EdwardHimself Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 I'm just wondering because the more i think about the guitar player in our band, the more i don't really like him. Obviously, we have to work with poeple you don't like, so do you think this applies to being in a band as well? The problem is that we live in the middle of nowhere and we're having enough trouble finding anyone as it is, so we can't really afford to ditch him so i dunno i just have to work with what the hell i got i suppose. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Funk Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 (edited) For now, just try to work with him. As you get better, you'll be able to draw from a larger pool of musicians. That's the time to take your bass off mid-gig and whack him in the balls. Until then, keep your cool. EDIT: I was in a band called Jazzistic in '06. Some great musical chemistry with the bandleader (and with the guitarist from my other band who I roped into it). Eventually the guitarist and I couldn't get on with the bandleader anymore personally or professionally. Eventually that killed off the music. Edited December 7, 2009 by The Funk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
E sharp Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 (edited) [quote name='EdwardHimself' post='677205' date='Dec 7 2009, 09:08 PM']I'm just wondering because the more i think about the guitar player in our band, the more i don't really like him. Obviously, we have to work with poeple you don't like, so do you think this applies to being in a band as well? The problem is that we live in the middle of nowhere and we're having enough trouble finding anyone as it is, so we can't really afford to ditch him so i dunno i just have to work with what the hell i got i suppose.[/quote] Is this the same thread as the one asking if you've ever been in a band with your other half ? Edited December 7, 2009 by E sharp Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sturm Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 right now im not sure i like anyone in the band im in Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YouMa Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 I despised my first singer he reminded me of tommy steel,and could only write bloody awful pop songs,i was renting a room from him and one day i had just had enough of his face and chirpy piss taking,so i just left. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thisnameistaken Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 I've only ever been in one band where I liked everybody. Usually it's sax players who are the problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skankdelvar Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 (edited) Exactly my position at the moment. The reason why I don't like him is he oversold his abilities / experience when I responded to his ad, deliberately covered his problems up at the first session and now spends his time ducking the fallout by bullshitting me and whining: * "I don't need to know what the notes are on the neck - I play by gut instinct" * "I prefer not to play the original riff. It's more interesting that way" * "A is my favourite key, can't we play it in A?" * "Sure I know how to play that - I can reel it off in my sleep. Er .. how does it go? Er ... can we leave it till next week. Er .. I don't want to do that song, it's not my style" * "No, I'm not playing in the wrong key - my guitar's gone out of tune. It's probably warmed up. Amazing!" * "Is that an E chord I'm playing?" * "I'm here to Rock!" * "I'll be wearing a Stetson with things hanging from it" * "I think I'm holding you guys back, so tell me if you think you want to replace me. But this band is my life, it's all I've got and I don't know what I'd do without it" This is a man in his 40's. His end is fast approaching, or I'm out. The other two are fine - nice guys and excellent musicians. And that's the problem... were it not for them, I'd have walked within 10 minutes. Edited December 7, 2009 by skankdelvar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
foal30 Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 I've had numerous problems with band members complaining about me often it was anonymous musings the trouble was, we were a duo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
foal30 Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 why are you in a band? alternately why do you work? sometimes the difficulties make the rewards sweeter. I realize this can be a fine line. If your in a band because certain parts of this state are "enjoyable" try and focus on them. Conversely make the band experience a template of how the next group is potentially going to function. Bands are people, sometimes. Most people have a level of unpredictability and self-interest. How we mange this could be a mark on what we call sucess Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aznbass Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Ive had a similar situation, but not probably as important as yours.. In a band at high school, which in my opinion was making good music. I got annoyed with the drummer, we used to be really god friends, but when it came to playing, it was always about "i can do the best drum solo ever" ... in a quiet chilled out song and he was very skilled, just kinda excessive, and everyone else agreed, but it was just easier to come by a bassist at the time, so they gave me up and put up with him.. and then the band fell apart because everyone was traveling in different musical directions..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skankdelvar Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 PS: [quote]"Hell is other people" - Jean Paul Sartre[/quote] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAY AGAINST THE MACHINE Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 If you can't get on with another band member,quit! Music is supposed to be enjoyable,not another' job'. My last experience of not getting on with another band member(guitarist,surprise..): 4 strangers (me & three others) all join band together through a couple of ads. We never knew each other. Eventually,the scenario was : singer, rarely rehearsed. Me &Drums get on fine. Guitarist,critical of most of my playing(it made me improve alot tho') Guitarist very quiet most of the time(not a man of words). The thing I did,(because we all joined without knowing each other) was see who was gonna quit first . It was almost me,but I persevered. Eventually ,guitarist quit. Singer hates guitarist,drummer thinks guitarist is hard work. End result :I get new singer,as he 'wasn't available for a month' and me and drummer get new guitarist. Irionically,I have a 'friend' request on facebook from guitarist ,but have iognored as he is hard work. Whatever band I'm in now, if I don't get on with all members,I walk. Life's too short. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
