Those 'train wreck' moments

[rogo]

me and the two guitarists from my band turned up to an open mic night a few months ago, where we had pretty bad luck to say the least. During the first song the PA caught fire, which was promptly put out and I was simply told to plug back into, then the rhythm guitarists strap snapped in half which lead to us stopping our best song half way through, then the lead guitarist snapped 2 strings at once and ran off before the third song and left me awkwardly telling jokes to a not very impressed audience lol. Good night overall though 

[drTStingray]

Though it pains me to say it, I’ve been involved in quite a number of these, one way or another…… 🥴

 

An interesting one which springs to mind was a gig in the Home Counties - I think Farnborough/ Aldershot way - we were booked for a NAAFI gig along with a deejay who worked for the same agent - on driving into the location, we were met by the spectacle of the deejay, who had been involved in quite a serious collision in his van, and was sporting a somewhat bloodied face and hands and a barely drivable van. Anyway he performed his role after being patched up a bit.

 

However, the place was packed with young men, and another act on the bill was meant to be a stripper - who failed to show up.
 

We went on stage with our rather attractive young lady singer to do our disco/soul set - you can imagine the atmosphere in this place - the slightly intoxicated and rowdy audience expecting our singer to be doing the exotic dancing as well 🥴 

 

We got through the set without a riot occurring though it was one of the most nerve wracking gigs I’ve ever done. 

[Bassman68]

Remembered a couple more incidents over night..

 

Being Essex based, I used to play around the bars in Colchester (used to have a large military presence with barracks there)

One particularly venue ‘Fagins Den’ used to open late night, with the band playing from about 11 o’clock.

This particularly evening, the crowd mostly consisted of Squaddies who by appearance, had just done a ‘hand to hand combat’ course, much alcohol was imbibed & you can guess what’s coming…..

After one guy got jabbed in the throat, it all kicked off….Bottles,glasses,bar stools flying.

The band played on as we were tucked away in an alcove….

The M.P’s arrived & all I can say is Wow, they don’t hold back?…..The Red caps virtually emptied the venue of anyone with short hair.

We packed up shortly after..

 

Another town, another venue, a different band..

First gig at this place, parking in the High street a distance from the pub.

I was carrying my first item of gear(Bass cab) to the entrance, along with the drummer with his kickdrum, when a barstool smashes through the front window…

We just glanced at each other, turned round & walked back to our cars…

[40hz]

This has been my favourite thread in quite some time!

[EBS_freak]

31 minutes ago, Bassman68 said:

Remembered a couple more incidents over night..

 

Being Essex based, I used to play around the bars in Colchester (used to have a large military presence with barracks there)

One particularly venue ‘Fagins Den’ used to open late night, with the band playing from about 11 o’clock.

This particularly evening, the crowd mostly consisted of Squaddies who by appearance, had just done a ‘hand to hand combat’ course, much alcohol was imbibed & you can guess what’s coming…..

After one guy got jabbed in the throat, it all kicked off….Bottles,glasses,bar stools flying.

The band played on as we were tucked away in an alcove….

The M.P’s arrived & all I can say is Wow, they don’t hold back?…..The Red caps virtually emptied the venue of anyone with short hair.

We packed up shortly after..

 

Another town, another venue, a different band..

First gig at this place, parking in the High street a distance from the pub.

I was carrying my first item of gear(Bass cab) to the entrance, along with the drummer with his kickdrum, when a barstool smashes through the front window…

We just glanced at each other, turned round & walked back to our cars…

I can relate.

 

I dont do military baracks gigs anymore - every one I have done has been met with incident. No need to recall the stories, they are as you'd imagine... and pretty much as Bassman68s story.

 

Turn up > wrestle with IDs getting entrance to the venue > everything is a pain in the derrière as you are clearer an outsider > Play gig > something kicks off > chaos follows > try to get yourself and your gear out of there as quick as you can.

