krispn Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 I was playing a gig at the weekend and the 'headline act' were naturally sound checking first. The bassist had tried his clean tone and then used his effect box when the sound guy asked: Soundguy Anything else that would affect your volume level? Bass player No but i'll need to change the amp settings for one song. I wanna take some treble and top end off. SG OKaaay... but you'd be better doing it on the bass? BP Oh OK! (pauses for about 5 seconds) Anyone know how I'd go about doing that? SG Erm see those knobs on your bass? At this point 4 people approached the stage. I'm not sure if was to help or just to get a little closer to a real life genius! The disappointing bit was even a few drummers knew what to do! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cheddatom Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 Once while playing drums for a fairly heavy rock band, I asked the soundman if I could rotate the kick mic 90 degrees so that it was facing the skin instead of the side of the drum. He said "there are two ways to mic a kick drum you know, leave it alone". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paul_5 Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 I was once asked by a saxophonist if I could DI the drums... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goblin Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 In an orchestra I used to play in, conductor once told my section (French Horns) and the Trombones that we were too loud and needed to play a bit quieter, and we would try again from etc. So second time, we didn't play at all and he just went "yeah that's fine guys, keep up the good work" ... prick Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goblin Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Oh and when I had the Acoustic rig, someone said to me "Does Acousic mean I can plug my acoustic guitar into it?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JTUK Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Our violin player hitting the stage floor with his chin as he couldn't risk putting his hands out to stop the fall as he was holding his very valuable violin in one and the expensive bow in the other. The crash sent a huuugge thump through the P.A.. and me and the drummer cracked up and the time wavered... When we played back the recording... we cracked up again..!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EssentialTension Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 [quote name='JTUK' timestamp='1337414295' post='1659450'] Our violin player hitting the stage floor with his chin as he couldn't risk putting his hands out to stop the fall as he was holding his very valuable violin in one and the expensive bow in the other ... [/quote] There should be a medal for that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
geoffbyrne Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I've seen similar done with a guy holding a bottle of whisky - Scottish, of course! (As I am). G. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grand Wazoo Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Talcum Powder!! Yiip! I once had to sub for a band doing a east end gangsters type wedding in Bethnal Green, and after a week of rehersals, on the day of sound check the singer who was a a rockabilly afficionado, asked the soundcheck man to provide him talcum powder so he could slide on stage doing his split and twist motions. I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me whole. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dave_bass5 Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I was once told by the sound guy (up on the next floor) my radio system was a bit noisy through their large PA. Never had any problems before but i had a lead with me so fair enough. Once i had changed to using the (20ft) lead the sound guy told me "thats much better, come up here and have a listen" lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Truckstop Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Once went to see Ackercocke and in between songs this tool kept shouting "LOUDER! FASTER!" Never laughed so hard in my life. Even the band had to crack a smile. Truckstop Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeystrange Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I remember playing a gig in Tenby once. I think there were about 8 bands playing and we were on next to last. The last band soundchecked then the engineer asked us to soundcheck. We played half a song and then asked for some changes onstage. To which the engineer replied "There's no point, it'll sound completely different when you go on anyway." I've still got no idea why he even asked us to soundcheck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JTUK Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 Friend asked me to soundcheck them i the pub as it was a new band and he was a little unsure... After half a song, I said the drummer should come up a little as he was a bit lost ..to which the drummer repiled, thats ok, I play louder when we start... WTF...!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
molan Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I was running stage sound for Hawkwind once. The band roadies set everything up and then I rigged up all the interconnects to the desks. I walked over to check levels on the mics and when I got near to Dave Brock's one the tour manager yelled at me to keep away from it and ran across the stage at breakneck speed. It turned out that the only person who was allowed to even speak into Dave's mic was Dave himself because he was worried about germs. We then had to wait about 20 minutes for Dave to amble out of the dressing room where the band were partaking of 'refreshments'. He walked to the mic, flicked it with his finger, a thump came through the monitors & he ambled back again. . . I also once worked at an outdoor festival where Sade was headlining with Bad Manners on directly before them. Both bands were using the same core stage setup & vocal mics. Sade (or her crew) had apparently been a bit stroppy with Bad Manners during soundcheck. When they finished their set I saw Buster Bloodvessel take the lead vocal mic, stuff it down the back of his bands and give his bum a really good wipe with it. As he came off stage he said "that'll teach her to 'arsey' with me, now she'll know what it smells like: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dave_bass5 Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 [quote name='JTUK' timestamp='1337432744' post='1659852'] to which the drummer repiled, thats ok, I play louder when we start... WTF...!!!! [/quote] My drummer is always like that. In fact the whole band (other than me) are. We never seem to sound check at a normal playing level. In fact if anything the guitarist turns down once we start playing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gelfin Posted May 21, 2012 Share Posted May 21, 2012 [quote name='JTUK' timestamp='1337414295' post='1659450'] Our violin player hitting the stage floor with his chin as he couldn't risk putting his hands out to stop the fall as he was holding his very valuable violin in one and the expensive bow in the other. The crash sent a huuugge thump through the P.A.. and me and the drummer cracked up and the time wavered... When we played back the recording... we cracked up again..!!! [/quote] Saw Chris Squire do the same thing at Cardiff CIA. