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Those 'train wreck' moments


Boodang

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As per the thread title, in terms of train wreck 'moments', rather than the whole gigs, I'm sure we've all had plenty of those?

At various gigs I have had to, and other band members have had to:

Catch a falling PA speaker that a (drunk) punter has crashed into.

Do some tap dancing because a (drunk) punter stepped on one or more FX pedals.

Deal with the (drunk) punter who tries to take a microphone.

Avoid the (drunk) and usually (always) female punter who is trying to steal my hat while I'm playing.

Plenty more...

 

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I had the misfortune years ago to experience a strange episode. We were playing in a local bar which had a stage that was only about eight inches high. Enough to raise you above most punters heads. I had just split up with a girl who worked for this delivery company. The family that owned the delivery company were, well, rough shall we say? We were playing away and this girl from said family stood on the stage with her back to me facing the pub. There was hardly any room and I was playing and singing with this girls head about six inches from my mic. Completely blocking me from the audience. Obviously this was meant to wind me up as it was an aggressive move but I had no clue as to how to deal with this. The bouncer came up and gestured for her to get down. She did and as soon as he left she got back up. If it had been a guy it would have been an easier situation but as it was a girl who was hard as f***k and built like a man my coolness left me and I was powerless to act. I just kept playing and singing to the back of her head. Luckily after a while of this she tired of this game and left. I can't think why I was targeted as my ex had finished with ME and I had not caused any problems.

 

 

On the bright side I don't think their business is going anymore. 😃

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22 hours ago, Muzz said:

In the function band, we often rearrange the first set (well, we have what would loosely be called a 'flexible' setlist - basically the BL calls them in the order he fancies; I don't mind, because he's very good at reading a room) around the number of Darling Kiddiwinks allowed/encouraged onto the dance floor by their doting parents, which usually precludes anyone else from dancing...

 

On the 'sliding across the floor on knees' thing, the Singist/geetard/BL got carried away and tried that once, in some verrry cheap dress trahsers; cue instant tearing, the sound of the double-squeak of knees suddenly and painfully gaining traction, and him pitching forward onto his face with a resounding clang...the drummer and I played on, unable to look at each other, while he was helped to his feet and guided by kind hands back to the stage...

 

I tried it once in she'll suit bottoms which instantly melted to both my knees. 😆

Edited by Newfoundfreedom
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A rhythm and blues band I was in a few years back, played lots of shows with Dr Feelgood, including one at the Robin II in Bilston. About 30 minutes before we were due to start our set, I was putting our merch stand together. As we couldnt put our backdrop on the stage, I thought it would be a great idea to have it behind the merch table. So, I nimbly jumped on a bar stool (in my cuban heels) to pin the backdrop to the wall and almost immediately, not-so-nimbly, fell off onto my right arm. It hurt, but I could still move it. "This is a good sign" I thought. We got through our set, but as I was breaking my rig down, my arm really started to hurt. I drove (!) home and thought about going to A&E, then in typical dumbass man style, I decided that a couple of paracetamol and a good night's sleep would sort it.

 

Nope.

 

I took myself off to A&E bright and early the next morning. Diagnosis: fractured right arm. I was in plaster for a week, which just happened to coincide with two other gigs and my week off from work. Oh what fun.

 

Usually when I tell this story, I try to impress people with the line  "Did I ever tell you about the time I played a gig with a broken arm..?"

Edited by rushbo
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2 hours ago, Newfoundfreedom said:

 

It was the late 80's and I was in my early teens. Everybody wore a shell suit. 

 

Err!!

 

Jeans and Hawaiian shirts for me.

 

About 5 years ago I played a gig in Stevenage and a punter came up and said, "I'm wearing this (loud) shirt in your honour". Apparently he was a regular at our weekly residency in Camden in the late 80's and was impressed by my shirts! So much so, he remembered me some 33 years later! So punters do notice the bass player, even if it's only for their dress sense.

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1 hour ago, chris_b said:

 

Err!!

 

Jeans and Hawaiian shirts for me.

 

About 5 years ago I played a gig in Stevenage and a punter came up and said, "I'm wearing this (loud) shirt in your honour". Apparently he was a regular at our weekly residency in Camden in the late 80's and was impressed by my shirts! So much so, he remembered me some 33 years later! So punters do notice the bass player, even if it's only for their dress sense.

Late 80s for me was mullet with skin-tight jeans, a t-shirt with the sleeves cut off and a leather jacket.

 

Ten years later (and about another ten stone) I was in Birmingham one evening, wearing a shirt with flowers on it and with hair long enough to mop my sweaty bollocks with (should I so choose), and a bloke approached me, absolutely convinced I was Meat Loaf.

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1 hour ago, Leonard Smalls said:

This was me in the late 80s 😁

 

brocobig.jpg

That makes me very glad that there’s no photo of me dressed as Frank’N’Furter!

 

Edit: Found a pic of me from the mid 90s. Not quite as magnificent as your outfit, but very different from 80s Hair Metal me (despite the hair metal t-shirt…) and, even more so, me now…

 

 

CA60F68E-6337-4232-9106-3C368CDE10D6.jpeg

Edited by KingBollock
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