 

Nothing gets you sweating like a drunken squaddie screaming "play only Oasis" in your face.

[Rich]

12 hours ago, Nail Soup said:

I want the TV series 👍

Groom played by James Fleet.

Bride by Katie Price.

Groom's family by the Crawleys out of Downton Abbey.

Bride's family by the cast of Shameless.

Meat 'chefs' by Cheech and Chong.

Band by Steel Panther.

[EBS_freak]

26 minutes ago, 40hz said:

This has been my favourite thread in quite some time!

Get yourself out playing as many gigs as you can, and you'll be part of the stories before you know it...

 

The crazy thing is, you don't even realise you are part of these crazy stories at the time because even though the funniest incidents aren't guaranteed to be a regular occurrence, they start popping up more times than you realise.

 

I mean, hasn't everybody played at least one wedding where the cops have been called and blood been shed? And despite what you would think, the more monied and pompous the clients are, the worse the "unplanned and unwanted events" seem to be.

 

Corporate gigs are mostly uneventful in comparison. Yes, you can play some fantastic events - but it also usually involves a whole day or just waiting around in a small roof that fast becomes hot, stuffy, stinky (food and fart related usually) and immensely boring. The only that I can remember having a great time when waiting to go on, is when the comedian booked to host the night was was in the room with us. I was hurting due to the amount of laughter.

[TimR]

Ha yes. 

 

Played one wedding where we were packing down and then the screaming and shouting started. One of the female guests accused another of 'nicking the cancer tin' which all the guests had been making donations instead of buying gifts. 

 

Apparently the guest was always nothing but trouble and out thieving. 

 

Hair being pulled, names being called.

 

We tried to load out while the men tried to calm it all down.

 

Then someone appears from out back and asks what's going on. 

 

"Oh, I've got the tin, I took it for safe keeping"

[police squad]

31 minutes ago, EBS_freak said:

Get yourself out playing as many gigs as you can, and you'll be part of the stories before you know it...

 

The crazy thing is, you don't even realise you are part of these crazy stories at the time because even though the funniest incidents aren't guaranteed to be a regular occurrence, they start popping up more times than you realise.

 

I mean, hasn't everybody played at least one wedding where the cops have been called and blood been shed? And despite what you would think, the more monied and pompous the clients are, the worse the "unplanned and unwanted events" seem to be.

 

Corporate gigs are mostly uneventful in comparison. Yes, you can play some fantastic events - but it also usually involves a whole day or just waiting around in a small roof that fast becomes hot, stuffy, stinky (food and fart related usually) and immensely boring. The only that I can remember having a great time when waiting to go on, is when the comedian booked to host the night was was in the room with us. I was hurting due to the amount of laughter.

I'm in a function band that played at a wedding reception.

Did the first dance, families didn't get along

Complete riot. They all started fighting, Police came, people arrested.

Band didnt even finish the first dance but the barman had the money and they still got paid

[yorks5stringer]

Just remembered this one but have mentioned it before in another thread.

 We had a band with a female singer ( now married to quite a famous record producer) and played a pub in Bingley , West Yorks on a weekend night. Whilst there were some fairly genteel pubs in Bingley, this was not one and at some point in the evening I seem to recall 2 women being thrown out for fighting. Anyway the stage area in this pub had a pool table and the way it was moved off the stage area was via a type of low trolley  that fitted under the table  and was jacked up. Now our female singer nearly always wore jeans but on this occasion was uncharateristically wearing a dress. We started the gig and after a couple of numbers a drunken punter lay on the trolley on his back and jockied the trolley to right below the singer at the edge of the stage and proceeded to upskirt her (although we did not know that term at the time). Singer moved back from the edge of the stage so said punter decided he would just whizz around the dancefloor on his back and on the trolley. Barstaff arrived and ejected him but along with the woman fighting it was a first until just before lockdown when I played a pub in Frome where 2 women had a fist fight too......

[TimR]

And everyone has played that wedding where no matter what tunes you play, no one dances and they just all stare at the band and clap after each song...

