Careful what you wish for

[lownote]

11 years ago I took up bass.  I am very unmusical so it's been a slow and often depressing grind to achieve competence. What carried me through was the unwavering obsession of Getting in a Band.  Finally, a year ago, I got there.  I was given the bass chair in one of the better regional rock and blues band in my area. Yay. YAY! 

But now, goal finally achieved,  I'm finding the same music, the same band mates (all of whom are great BTW), the same hassle getting gigs, then playing the same music to more or less drunk people in the same pubs. And a question:

So - where do I go from here?  

I am fully expecting considerable abuse for this post ("kin ell, you're in a gigging band and you're wingeing!"), but I'm also hoping to harvest some positive thoughts from those who've been down this route as to what carried them on into the future. 

Edited March 3, 2022 by lownote

[Steve Browning]

I guess much depends on what you want? Was it all just an itch you wanted to scratch?

 

You've been in the band a year. It's, I guess, a reasonably popular band on the local circuit, based on what you say. In many cases, that's it. If you don't enjoy the gigging that most of the people (on here) do, then progressing is going to be tough. As you aim to 'move up the ranks', you will be competing with (possibly) players with more ability, or experience.

 

Much of anybody's progress is down to luck. I was playing in a similar band, based in Brighton, and was playing at a bonfire night gig. Afterwards, a couple of guys came up and asked if I'd like to do some sessions on bass for a forthcoming Pretty Things LP. I said yes, and was eventually asked to go on the road. That led to lots of other opportunities.

 

Now I'm not putting myself forward as anything special. My own progress arose from doing exactly the sort of gigs you are doing now and I was in the right place at the right time.

 

 

[Nicko]

I got fed up with the never ending cycle of formng a band, getting good enough to gig, getting gigs, arguing about set lists, not enjoying gigs, the band falling apart for trivial reasons, forming a band........etc.

 

I've given up on the idea and I'm happy enough writing and recording on my PC - virtually no one listens other than those that click through the link in the monthly BC comp.

[Old Horse Murphy]

I'm in two bands currently. One of them gigs probably once a month which is enough for me right now. Any more than that is a bit too much like a second job and just not that much fun. They're a lovely bunch of people as well as good musicians but I think if we tried something more regular it wouldn't work quite as well. 
 

The other band is a group of mates who I've played with for years and we're still signed to a small record label. We get together once in a while to write and record originals but also twice a year (max) we do a big corporate covers gig which is an absolute blast and a great laugh catching up with everyone. I must say, the anticipation of getting together is impetus enough and the adrenalin and buzz from it keeps me going. 
 

I guess what I'm saying is that there's always options in finding bands or musicians who don't flog the heck out of gigging and you may find that more rewarding as it doesn't become such a chore. Works for me anyway. 

[Lfalex v1.1]

25 minutes ago, Nicko said:

I got fed up with the never ending cycle of formng a band, getting good enough to gig, getting gigs, arguing about set lists, not enjoying gigs, the band falling apart for trivial reasons, forming a band........etc.

 

Absolutely this.

No matter how good or bad a player I am, I've no stomach for the interpersonal politics and tensions within a band. 

 

I've been "sacked" (as though there were contracts and real money involved) from bands for not being malleable enough,  being to old and playing too well (!)

I've walked out of bands because of other people's ethics at least twice (and it ought to be about the music) and so on...

 

I now play for my own entertainment and relaxation. 

 

Occasionally, I wonder what it'd be like to be in a band again. 

 

Then I remember that the concept of being in a band is much more attractive than the reality of being in a band. 

[BreadBin]

I currently play semi acoustic originals with two mates I really get on with. The songs are (to me) really great, I get genuine pleasure from being part of it and look forward to playing to more audiences. If it wasn't enjoyable, I wouldn't do it.

Maybe find something that gives you that feeling? 

[Man.about.Tyne]

15 minutes ago, Lfalex v1.1 said:

 

I now play for my own entertainment and relaxation. 

 

Occasionally, I wonder what it'd be like to be in a band again. 

 

This hits the nail on the head.

 

I’ve not played regularly for long time (though I have managed a few one offs now and again) but reading the OP it makes me reflect on the idea that I’d like to get back into a band.  I really would like to do something but is it really worth the grief?  If you’re young then the answer is “yes”!   Do it.

 

I need some chilled old f*rts to play with.

[chris_b]

Playing in a great band with good musicians is what makes it all worth while.

 

For me there are no downsides to playing bass.

 

I can't think of doing anything better.

[Reggaebass]

Apart from the occasional private reggae party or studio get together I’ve got no intentions of joining any bands, I’ve had 2 offers lately but declined, I just can’t commit or be bothered to lug my stuff around London, I’m happy enough just doing what I’m doing these days 🙂

[skidder652003]

For me gigging is the whole reason I play bass. If I gave up gigging I’d drop the bass like a hot potato and play guitar!

