and one that doesn`t. Somewhat ironically the band that doesn`t gig rehearses more than the one that does - essentially it`s more of a lads get-together where we play some songs and have a laugh, we haven`t even got a singer and don`t want one.

 

The gigging band does about 10 gigs a year, maybe a few more rehearsals than that and we`ve just recorded a new album. I often think where`s the point as we do so little but when I`m gigging/rehearsing/recording with them I get my answer, I simply love it. 

 

Had a bit of a blip earlier this year though due to back issues, I really thought I was going to have to stop gigging but thankfully short-scale basses and a Sansamp are my way forward.

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Im in a band at the moment that is not too full on commitment wise but so many times recently ive been tempted to sell EVERYTHING bar my main bass, buy my dream amp of a B15 and just noodle away at home from time to time.  I think since becoming a dad 11yrs ago my time is much more taken up at weekends with things like taking him to his football, going watching matches, days out etc all of which i love way more than sat trying to learn a song i dont even like for the sake of a band :)

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I've had huge gaps of time in the past doing nothing musical at all, about 20 years in one case. It's something you can put down and pick up again I found. The first gig I did after the long hiatus was an O'Neills type place, pretty packed and went down well, it kind of felt I'd never been away. 

Nothing wrong with having a break from it, can even give you a new perspective and steer you in other creative directions, but bear in mind you can always jump back in again, you're not necessarily by any means "giving up" .. 

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I took up drumming about 10 years ago. When my enthusiasm for bass is on the wane, I do more drumming, and then after a while the need to play bass comes back and the emphasis swaps. It seems that between the two instruments I’ve alway got enthusiasm for one and it keeps it fresh as there’s always a challenge. I’d say playing drums has made me a better bassist as well. 

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I've had a few periods like this over the years, but it always creeps back in. In the last few years I've discovered a passion for building basses and playing them is now firmly in second place. I'm in a gigging covers band at the moment, but if I wasn't I could see myself going ages without actually playing a bass, while still being fascinated by the instruments themselves - so the scrolling through bass websites, I totally understand!

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Like Mickey above, I had a 'doughnut' (great term) musical career with a break for family, I sold everything but one bass (and even that went when I got on here and GAS hit...a regret, one of very few) and for seven or eight years I didn't play much, except for one-off things and at the odd party, but I've been back in for 14 years now, and I can't see it ever going away...even last year, when the main band split up and I couldn't get arrested in terms of a new one, I never stopped looking or auditioning. My boy's away to Uni now, so I've even more time on my hands, and I'm in three bands (one very busy, one occasional and potentially the best of the lot just getting off the ground) and doing jam nights, and I'm still full on it...

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I had exactly the same malaise as you, Andy.

 

Wasn't playing bass, so I did an art class, which was great fun. But I'm not able to paint with oils here as it stinks and nearly killed the cat (long story!). Started running again and riding mountain bikes and road bikes and just doing stuff without having to play bass. And it was/is great fun. 

 

A few years ago I joined a covers band playing funk and soul stuff, which has been great. No need to practice much as it's all simple stuff, and we play 30 odd gigs a year and I earn £100 for each. I also play guitar and run a charity cafe for older people where I bring a guitar and we play songs.

 

I sold up all but the non-essential gear, and I'm a million times happier. Still a few bits to go. 

 

Basically, don't chuck it all away but don't feel bad about losing the passion for it. It'll either come back, or it won't. In the end, it doesn't matter.

 

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Some interesting viewpoints here.

I think that it's natural for our love of music to rise and wain, finding something that reboots that love is what is important when you feel lost.

Personally,  even though I also have periods where I  struggle with my desire to play,  I really can't envisage a time where I would want to be without a bass I can just plug in and play. 

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I did go through a wobbly period during COVID lockdowns - I picked up a bass twice in 2 years and did wonder if I would get back into it once the restrictions were eased.  Gave some serious thought to quitting both my bands and jacking in playing bass.  Glad I didn't though.  I'm somewhat worried about motivation though - I haven't written a song in years, and I remain pretty lazy when it comes to learning new stuff.  We're having to change our singer in the covers band, so maybe that'll provide some impetus, to not appear incompetent if nothing else.

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Never wanted to stop, but definitely been through some down periods..... usually when I've dealt with idiots in bands and I start to wonder "why do I bother?"

I actually played MORE during Covid..... I used the time to play for MYSELF and learnt many songs that I'd always wanted to know how to play. It was fun because I was feeling a sense of personal achievement and not just learning songs for a band because I HAD to. I even started a low key bass covers channel to record the entire experience, just for the hell of it... https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4fUL3cm3mec9PPuWwjxuzA 


Life, family, work etc all get in the way but I actually find solace in my instrument. If I'm feeling down I often find that picking up my bass, sitting in my room and playing along to a favourite song makes me feel better! If nothing else it's an escape for a few minutes...

I'm only playing in a (fantastic) theatre rock show at the moment that does just one big tour a year, so the rest of the time I'm twiddling my thumbs, apart from an occasional function band gig. As a result I'm looking for a local covers band to fill the gaps. It's tricky though.... I don't want to play boring pub blues....but so many of the better, more energetic, pub covers bands don't want a 50+ year old in their band.... 

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