 

Haven't they?

 

With the only 3 people on the dancfloor two toddlers and a teenage boy racing up and down and skidding on his knees.

[Newfoundfreedom]

My previous covers band played at an outdoor, afternoon charity event. A nice walled off garden of a hotel complex on a sunny afternoon. What could go wrong. 

 

To get a bit of shade from the afternoon sun, we set up under a pergola full of vines, which seemed like a lovely spot at the time. 

 

We were really nervous as it was our first public gig. Then just to make matters worse, just before it was time to play, the owner came up and said, (insert name I can't remember) from The Drifters is in the audience. Sure enough. There was one of The Drifters front and centre, watching closely about 20 feet from where we were playing. Nothing worse for making an already nervous amateur band more nervous than knowing there's a professional watching. 

 

So we launched into our first set, and it was godawful! The vines soaked up all the sound, and as we'd never played anywhere than in a small room before, we didn't even own monitors. So myself and one guitarist at one side of the drums, couldn't hear the other two guitarists at the other side of the drums, and vice versa, and none of us could hear the bass drum at all, so we were playing at totally different times. The singer was in the middle and didn't know who to follow. It was dire! Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, I realised the nice shady vines we'd set up under was home to thousands of mosquitos, right around the time one of them landed on my eyeball. They absolutely ate us alive for the whole gig. 

 

We struggled to the half time break, at which point, The Drifter got up and left. We were mortified! 

 

Then the owner came over when he saw us all deflated, and ensured us it didn't sound too bad from out front, and asked what the problem is. We said we couldn't stay in time because we couldn't hear the drums, at which point he said, "Well we've got another drummer in the crowd". Now as it turns out, what he meant was, the other drummer could sound check while we went out front to listen and adjust accordingly. However, he never got time to explain, as that was the point or drummer, believing she was being scapegoated for the bad timing, went into full meltdown mode and started packing her kit away. The drummer is married to one of the guitarists so obviously he was well on his way as well. 

 

After several minutes of trying to get everyone calm, the other guitarist, who is usually extremely quiet, well spoken, and never swears. Just bellowed "F#ck The Drifters!" and after about five seconds of silent shock, we all fell about in fits of laughter. 

 

We played the second set absolutely perfectly, despite the continuous mozzie onslaught, and from that day on, "F#ck The Drifters" became the bands mantra. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[mowf]

16 minutes ago, TimR said:

And everyone has played that wedding where no matter what tunes you play, no one dances and they just all stare at the band and clap after each song...

 

 

Yep, until about the second to last number when they all decide now's a good time to start dancing.

[BigRedX]

And following on from my first story...

 

One of the bands on the bill at that gig were "impressed" enough with our performance (or more likely wanted a band that didn't need to use their kit) and offered us a support at their next gig in Leicester. They didn't have room for us in their van, but we were told that they would pay our train fare out of the door money as the venue was one they had played before and there was good crowd.

 

On the evening of the gig as we arrived at the train station in Nottingham it started to snow. By the time we arrived in Leicester it was falling steadily and settling. Most of the buses had already stopped running and notices were going up in the station about train delays and cancellations. It took us about 30 minutes to walk to the pub venue with our gear getting colder and wetter all the time. We arrived just in time to set up, soundcheck, grab a drink and then it was time for our set. The only other people in the pub were the other band, the PA guys (this was in the days when few venues had in-house PA systems and if you didn't have your own you'd hire one in for the gig), the landlord, and 2 bar staff. Half way through our set one paying punter came in bought a half and then sat as far away from the "stage" as possible. 

 

By the time we'd finished, the snow was still falling and was now pretty deep. We decided that if we wanted any chance of getting back to Nottingham that night we had better leave now while there was a chance that the trains were still running. At this point the other band told us that they had organised with the PA guys to take us back to Nottingham with the PA so that we could stay for their set. It's just as well that they did, as the one paying punter left after their first song song and the landlord let the staff go early, so the main band played to us, the PA guys and the landlord.

