Happy Jack Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 [quote name='neilb' timestamp='1334166699' post='1611960'] From the venue manager " I will turn the Sky off when you start, OK?" Yeah...righto! [/quote] Easily dealt with ... the band (complete with instruments) goes and stands in front of the nearest big screen and starts watching. The bar staff will get the message soon enough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Low End Bee Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 [quote name='Happy Jack' timestamp='1334239435' post='1613052'] No problem with Yammy or Suzi but I never really got on with [b]Kawa.[/b] [/quote] That's 'cause you're Kwackers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy Jack Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 [quote name='Dandelion' timestamp='1334228258' post='1612786'] "Pitchy" A word usually uttered by crappy TV show judges. " You were a bit pitchy in places." Usually accompanied with a reciprocating wavy hand gesture. [/quote] Strangely enough, I've recently discovered "pitchy" and I've found it quite useful. A singer trying too hard will sometimes oscillate between singing a bit sharp and a bit flat (not that this has ever happened to me, of course ) and "pitchy" is a perfect piece of verbal shorthand for this situation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bassace Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 [quote name='flyfisher' timestamp='1333903241' post='1608001'] "in the zone" WTF does that mean? Within walking distance of the correct note? [/quote] Ask Coulthard Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bassace Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 (edited) Chops - originally slang for lips, so if a trumpet player was good he'd be said to have good chops. Then it spread to saxes and everyone else. Not long ago someone remarked 'he's got great chops but I don't like what he plays'. Perfectly valid. Number - from the time when all pads were numbered and the leader would call out a, er, number. My pet hate is commentators referring to a sound rising to a crescendo - the crescendo is itself the act of rising, usually to ff. When our band played a bit loud, the person who booked us asked if we could keep the tempo down. BTW, always ask Gregory or sausage. Gregory Peck - cheque, and sausage and mash - cash. Edited April 12, 2012 by bassace Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gafbass02 Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 [quote name='51m0n' timestamp='1334234782' post='1612959']"Compression kills dynamics" - no it doesnt, not ever, thats like saying "guns kill people" - they dont people (mis)using guns kill people, like people mis-using compressors kills dynamics. Usually stated by people who have absolutely no idea whatsoever about how compressors work, what they sound like, how to really set one up etc etc. Boils my p*** dry in moments. And relax....... [/quote] Thank you. Thank you thank you thank you!!! I won't play without compression, and yet my use of dynamics is something I take great care over. And oddly it's never been killed by my compression. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janmaat Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 One phrase I really don't like is "could you turn the volume of that bass down" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sean Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 (edited) [quote name='lowdown' timestamp='1334157604' post='1611779'] Comes from days gone by. IE - On the Titanic gig, the band had to learn around 300 songs. The songs were listed and numbered in a pamphlet given to the passengers. The band played in various rooms around the ship all day long. Passengers would choose a song from the pamphlet, walk up and shout out the number to the Band leader, who shouted the 'Number' to the band. [/quote] From a Health and Safety perspective, this is a superb idea and probably saved lives. Imagine if they had to remember 300 song titles rather than just numbers and then suddenly mid-gig one of the punters from steerage started shouting, "Iceberg! Iceberg!", the poor cellist would be fumbling around thinking, "Cor, blimey, I dunno that one, is it to the Rhythm Changes in Bb?" and by the time he's realised the ship's in trouble, he's lost his footing and fallen overboard. I might even try and adopt this system for my band, just in case. And the phrase I hate is when punters that have booked you ask you, "Do you think you could[b][i] tone[/i][/b] it down a bit?" Uh, yeah, I'll roll all my EQ off except the low end which I'll max out and I'll scream the nuts off the compressor, is that dub enough for ya, guv'nor? Edited April 12, 2012 by Sean Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Modulus Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 When people refer to a bass part as a lick Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skej21 Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 (edited) [quote name='51m0n' timestamp='1334234782' post='1612959'] Last gig I saw had a concert band with full kit and orchestral bass drum, and a full set of timps too. The difference in sound is unreal, an orchestral bass drum really desevers the name [b]bass[/b], its 'kin [i]HUGE[/i] compared to a namby pamby kick drum, the orchestral drum wasnt even going through the PA, and it dominated the room. Tone, instead of timbre, which is just a 'better' word for it - so there! "Compression kills dynamics" - no it doesnt, not ever, thats like saying "guns kill people" - they dont people (mis)using guns kill people, like people mis-using compressors kills dynamics. Usually stated by people who have absolutely no idea whatsoever about how compressors work, what they sound like, how to really set one up etc etc. Boils my p*** dry in moments. And relax....... [/quote] Funny that we both agree that orchestral percussion should be named a 'bass' drum, yet you somehow manage to place me in the firing line for your rant... I might just stop posting if I get ranted at when people AGREE! As for the compressor thing, I didn't even mention compressors :s Basschat sebatical for me I think :s Edited April 12, 2012 by skej21 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twigman Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 [quote name='lowdown' timestamp='1333973972' post='1608911'] You might want to meet my annoying neighbour, who points to our baby grand and always comments bang on cue...... 