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmccombe7 Posted May 21, 2012 Share Posted May 21, 2012 And the classic "turn everything up louder than everything else" Now that is pure Rock and Roll and my fav. Dave Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monckyman Posted May 22, 2012 Share Posted May 22, 2012 Lazy drummers are a constant pita for me. Some singers are the same. "saving" their vocals for the gig. With the result that everyone else begs for the lead vox down in their monitors in the first song. My favourite soundcheck quote remains, Singer " f*** me, that snare`s well too loud,turn it down!" Me "I can`t turn it down, I haven`t even got a Mic on it" Singer " Well put a f***ing Mic on it, and THEN turn it down!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
andrewrx7 Posted May 22, 2012 Share Posted May 22, 2012 A rhythm guitarist we used to play with had a favourite saying. We would tell him he was too loud and ask him to turn down to better balance out the band...he would pretend to turn the volume pot on the amp, and then when we tell him again that he is still too loud and whether he had actually adjusted anything, he would just reply..."don't worry, I'll left the amp and turned down on the guitar". He never did. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
andrewrx7 Posted May 22, 2012 Share Posted May 22, 2012 Not necessarily heard, but saw...we had set up in a small pub, with the drummer squeezed into a small bay window area, and started to sound check. The drummer then decides that the area is too well lit, so gets up, removes the light bulbs from the wall lamps, and promptly puts them in his pocket..."i'll 'ave those for later"... And he did leave with them still in his pocket. We suspect he was missing a few bulbs at home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
andrewrx7 Posted May 22, 2012 Share Posted May 22, 2012 We've had the classic taxi and occasional police through the guitar amps when we used to run wireless a number of years ago. Oh, and some French radio channel bizarrely enough at one rehearsal! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LiamPodmore Posted May 22, 2012 Share Posted May 22, 2012 (edited) [quote name='Grand Wazoo' timestamp='1337419414' post='1659556'] Talcum Powder!! Yiip! I once had to sub for a band doing a east end gangsters type wedding in Bethnal Green, and after a week of rehersals, on the day of sound check the singer who was a a rockabilly afficionado, asked the soundcheck man to provide him talcum powder so he could slide on stage doing his split and twist motions. I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me whole. [/quote] I saw a guy cover his drums in Talcum Powder so it would make a nice effect for the first song or two, looked quite good actually, but was slippy as f*ck when we went onstage afterwards. My bands vocalist once went for the usual "one two one two, one two blahblahblah" like he tends to, but put his own spin on it out of boredom, so it went something along the lines of: "One two one two, one two.. one two three four five, once i caught a fish alive, six seven eight nine ten, then i let it go again..." And also starting his soundcheck by singing the words "And all he needs, is someone sweet, to spend her evenings sitting on his meat" Liam Edited May 22, 2012 by LiamPodmore Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gust0o Posted May 22, 2012 Share Posted May 22, 2012 [quote name='molan' timestamp='1337433400' post='1659880'] I was running stage sound for Hawkwind once. The band roadies set everything up and then I rigged up all the interconnects to the desks. I walked over to check levels on the mics and when I got near to Dave Brock's one the tour manager yelled at me to keep away from it and ran across the stage at breakneck speed. It turned out that the only person who was allowed to even speak into Dave's mic was Dave himself because he was worried about germs. We then had to wait about 20 minutes for Dave to amble out of the dressing room where the band were partaking of 'refreshments'. He walked to the mic, flicked it with his finger, a thump came through the monitors & he ambled back again. . . I also once worked at an outdoor festival where Sade was headlining with Bad Manners on directly before them. Both bands were using the same core stage setup & vocal mics. Sade (or her crew) had apparently been a bit stroppy with Bad Manners during soundcheck. When they finished their set I saw Buster Bloodvessel take the lead vocal mic, stuff it down the back of his bands and give his bum a really good wipe with it. As he came off stage he said "that'll teach her to 'arsey' with me, now she'll know what it smells like: [/quote] Brilliant! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gafbass02 Posted May 22, 2012 Share Posted May 22, 2012 The '80's US rock band that spent two hours off their heads on something (wouldn't let us in the dressing room!) giggling onstage and saying "My finger in your ass..... Noooo dude , my finger in YOUR ass, no, no man. My finger in YOUR ass" to each other. While we watched, bemused and a bit cross to see our soundcheck time wasted this way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chrismanbass Posted May 22, 2012 Share Posted May 22, 2012 [quote name='JTUK' timestamp='1337414295' post='1659450'] Our violin player hitting the stage floor with his chin as he couldn't risk putting his hands out to stop the fall as he was holding his very valuable violin in one and the expensive bow in the other. The crash sent a huuugge thump through the P.A.. and me and the drummer cracked up and the time wavered... When we played back the recording... we cracked up again..!!! [/quote] similar situation not strictly a gig. In a LIve performance lesson at uni my flatmate decided it would be very rock and roll to put his foot on the monitor. What he hadn't counted on was that they were wedges and flipped over if you put any weight on them. Needless to say said guitarist and guitar went tumbling off stage landing in the front row of seats into the singing teachers lap. The shriek of the singing teacher could be heard through the 3 inch thick (supposedly) soundproof doors aparently. p.s. it was a pink song so not very rock and roll anyway Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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