 

Despite all this the band got asked back for another gig, and which my next "proper" band supported them at. That went much better.

[Oopsdabassist]

Yay the snow gig!

 

We piled over to Bracknell in 4 different cars, under grey skies.  A few flakes started falling while we loaded in, the 2 barmen commented, 'might be a quiet night'  By the time we started, snow was 3 inches deep and audience was 1 man and his dog...honest! It got no better and at half time, the barmen said, knock it off guys, snow is getting worse...and he paid us!  He wasn't kidding about the snow, I got stuck behind jack-knifed lorries on a hill on the M25......for 4 flippin hours, got home about 03.30, guitarist had to abandon his care 4 miles from home and walk...guitar in hand lol.  The other two got home ok and annoyed me for hours....'are you there yet?'

[BigRedX]

Snow appears to be much less of a problem these days than it was in the 80s and 90s. I've done two in the last 10 years in conditions much worse than the one described above - and much further afield - but both were well attended and we had no problem getting to and from the gig (although we did have to clear almost 6 inches of snow off the band van at the one in Liverpool before we could drive home).

[MacDaddy]

19 minutes ago, BigRedX said:

And following on from my first story...

 

One of the bands on the bill at that gig were "impressed" enough with our performance (or more likely wanted a band that didn't need to use their kit) and offered us a support at their next gig in Leicester. They didn't have room for us in their van, but we were told that they would pay our train fare out of the door money as the venue was one they had played before and there was good crowd.

 

On the evening of the gig as we arrived at the train station in Nottingham it started to snow. By the time we arrived in Leicester it was falling steadily and settling. Most of the buses had already stopped running and notices were going up in the station about train delays and cancellations. It took us about 30 minutes to walk to the pub venue with our gear getting colder and wetter all the time. We arrived just in time to set up, soundcheck, grab a drink and then it was time for our set. The only other people in the pub were the other band, the PA guys (this was in the days when few venues had in-house PA systems and if you didn't have your own you'd hire one in for the gig), the landlord, and 2 bar staff. Half way through our set one paying punter came in bought a half and then sat as far away from the "stage" as possible. 

 

By the time we'd finished, the snow was still falling and was now pretty deep. We decided that if we wanted any chance of getting back to Nottingham that night we had better leave now while there was a chance that the trains were still running. At this point the other band told us that they had organised with the PA guys to take us back to Nottingham with the PA so that we could stay for their set. It's just as well that they did, as the one paying punter left after their first song song and the landlord let the staff go early, so the main band played to us, the PA guys and the landlord.

 

Despite all this the band got asked back for another gig, and which my next "proper" band supported them at. That went much better.

 

5 minutes ago, Oopsdabassist said:

Yay the snow gig!

 

We piled over to Bracknell in 4 different cars, under grey skies.  A few flakes started falling while we loaded in, the 2 barmen commented, 'might be a quiet night'  By the time we started, snow was 3 inches deep and audience was 1 man and his dog...honest! It got no better and at half time, the barmen said, knock it off guys, snow is getting worse...and he paid us!  He wasn't kidding about the snow, I got stuck behind jack-knifed lorries on a hill on the M25......for 4 flippin hours, got home about 03.30, guitarist had to abandon his care 4 miles from home and walk...guitar in hand lol.  The other two got home ok and annoyed me for hours....'are you there yet?'

 

It was in the news recently about the Oasis tribute band who got snowed in at a pub for several days.

When they were rescued, they were a Noel Gallagher tribute band, and a Liam Gallagher tribute band 😝

[Doctor J]

When I was around 16 or 17, I was in a band with my schoolmate, drummer Glen and some older people from where he lived, playing 80's-style hard rock which, since this would have been 90-91, wasn't too much of a crime. We were playing some multi-band event which was going to be televised and got to record our song in a real studio which we would then mime to on the night of filming. All good and very exciting for a pair of kids like Glen and I.

