Least amicable band split stories...

[SimonK]

In another thread a forum member mentioned a band finishing with "everyone remaining chums". While I applaud this band for its maturity, I don't think I've ever had a band finish without never talking to at least someone again (which I fear says something about me...).

 

My least amicable split was when we accidentally dropped a flight case on our singers tambourine that she referred to as her "instrument". In penance the guitarist and I went to a music shop to buy her a new one but she didn't like the sound. Thus followed an argument along the lines of "but they all sound the same"... "no they don't"... "well you don't have to play it because it annoys everyone anyway"... etc. and the nickname "Jingle Bells" being coined. I think we only lasted one or two more gigs!

 

I'm sure others can better this!

Edited 15 hours ago by SimonK

[Supernaut]

This has to be BS. You could be an influencer with a story like that. 😁

[lozkerr]

39 minutes ago, SimonK said:

 and the nickname "Jingle Bells" being coined.

I'm nicking that for the next time a colleague thinks it's funny to ask if they can play tambourine in my band!

[Lozz196]

I`ve stayed on friendly terms with everyone I`ve been in bands with, might not see them for years but when bump into them still get on fine. A couple of times individuals have really annoyed me to the point of wanting to leave but I`ve stayed, more out of loyalty to the rest who weren`t being donkeybacksides, and it`s always been the right decision, act with haste, repent at leisure not really being my thing. Similarly I`ve never been in a band where someone has left and had the raging hump with any of the rest of the band. 

[Cat Burrito]

I too have mostly stayed on very good terms with all my ex-band mates. However, I was in a duo in the early 2000s when I first got back into playing again, after a break. The duo quickly became a trio and ran for a few years with the three of us being thick as thieves. The singer used to get a lot of female attention but was always really humble. Then in the last few months, something changed. It was silly comedy things like him taking his shirt off onstage and posing with fans for photos. I probably overthought the whole thing but one possible turning point was us showing up to do an open mic and he was raving about some 19yr old who was playing. He really rated her and I remember saying privately when asked that I didn’t think she was anything special as a performer. He seemed really put out. I then noticed that having had a rock solid friendship that he was barely speaking to me or even looking at me.

 

He was turning 40yrs old that summer and had a wife and two young teenage boys. His wife was always really intense and a little hard work. One day she phoned me whilst I was on holiday to say that the singer had left her and run off with a 19yr old. The band kind of broke up as a result.

 

I saw him about a year or two later and was really pleased to see him. He was cool but a little distant. He then added me on his social media and was messaging me but as the messages started to dry up, I suddenly just started getting invites to like his new band. I wound up deleting him as I obviously wanted more from him than he did from me. I’m still on good terms with the other guy but it was not so much bitter, just bizarre. It had an impact on me for a couple of years but I just put it down to experience. I saw he was selling our albums as digital downloads on Bandcamp but I can’t imagine 20yr old recordings of a band that never made it do too well so wasn’t bothered. He tried to get the other guy to do a reunion without me about 10-15yrs ago but the other guy was classy enough to say all of us or not at all. Oh, and he’s now married to the aforementioned 19yr old, who is nearly 40 and they have kids together. Good luck to them. No malice on my part. A weird ending to what was a great run of music.

[Steve Browning]

To counter the maturity mentioned in the thread referred to. 

 

I played bass in a version of the Brian Setzer Orchestra. It was run by the drummer, a supposedly fearsome bloke. His wife seemed pleasant enough. 

 

Things were fine, and he accepted an invitation to be the drummer at the after show jam that happened at a Blues Weekend. I had put the band together. 

 

The Tuesday night beforehand there is a band meeting called. We turn up at the pub and the drummer turns to me and informs me that I'm a great bloke and brilliant bass player, but he can't play with me anymore. 

 

It seems my (then, and now late) wife had said something to upset his. 

 

I said that I presumed he was honouring the weekend commitment, to which he said 'no'.

 

More bizarre than bad tempered but the best I can offer this thread. 

[Russ]

I was in a band in the late 90s, and we had a "battle of the bands"-type gig lined up. We'd have some trouble getting hold of our guitarist for the previous week or so, and he'd been a bit off at our last rehearal. He showed up at the gig about 10 minutes before showtime, and basically told us this was the last gig, and that he'd decided he didn't like rock music any more. We got up, we did the gig, the guitarist played most of the show with his back to the audience, and then he left immediately afterwards and nobody saw him again for years. It wasn't dramatic or anything, there were no punches or pint glasses thrown, but it felt like a very selfish act on his behalf. He wasn't lying either - a few weeks later I saw his two guitars and his Marshall up for sale in Loot. 

