Phrases to watch out for in Ads….

[Rayman]

The things sellers say either in the ad or when you arrive to collect the bass:
 

1: “I’ve never touched the truss rod” - means; I’ve ragged the truss rod to the max and stripped the nut.

 

2: “it hasn’t been played in years” - means; It’s knackered.

 

3: “I’m not a bass player” -

means; It’s Knackered.

 

4: “selling it for a friend “ -

means; it’s knackered.

 

5: “I just want it to be used/to go to a good home -

means; it’s knackered.

[Trueno]

Never gigged… means it’s unplayable.

[BigRedX]

10 minutes ago, Rayman said:

1: “I’ve never touched the truss rod”

 

I've never touched the truss rod of most of the guitars and basses I've owned. In countries like the UK with a moderate climate if you need to be adjusting the truss rod often there is something wrong with the neck. The only basses where I've had to do any major truss rod changes were one I bought from Florida in the US where the climate is very different to here, and one that came fitted with some very high tension flat wound strings which I immediately replaced with my favourite round-wound set. I've also owned several basses with no truss rod.

 

14 minutes ago, Rayman said:

2: “it hasn’t been played in years”

 

At one point I had almost 50 guitars and basses. I was using one guitar for songwriting and two basses for gigs. Apart from a few I had out on stands on the off-chance that I might pick them up and play them, the rest were packed away in their cases. Right now most of my possessions, including the instruments I don't need for either of my bands, are in storage. None of those have been played since they were packed away 4 years ago.

 

18 minutes ago, Rayman said:

3: “I’m not a bass player”

 

I'm not really a guitar player or a synth player. Hasn't stopped me from owning them (or even doing gigs playing them). I'm not much of a bass player really either...

 

21 minutes ago, Rayman said:

4: “selling it for a friend “

 

I've sold several things for friends who only had a couple of things to sell and couldn't be bothered with the hassle of starting an eBay account. I did make sure I knew what I was selling though, mostly so I could describe them accurately so they would sell for their true value.

 

23 minutes ago, Rayman said:

“I just want it to be used/to go to a good home

 

When I had my big clear out a few years ago, other than to get some money for the instruments I sold, was so the ones I wasn't using and would be unlikely to use at any point in the future would go to musicians who were more likely to use then on a regular basis. Among these instruments were my very nice Sei Fretless, a limited edition Japanese Yamaha bass, and two very old Overwater Original Basses (one of which may have been the first 5-string bass ever made by Overwater and previously owned by a well-know session player). I hope all of them are getting more use than they would if I'd kept them.

[ped]

You’re just a maverick renegade 

[Waddo Soqable]

Don't forget... "I don't know anything about basses.." 

[Rayman]

51 minutes ago, Waddo Soqable said:

Don't forget... "I don't know anything about basses.." 

“ I don’t know anything about anything” (jazz hands up in front of him) “if there’s anything wrong with this thing, don’t blame me, because I don’t know anything”. 

[Frank Blank]

2 hours ago, Rayman said:

5: “I just want it to be used/to go to a good home -

means; it’s knackered.

 

I put this on the majority of my for sale posts on BC, it means I just want it to be used/to go to a good home.

[Frank Blank]

1 hour ago, ped said:

You’re just a maverick renegade 

 

Here comes the hotstepper (murderer)
He's the lyrical gangster (murderer)
 

[Burns-bass]

2 hours ago, BigRedX said:

 

I've never touched the truss rod of most of the guitars and basses I've owned. In countries like the UK with a moderate climate if you need to be adjusting the truss rod often there is something wrong with the neck. The only basses where I've had to do any major truss rod changes were one I bought from Florida in the US where the climate is very different to here, and one that came fitted with some very high tension flat wound strings which I immediately replaced with my favourite round-wound set. I've also owned several basses with no truss rod.

 

 

At one point I had almost 50 guitars and basses. I was using one guitar for songwriting and two basses for gigs. Apart from a few I had out on stands on the off-chance that I might pick them up and play them, the rest were packed away in their cases. Right now most of my possessions, including the instruments I don't need for either of my bands, are in storage. None of those have been played since they were packed away 4 years ago.

 

 

I'm not really a guitar player or a synth player. Hasn't stopped me from owning them (or even doing gigs playing them). I'm not much of a bass player really either...

 

 

I've sold several things for friends who only had a couple of things to sell and couldn't be bothered with the hassle of starting an eBay account. I did make sure I knew what I was selling though, mostly so I could describe them accurately so they would sell for their true value.

 

 

When I had my big clear out a few years ago, other than to get some money for the instruments I sold, was so the ones I wasn't using and would be unlikely to use at any point in the future would go to musicians who were more likely to use then on a regular basis. Among these instruments were my very nice Sei Fretless, a limited edition Japanese Yamaha bass, and two very old Overwater Original Basses (one of which may have been the first 5-string bass ever made by Overwater and previously owned by a well-know session player). I hope all of them are getting more use than they would if I'd kept them.