[BassAdder60]

It’s the issue with Norfolk and Suffolk music venues in the main 

 

So few decent ones left 

[fleabag]

Playing live is the end result and joy of all the pain of learning the instrument.  The colossal amount of Queen's sovs i've invested ( and lost ) over the years also inspires me to keep on keeping on. Otherwise , why ?

 

I've done the band route like most and have run the gamut of members feeble excuses for missing rehearsals...  my kid has an ingrowing eyelash , the mrs has changed her ladies night ,  there's a vowel in the month,  full moon, blah de blah. 

 

I've been in bands where the " the leader " was a tyrant and simply would not tolerate criticism,  a lead guitarist who during a gig would play, without fail, at least one lead guitar part a semi-tone out.  So predictable that we started calling him semi-tone.

 

So, right now, i'm in the process of setting up a duo with backing tracks.  It means more hard work, as i have to play all the recorded drum backing tracks, and double up on guitar for some stuff.  But at least my partner in crime is a good bloke, has rehearsal space at his enormous gaff, recording equipment , plays the main guitar and does vocals.

He also has a very understanding wife.  Kids all grown and have foxtrot oscared out of the house.

 

It's a good place to be

 

 

[BassAdder60]

I’m very fortunate that the band I formed last year are fantastic people and a joy to spend time with.

 

We enjoy rehearsals and a beer or two and just returned from the studio 

[tony_m]

Similar to @BassAdder27, I'm fortunate to have joined a band which suits me to a tee. We're all in our 60s, and while this is my first gigging band, the others have all done their time playing the pub circuit, and simply aren't interested in doing that any more, or replicating what umpteen other bands in the area play. As it is, the response to our first three gigs so far (all in local village halls) has been encouraging, likewise the comments we've received on social media. We are spreading our wings and doing a couple of pub gigs in the next month or so, so we'll see how they go, but as far as we're concerned, they're not make-or-break - if they don't work out, we'll just stick to our Local Shows for Local People and doing bits of recording etc. for our own pleasure.

[Bassfinger]

Im in the same spot, but I've just turned 54 and I'm happy with my lot.  Had I been 20 I might be wanting to go onwards an upwards, but I'm happy to be showing off to a crowd and playing bass with my mates, even if the other bits are sometimes an enbuggerance.

 

Still, despite never being in the next Cream and having a record deal I do occasionslly get recognised locally. 2 days running last week two different ladies stopped me in the street to express their admiration and ask when we were next playing. That was kinda nice.

 

Just try and enjoy it for what it is. I certainly do.

[Burns-bass]

Play double bass. You get all the annoyance with the added bonus of having to lug a wooden canoe around with you!

 

All joking aside, if you do t enjoy it, why bother? I gave up for several years as I don’t enjoy it and I barely practice at home anymore. When I do play live I enjoy it.

[grandad]

For me, after several years of the weekend warrior circuit, corporate events, weddings & local festivals, I too became weary of the lugging about & repetition. Old age also crept up. 

 

How to keep on doing something you love to do but without the hard work? How to continue to enjoy the social side & maintain the good friendships. 

 

In my case we, the band members, formed a music club at our local community centre, (Quarry Bank Music Club). Open to all ages regardless of skill level we meet twice a month. Anyone can get up and have a go with plenty of willing musicians to back them. Everyone gets applauded for just that, getting up and having a go. A great night socially with cups of tea & biscuits, many friendships formed & folk just having a go for the pleasure of making music.  Links have been made locally with other venues. 

 

Aside from that I was invited to play with a Jazz quartet, weekly practice & the occasional gig. This really broadened my repertoire. We must have getting on for 100 numbers in our music folders now ranging from jazz standards to pop. Sometimes other musicians join us & vocalists too. Just playing for pleasure. 

 

Don't pack it all up, just a change of scene might be the thing!

 

[BassAdder60]

On and off I’ve been in bands for 40yrs and in that time I’ve only really enjoyed my current band.

 

Ive learnt to only work in a band with people that are good to spend time with and are mostly more talented than myself !

 

I think if you’re not enjoying it and before quitting look for or start a new band more to your liking.

Play different or better venues but don’t give it up as like most I’ve done that many times before.

 

So to a fellow East Anglian based bassist decide if it’s for you and if not and you cannot influence any change then look for a new band. There are many bands starting up again so you have opportunities to enjoy playing bass how you like it 

[uk_lefty]

I get exactly what you mean! It can go stale going round the same venues, playing the same stuff. So, does anyone else want to freshen up the set? A good shortcut is "this Aerosmith song is good, so let's learn a similarly good one to switch it with" etc. For venues, where do you like going for a weekend away? Try and get some gigs there, make a weekend of it with the family or the band or both. 

 

OR... Do you like multiple genres of music? If you have time try to get into a second group playing something completely different. Change of pace, style, scene, type of gigs, new people. Even if they play songs you wouldn't normally listen to you'd get something out of it musically. 

 

As I said to a whining drummer I used to play with, if you find it boring it's your job to make it interesting.