 

On the day of the event, we were asked to show up to the venue, a large ballroom in a very posh hotel, at noon and it was explained to us that we would be going through several rehearsals for the show so the TV cameras could get their angles right and all that other technical stuff we we oblivious to. They ran through the entire show, so each band got up and played in sequence, eight bands in total. Our band were second in rotation. 
 

Hearing yourself coming loud through a PA was very exciting and quite surreal in the sense that if you stopped playing, you could still hear yourself playing. Glen and I were getting great craic out of this. Hey, we were kids. Tearing down, then watching the next band set up, play their song, tear down, then through the rest of the bands, then repeat the whole process three times in all, it got fairly tedious quite quickly and the other three in the band, who were a good few years older than us and quite grown-up, were acting grown-up and schmoozing so Glen and I were popping to the bar and getting a beer or two as we hung around and watched the other bands. Glen was 18 and I looked older than I was, so we had no trouble getting served.

 

By the time of the show, we were both unintentionally rather tipsy and, with the venue now filled with comfortably the largest audience either of us had ever performed to, quite giddy on a mix of beer and adrenaline. The first band played and then we were up. Our song was a power ballad type of thing, keyboards and clean guitar to start, then bass drum and rimshot snare and I came in with the first chorus when it became more power and less ballad.

 

I was standing there on stage, looking moody and emotional as I waited for the bass part to come in. Just before the drums started, I heard Glen calling my name. I turned around to see him waving his right foot at me as the bass drum played loud and proud which was probably the funniest thing I had seen in my life, or so it felt at that time. We both spent the rest of this moody song trying, and sometimes failing, to suppress the giggles in front of several hundred people and the TV cameras. During my two close-ups, I'm not playing anything resembling the real bass line.

 

Glen was a top fella, brilliant drummer and has played to slightly larger audiences since with The Script and I reckon has learned to keep his foot on the pedal 😁

Edited January 27, 2022 by Doctor J

[mcnach]

On 25/01/2022 at 14:43, Dood said:

 

I know a bass player who forgot his drummer once.

 

I had to drive all the way back to collect him.

 

Not quite the same but... I once, erm, I mean I know someone who once forgot his drummer's snare.

 

This was only realised when setting up in Inverness, and we drove from Edinburgh. Oh how I laughed.

Fortunately the sound guy knew someone drinking downstairs at the bar who was a drummer. He kindly offered us his snare... only trouble is he stayed about 15 miles away and you can't go too fast on those little roads. We managed with plenty of time to spare, but it was a bit more stressful than I like.

 

Drummer never left anything with me again

 

[ubit]

Our guitarist used to play in a function band with his cousin and some others. They were playing at a wedding once and his cousin announced over the mic " Right, bride and groom up for this  one please? Great and can we have the brides parents too please? Stage whisper from the side.... Al.......Al, they're dead!

[EBS_freak]

1 hour ago, Newfoundfreedom said:

My previous covers band played at an outdoor, afternoon charity event. A nice walled off garden of a hotel complex on a sunny afternoon. What could go wrong. 

 

To get a bit of shade from the afternoon sun, we set up under a pergola full of vines, which seemed like a lovely spot at the time. 

 

We were really nervous as it was our first public gig. Then just to make matters worse, just before it was time to play, the owner came up and said, (insert name I can't remember) from The Drifters is in the audience. Sure enough. There was one of The Drifters front and centre, watching closely about 20 feet from where we were playing. Nothing worse for making an already nervous amateur band more nervous than knowing there's a professional watching. 

 

So we launched into our first set, and it was godawful! The vines soaked up all the sound, and as we'd never played anywhere than in a small room before, we didn't even own monitors. So myself and one guitarist at one side of the drums, couldn't hear the other two guitarists at the other side of the drums, and vice versa, and none of us could hear the bass drum at all, so we were playing at totally different times. The singer was in the middle and didn't know who to follow. It was dire! Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, I realised the nice shady vines we'd set up under was home to thousands of mosquitos, right around the time one of them landed on my eyeball. They absolutely ate us alive for the whole gig. 