Not every post on BC is directly addressed to you… (especially the ones that are quite obviously jokes).

 

You also missed:

 

”I’ve been told it’s all original, but I have no means of checking”

 

”I don’t want to take the neck off as I can damage it”

 

Earlier this week I saw a vintage Telecaster bass and asked some questions. The guy said “I don’t care how original it is, I’m a player not a collector”, which would be fair, but if that’s the case don’t ask the same price as a vintage shop for your bass.

 

It remains unsold.

[Paul S]

I've probably said all those things at one point or another  

[Rayman]

Me too…. That’s how I know them 😆

[Waddo Soqable]

13 minutes ago, Paul S said:

I've probably said all those things at one point or another  

I'm sure we've all done a bit of bullshlting in our time.. I'd certainly put my hands up to that..

[BillyBass]

I haven't but next time I sell something on the marketplace I'll just come back to this thread and copy and paste the OP

[neepheid]

Buttah!

[Frank Blank]

3 hours ago, Rayman said:

The things sellers say either in the ad or when you arrive to collect the bass:
 

1: “I’ve never touched the truss rod” - means; I’ve ragged the truss rod to the max and stripped the nut.

2: “it hasn’t been played in years” - means; It’s knackered.

3: “I’m not a bass player” -

means; It’s Knackered.

4: “selling it for a friend “ -

means; it’s knackered.

5: “I just want it to be used/to go to a good home -

means; it’s knackered.

 

6: Plays like butter

Quite possibly, it might also present like classic hip dysplasia either way it means f*** all.

[Waddo Soqable]

I think the  "plays like Buttah"  is a "septic" thing, I've not seen it in a Brit ad.. 

[paul_c2]

"Lovingly displayed on a wall hanger, never been played" - it only fell off once, maybe twice.

 

"Lovingly stored in its case, never been played" - tried a wall hanger but it fell off 17 times, the final straw being when it fell into the fish tank.

 

"Lovingly displayed on a stand" - we used to have a dog, its only fallen over 317 times. The dog died recently. The bass might/might not have been involved in its death.

 

"Great for metal" - this bass belongs on a metal grate, of a solid fuel stove, once its been cut up into small pieces.

 

 

Edited April 15, 2023 by paul_c2

[binky_bass]

"Not sure if its a genuine Fender" - 100% knows it's a moody as fook knock off that a dead cat would recognise as not being legit.

 

"Got it in a house clearance" - a smashed to pieces unusable hunk of good for nothing fire wood. 

[Waddo Soqable]

There's always the "Needs new Strings"

.. Often accompanying a pic of the said instrument, usually very dusty, that's got no strings on it.... 

[snorkie635]

7 minutes ago, binky_bass said:

"Not sure if its a genuine Fender" - 100% knows it's a moody as fook knock off that a dead cat would recognise as not being legit.

 

"Got it in a house clearance" - a smashed to pieces unusable hunk of good for nothing fire wood. 

So you've seen my bass?

[rushbo]

"If you know, you know." 

I'm a wimpy, liberal, white collar, art school dropout, but when I see that phrase used in ads, I feel like I would be able to deal swift, devious and painful retribution to the perpetrator. 

Edited April 15, 2023 by rushbo

[Rayman]

Just now, rushbo said:

"If you know, you know." 

I'm a wimpy, liberal, white collar, art school dropout, but when I see that phrase used in ads, I feel like I would be able to deal swift, devious and painful retribution to the perpetrator. 

That’s another one….. a guy said that to me recently while trying to sell me a Columbus Jazz posing as a future classic.

[Old Horse Murphy]

"As new", apart from a great big ding on the body. 
 

"upgraded"- I've changed the pickups, bridge, tuning pegs and dicked about with it so much that nobody else will ever want it. 
 

"from a pet-free home". It's not a carpet, it's a bass and maybe actually you'd be a bit happier and fulfilled in life if you had a furry friend anyway. 

[Woodinblack]

5 hours ago, Rayman said:

4: “selling it for a friend “ -

means; it’s knackered.

 

Its nicked!

 

"I don't know what it is, its from my dad, it says fender or something and it he bought it in 1964"

Its an encore.

[Waddo Soqable]

13 minutes ago, Old Horse Murphy said:

"As new", apart from a great big ding on the body. 
 

"upgraded"- I've changed the pickups, bridge, tuning pegs and dicked about with it so much that nobody else will ever want it. 
 

"from a pet-free home". It's not a carpet, it's a bass and maybe actually you'd be a bit happier and fulfilled in life if you had a furry friend anyway. 

And  "smoke free home" of course...