[Joe Nation]

51 minutes ago, grandad said:

In my case we, the band members, formed a music club at our local community centre, (Quarry Bank Music Club). Open to all ages regardless of skill level we meet twice a month. Anyone can get up and have a go with plenty of willing musicians to back them. Everyone gets applauded for just that, getting up and having a go. A great night socially with cups of tea & biscuits, many friendships formed & folk just having a go for the pleasure of making music.  Links have been made locally with other venues. 

This sounds brilliant, exactly what I feel like I need right now (if I had the time!).

 

I've never been anywhere good enough to gig - I can barely make it through one song without messing something up. I was in a band with some mates from sixth form back in about 2000 (oddly enough in Diss, same as the OP), but we mostly messed around and watched Kerrang instead of practicing. The self-appointed lead guitarist was a bit of an ego, really into metal and refused to play much else, but the rest of us had more varied tastes - even then I could sense he was going to pull the band in a direction I didn't want to go, but it fell apart when half of us went to uni. I always felt like starting a band with my friends would be easier and more successful than joining a band with strangers, but maybe that just makes it more complicated because you've got the friendship and the band to worry about.

 

I reckon if you're not one for gigging twice a week every week, aim to practice little and often but gig few and far between - elite runners train for months for one marathon, they're going to ruin themselves if try to race every weekend.

Edited March 4, 2022 by Joe Nation

[BassAdder60]

13 minutes ago, Joe Nation said:

This sounds brilliant, exactly what I feel like I need right now (if I had the time!).

 

I've never been anywhere good enough to gig - I can barely make it through one song without messing something up. I was in a band with some mates from sixth form back in about 2000 (oddly enough in Diss, same as the OP), but we mostly messed around and watched Kerrang instead of practicing. The self-appointed lead guitarist was a bit of an ego, really into metal and refused to play much else, but the rest of us had more varied tastes - even then I could sense he was going to pull the band in a direction I didn't want to go, but it fell apart when half of us went to uni. I always felt like starting a band with my friends would be easier and more successful than joining a band with strangers, but maybe that just makes it more complicated because you've got the friendship and the band to worry about.

 

I reckon if you're not one for gigging twice a week every week, aim to practice little and often but gig few and far between - elite runners train for months for one marathon, they're going to ruin themselves if try to race every weekend.

Good advice … you need to enjoy it or stop doing it or change the part you don’t enjoy !

[Lfalex v1.1]

1 hour ago, Burns-bass said:

All joking aside, if you don't enjoy it, why bother? I gave up for several years as I don’t enjoy it and I barely practice at home anymore. When I do play live I enjoy it.

 

(From a personal point of view,  and not in direct response/contradiction to the above)

 

I do still enjoy playing, and there are aspects of live performance that I enjoy (The onstage, making music as a unit part)

Alas that bass playing and band membership don't exist in isolation from the rest of anyone's existence; I work in a very physically tough job and have to deal with Joe Public at his absolute worst. 

When I'm done with work,  I've little time and no energy left to drag gear around and drive for hours/miles to rehearsals and gigs.

Then to be forced to interact with Joe Public again is yet another (sizeable) negative. 

 

If things do change,  I'll certainly be fairly "match fit", but while the negatives continue to outweigh the positives, it isn't worth it for me.

[Newfoundfreedom]

I'll be honest, I've never liked gigging.

 

Firstly, I can't stand all the waiting around. If you have an evening gig, it's the same feeling I get when I used to work night shifts. You're just waiting around all day to go to work. Horrible!

 

The setting up and lugging gear around is always a PITA! 

 

I can't bare the nerves and anxiety. Playing a gig always feels to me like having a fight. The horrible sickly nerves and adrenalin beforehand, then the rush of dopamine afterwards when you feel like you've gotten away with it. 

 

The thing I really hate is when you finally do come off stage, and you've had a good gig, and you're finally getting some enjoyment out of it. Everybody else is already p#ssed, drinking up, and on their way home. So instead of getting to finally enjoy it, you just have to pack up and go home. I was a doorman (bouncer) for several years, and honestly, gigging almost feels like the same job. 

 

I love the creative aspect of being in a band, and I love making music. It's always been about hanging around with mates and being creative for me. That's all I've ever really been bothered about. The idolisation of a crowd? Couldn't care less. 

 

So to make it all make sense, we've just started live streaming. I have a rehearsal room all fully set up. So we bring the audience to us. Just turn up, turn on the equipment, fire up the computer, and we're playing to an audience. 

 

We are actually going to get out and do some "real" gigs this summer. But the majority of them will be afternoon, beer, barbeque, party type events which I much prefer. At least after an afternoon set, there's still time to chill out with a couple of beers and relax. 

Edited March 4, 2022 by Newfoundfreedom

[chris_b]

I just don't understand how people can treat playing bass like playing a round of golf!

 

No wonder you all get disillusioned and fed up if you are only playing with people who think the same way.

[BassAdder60]

I love being in a band and gigging

 

Im very relaxed and confident live so I can enjoy the night and my band buddies generally get a buzz from it.

 

I love rehearsals and everything related to band work.

 

If I could make a living from it I would !