 

For what it's worth, we won that heat of the battle of the bands thing, but, of course, we couldn't progress to the next one. 

 

I guess time heals though, our old drummer and him recently reconnected and started a new band. He obviously rediscovered his love of rock music sometime in the intervening 20-odd years! Our former singer now curates an art gallery in Germany, and I'm stuck out here in the States, but it might be a nice idea to get the band back together for some kind of one-off thing one day. 

[chris_b]

58 minutes ago, Steve Browning said:

. . . . We turn up at the pub and the drummer turns to me and informs me that I'm a great bloke and brilliant bass player, but he can't play with me anymore. . . .

 

 

A few years ago, I was fired by a drummer and it wasn't even his band. I complained to the band leader but she was so intimidated by this guy that she wouldn't talk to him about it!

 

Even more years ago I was being screwed around by a band leader. He started cancelling gigs, then started cancelling gigs and not bothering to tell me!! I told him to shove it and I'd never play with him again, and haven't. It was a shame because that was a very good band!

[Jackroadkill]

I've mentioned this before on BC, but  I once left a band by going to the toilet during a rehearsal and escaping through the toilet window.  There's more to the story, but the crux of it is that I ran away in the least dignified way.

[snorkie635]

In my teenage incarnation, Our band had a disagreement over the tempo of a Santana song we were going to cover. After much heated disagreement, I rolled the drummer's snare down a four-flight, stone staircase. The end.

Probably the best tempo it had kept for a few months.

Edited 20 hours ago by snorkie635

[Burns-bass]

I was once in a band where the singer and drummer were in a relationship. Drummer decided to dump the singer before a gig. As we approached the last song (and therefore the denouement of their relationship) she turned to him in tears and threw her guitar on the floor. I picked it up and played the last song.

[PaulWarning]

27 minutes ago, Burns-bass said:

I was once in a band where the singer and drummer were in a relationship. Drummer decided to dump the singer before a gig. As we approached the last song (and therefore the denouement of their relationship) she turned to him in tears and threw her guitar on the floor. I picked it up and played the last song.

how thoughtless, he could've waited till after the gig

[tauzero]

A band I was the co-founder of somewhere in the early 90s played a few gigs. The guitarist/vocalist got rather sweary between numbers at the last one, and the drummer (who could well have been given an offer by another band so there could have been an ulterior motive) said he was leaving because Steve was too sweary. Our viola player was leaving anyway. Steve then rang me and asked me if he was too sweary, and I was rather non-committal. I went to the rehearsal studio soon afterwards and saw a notice from him saying he was looking for a drummer and bassist who had to realise that there was ONLY ONE BAND LEADER and it was him (we both wrote songs for the band, it was about 2:1 him to me).

 

He did get another set of personnel together and they're still going. Their website has biographies of each member, and in his it says he did the folk clubs as a solo act. Rather a lie, as he and I did them as a duo. At least it was the inspiration for a song I wrote called "Revisionist"...

[jezzaboy]

Fell out with many usually lead guitarist`s who think they run the show. Guess what, they don`t!!

[theplumber]

Was in a band a few years ago. It became apparent that our set was beyond the vocal ability of the singer. After a torturous gig in which he murdered a few rock classics I sent an email to the band suggesting that it may be time to revamp the set and get some rehearsal time booked. Never mentioned the duff singing at all. In all fairness he was ok on about a third of the set. I got a message back suggesting that the band had played that set for years and were in no hurry to ditch anything. Also I was told don't reinvent the wheel and if I wasn't happy,I knew where the door was.... I sent one word back....SLAM!

Edited 15 hours ago by theplumber

[StingRayBoy42]

My legal team have advised me not to contribute to this thread.

[casapete]

Don’t think I’ve ever fallen out with any previous band members but had one or two resent 

my leaving, despite giving them decent notice etc. The last band I left were brilliant though,

and I still keep in touch with them. 