 

We struggled to the half time break, at which point, The Drifter got up and left. We were mortified! 

 

Then the owner came over when he saw us all deflated, and ensured us it didn't sound too bad from out front, and asked what the problem is. We said we couldn't stay in time because we couldn't hear the drums, at which point he said, "Well we've got another drummer in the crowd". Now as it turns out, what he meant was, the other drummer could sound check while we went out front to listen and adjust accordingly. However, he never got time to explain, as that was the point or drummer, believing she was being scapegoated for the bad timing, went into full meltdown mode and started packing her kit away. The drummer is married to one of the guitarists so obviously he was well on his way as well. 

 

After several minutes of trying to get everyone calm, the other guitarist, who is usually extremely quiet, well spoken, and never swears. Just bellowed "F#ck The Drifters!" and after about five seconds of silent shock, we all fell about in fits of laughter. 

 

We played the second set absolutely perfectly, despite the continuous mozzie onslaught, and from that day on, "F#ck The Drifters" became the bands mantra. 

 

Reading the words "The Drifters" automatically made me laugh.

 

Round my neck of the woods, singing or playing in "The Drifters" has become a bit of long standing joke - or even a rite of passage. So long story short, there are no original Drifters left, none of the singers or musicians involved with "The Drifters" have anything linking them to the original band. It's just a name owned by a group that is throwing musicians together and touting them as "The Drifters" or the "The Official Drifters". If you find any predominantly midlands based musician, likelihood they have in their credits, played with "The Drifters". In reality is a theatre tribute show.

 

I remember auditioning somebody for a band at the time who was obviously quite proud of this achievement... to which I replied, "Crumbs, it's harder to find somebody who hasn't played for The Drifters nowadays". Lets just say, management had an interesting management style and she sacked people as quick as she hired them. And I loves that fact that on the talkback mic, there was the MD on stage... and her from the back of the theatre shouting at everybody on stage.

 

So yeah, "F#ck the Drifters". Absolute farce.

 

Check out the wiki page - members and litigation paragraphs are probably the ones to focus on.

[EBS_freak]

2 minutes ago, ubit said:

Our guitarist used to play in a function band with his cousin and some others. They were playing at a wedding once and his cousin announced over the mic " Right, bride and groom up for this  one please? Great and can we have the brides parents too please? Stage whisper from the side.... Al.......Al, they're dead!

That's no excuse. Just go to the churchyard and dig up their old bones...

 

That reminds me. My nan insisted that my grandpa came with her to my brothers wedding... as a pile of ashes in a box. Had his own space at the table, much to my brothers annoyance (at least I think he was... it's one of those things we dont talk about)

 

Is that normal? Or not? I'm not sure. But there's a first time for everything I guess.

[ubit]

The night this picture was taken we were playing at a pretty large charity event in town. I had downed a bottle of wine to myself and carried on with pints once we got to the pub. By the time we went on I was so drunk the Keyboard player/rythm guitarist was playing with one hand and holding me up with the other. I have no idea what we sounded like  as I was so drunk but people said it was the best they had heard me singing. I am so glad no one recorded it right enough.

[TimR]

13 minutes ago, EBS_freak said:

Round my neck of the woods, singing or playing in "The Drifters" has become a bit of long standing joke

 

I played a gig where 'the bass player from the Kinks' was also playing in his band. So I had a bit of a chat with him. 

 

Then a few weeks later played at a party where the 'bass player from the Kinks' was in attendance. He'd changed quite a bit in such a short time. 

[TimR]

6 minutes ago, TimR said:

Then a few weeks later played at a party where the 'bass player from the Kinks' was in attendance. He'd changed quite a bit in such a short time. 

 

Actually, even that gig has a story attached... 😆