'What about banging out something on THE big Organ of yours' He laughs his stupid ugly head off, and his lovely charming wife dies of embarrassment. Garry [/quote] You could invite his wife to bang one out on your big organ. I suspect that might shut him up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubinga5 Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 the worse phrase when someone is explaining how good there bass is..... "It plays like butter"... what a pointless non descriptive load of nonsense... very annoying... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dad3353 Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 [quote name='bubinga5' timestamp='1334401260' post='1615655'] ... "It plays like butter"... [/quote] Doesn't the expression come from this... [url="http://www.thomann.de/fr/stork_bassposaune_heavy_15.htm"]http://www.thomann.de/fr/stork_bassposaune_heavy_15.htm[/url] ... where, in comparison, one can't tell Stork from butter..? For those old enough to remember, but not so old as to have forgotten. Sorry; I have my coat on all ready... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lowdown Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 [quote name='Dad3353' timestamp='1334406760' post='1615767'] For those old enough to remember, but not so old as to have forgotten. Sorry; I have my coat on all ready... [/quote] Taxi for Dad3353 Garry Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
icastle Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 [quote name='lowdown' timestamp='1334407730' post='1615802'] Taxi for Dad3353 [/quote] Sounds like a fair swap under the circumstances... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discreet Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 [quote name='icastle' timestamp='1334407968' post='1615805'] Sounds like a fair swap under the circumstances... [/quote] Do it before they change their minds. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lowdown Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 (edited) [quote name='icastle' timestamp='1334407968' post='1615805'] Sounds like a fair swap under the circumstances... [/quote] What a mouldy rusty old Citreon, for a mouldy rusty old erm.......Drummer ? Jesting of course. Garry Edited April 14, 2012 by lowdown Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dad3353 Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 [quote name='lowdown' timestamp='1334408963' post='1615826']What a mouldy rusty old Citreon, for a mouldy rusty old erm.......Drummer ? ...[/quote] Libel action coming up... [quote name='lowdown' timestamp='1334408963' post='1615826']...Jesting of course.... [/quote] Well... Alright then, just this once (...but wotchit..!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGreek Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 "..can we have a bit more volume on the guitar.." "..two two..one two, one two.." One for Bilbo.." Do you do Moondance??.." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leon Transaxle Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 I'm so glad to see all these comments about "playing like butter". I just thought it was me having been out of serious playing too long being out of touch. Personally I would rather it played "like a bleeding VC10" (to quote the sleeve notes of Quadrophenia). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leon Transaxle Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 I'm so glad to see all these comments about "playing like butter". I just thought it was me having been out of serious playing too long being out of touch. Personally I would rather it played "like a bleeding VC10" (to quote the sleeve notes of Quadrophenia). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
51m0n Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 One, Two One, Two One, Two..... Threeeeeeeyyaaahhhhhh! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Norris Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 [quote name='51m0n' timestamp='1334562517' post='1617481'] One, Two One, Two One, Two..... Threeeeeeeyyaaahhhhhh! [/quote] Oh that's my favourite bit of audience participation, and always sounds so original every time. I'd really love to explain to them why musicians use 'One, Two' to sound check mics, but know it's really just not worth the effort Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LiamPodmore Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 [quote name='TheGreek' timestamp='1334427282' post='1616157'] "..two two..one two, one two.." [/quote] My bands vocalist did a much more fun version of this a few weeks ago "One two, one two, one two three four five, once i caught a fish alive, six seven eight nine ten, then i let it go again" Plays like butter? Has it got smooth, creamy tone to it as well? Liam Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thisnameistaken Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 I still quite like 'Testes, one two'. Twenty years of it and I still chuckle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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