 

From my experience it’s been mainly singers who seek / want a drama when they leave. 
Instead of working as normal through their period of notice, I’ve seen some just start stupid

behaviour on gigs or just putting no effort in at all, as if maybe ( shock horror ) they’re 

seeking attention of any kind. On more than one occasion this has led to near physical

interventions from the band, especially when one singer was caught giving out business

cards on our gig to the new outfit he was setting up in an attempt to steal our clients. He was

lucky to walk away from that incident I think. 🤨

 

[jazzyvee]

I was once recommended to a local singer who was putting a band together to do some gigs in support of her ‘upcoming’ album release. I met the singer and she seemed fine and so were the songs and i agreed to do the two local showcase gigs she had booked. Anyway i learnt the basslines as per the recordings and turned up to all the rehearsals to discover she didn’t know the arrangements and wouldn’t take helpful advice from me or other band members whom like me learnt the stuff. Things were changing every session to the point of us all being confused. I decided i would honour the two gigs and leave after the second gig. As expected the the first gig was dreadful (She thought it was fantastic) and the audience were as shocked as we the band were when her vibratio ad-libs sounded like a strangled turkey. Second gig was worse, and in the interval i told the drummer i was leaving immediately after the gig. Which I did quietly after the last song with a blow by blow analysis of my reasons and she marched off in a huff. I then went to cool down and got talking to a punter and told him i had just left and the reasons for it, then he told me the singer was his wife!!!  Bit awkward but nonetheless before the end of the following week both the guitarist and drummer had quit. A few years later i was compering a stage at a music festival and her new band were on my list do I gave her the same respectful intro as the other bands and then stood in front of the stage with my other half where the singer could clearly see me and enjoyed watching them squirm through their absolutely dreadful out of tune set with the knowledge that she could see my reaction and knowing I was right. Since then a couple of mates agreed to do gigs with her before hearing her and regretted it. 

Edited 9 hours ago by jazzyvee

[Geek99]

14 hours ago, Jackroadkill said:

I've mentioned this before on BC, but  I once left a band by going to the toilet during a rehearsal and escaping through the toilet window.  There's more to the story, but the crux of it is that I ran away in the least dignified way.

Brave, brave Sir Robin 

[Steve Browning]

I'm sure it's part of the longer version, but I have a picture of the other guys wondering why you're taking your bass to the toilet with you. In its case presumably. 

[police squad]

I don't do the falling out with people but I do ignore them.

I was in a band with the drummer kid from BGT and his parents.

It was a really good band.

They're conspirancy theorists (well the dad is) and I just ignore them when I see them

the band didn't end well, singer's ego etc

Horrible horrible people

 

Got sacked by a band and the bass player didnt even come to the meeting. I was pleased to be going though, bass player had been ignoring me on gigs for a few months.

He was very jealous of me, no idea why though. I'm not special or anything like that

I', still friends with the drummer and singer though. Always have a chat when we see each other

[Marvin]

It wasn't a band as such as there was no singer and it never got out of the practice room. The guitarist especially was really unpleasant.  We auditioned a singer to do originals. Great voice. After she left at the end of the audition the guitarist and drummer slagged her off for being "clueless" in the attempt she made. I pointed out she wasn't a mind reader as they'd not given any guidance as to what they wanted. A few weeks later I was told that the project was on hold as the guitarist had too many family commitments. The dopey pair forgot about social media though.  I found out I'd been replaced a few days later on Facebook.  I contacted the guitarist and had my longest swear rant at him.

 

Another band, the singer told us she was leaving after our first gig as she was moving away. We had possibly 2 more gigs before she left which she would do. Next gig, a set list is produced and it's minimal. I said I was concerned there wasn't enough material on it. Was told we'd pad it out with tuning up and talking. I said I thought that was cr@p. All hell broke loose, and ended with me telling them to sod off and I wasn't doing the gig. 

[Leonard Smalls]

The drummer in our band gave us notice that he wanted to leave because we weren't making any money; he had previously played in covers bands and made a few quid every gig...

So we got in touch with an old mate who was between bands, he was very happy to be asked to join, so we told old drummer who was pleased, and we agreed that our next gig would be his last.

On the night of that gig, while we were on stage actually, we got an email saying we'd been accepted for Rebellion.

And old drummer threw his toys out of the pram - accused us of knowing in advance and forcing him out, then stormed off and immediately unfriended us all on FB as did his wife and daughter. He's recently re-friended me, wants to know how everything is going with the band, possibly in the hope that everything's worse without him. Which it isn't - different but not in a bad way, in fact better in some ways, and slightly worse in others...

Still, life's too short for ridiculous grudges!

[BigAlonBass]

16 hours ago, Burns-bass said:

Drummer decided to dump the singer before a gig. 

Yet another example of a Drummer having bad timing...

[Jackroadkill]

2 hours ago, Geek99 said:

Brave, brave Sir Robin 

 

In my defence I was young, inexperienced and foolish, but essentially, yes - I buggered off!

 

2 hours ago, Steve Browning said:

I'm sure it's part of the longer version, but I have a picture of the other guys wondering why you're taking your bass to the toilet with you. In its case presumably. 

 

I left all my gear and went back for it under the cover of darkness (well, late afternoon).