d-basser Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Been in that position before but thankfully I get on well with everyone in both my bands now, not saying they don't have their flaws. It makes the whole process much better and I am much more creative if I am comfortable in a situation. I know this doesn't help you much but if there is any chance you could get into a band with folk you actually like it is hugely beneficial. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cat Burrito Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Yes but not for a while. This is my hobby so I have the rule I have to enjoy it. If it's a big issue you may have to address it but if you can tolerate him than it's no issue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marvin Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Was supposed to be getting something together but I didn't have a clue what material the guy wanted to play. He'd give a vague idea like 'well maybe something like this'. So I dutifully went off found a couple of similar songs, got the basics of them just for jamming purposes by which time he'd be suggesting something else. I just got fed up and said I wasn't much up for the idea anymore. Had the feeling what he really wanted to play was beyond me anyway. I know my limitations hence i fu@ked off. Basically I don't like being arsed about, so I am now in between creative projects. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarah5string Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 I was in a band with my now ex husband, even after we split up. You can imagine how well THAT went. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thisnameistaken Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 [quote name='Sarah5string' post='677322' date='Dec 7 2009, 10:58 PM']I was in a band with my now ex husband, even after we split up. You can imagine how well THAT went.[/quote] My mate was in a band with his wife, even after she started shagging the drummer behind his back. It didn't end in handshakes and well-wishing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
krispn Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Been there and done that Guitarist thought he was great - couldn't bend a note properly and thought he was superior to the drummer who to be honest wasnt that great. Problem was he always talked thrash to the drummer if he messed up and then would say things like 'you and me understand music' etc all the while he was playing in drop D and couldn't tell you the names of the notes he was playing - this song is 9 7 7 5 9 7 5 3 ??? WTF is tht a fone number? This was from the guy who understood music. The best bit was when I made a suggestion to try a riff so I took his guitar (which had the worst set up ever - i actually believe he got it new that way from the shop and never had a set up done on it which is a minus point alone) so he came back to the next practice telling me he had learned the riff and proceeded to play something i have never heard or played before... I tried to correct him and his excuse and I sh*t you not was....'maybe you played it wrong or forgot how your song went when you showed it to me yesterday because this is what you showed me to play. I flipped out and asked him just what type of mental health problem he had that would make him think I had taught him the song wrong just so I could correct him and quickly left the band thereafter! Some people! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Life is too short to waste it spending time with people you don't like. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
budget bassist Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 i was in a band with a guitarist i (and the rest of us) liked, and then all slowly grew to dislike him, we split fairly recently due to a number of reasons, that being one of them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ahpook Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 [quote name='thedontcarebear' post='677338' date='Dec 7 2009, 11:10 PM']Life is too short to waste it spending time with people you don't like.[/quote] plus the one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JTUK Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Nope.. why would you join or stay if it was that bad...? I've cut down doing gigs with guys that aren't reliable in some way.. but then that isn't my band anyway, just a dep kind of gig. After a while, you have large pool of people and you can pretty well cherry-pick who want in such and such band.. I honestly can't recall the last a***hole ( IMO ) I played with but of course, you take to some people better than others.. Mostly, if things get unmanageable, you become unavailable for those dates.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wiggi28 Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 about 12 months ago i finally lost it with the rhythm guitarists in my band he couldnt play in time, wouldnt accept rhythm guitar was his job and kept trying but not sucessfully going into solos at any time he wished we tried to raise these issues with him but he gave the classic answer of "its not my playing thats wrong its everybody else" this statmewnt was followed by lengthy bouts of silence and a refusal to communicate with other band members whilst rehersing and so came the faithful night half way into a session i just stopped mid tune as he went into another of his poor attempts at a unrequired solo . i just put down my drumsticks walked over unplugged his guitar and told him to "**ck off before i smash that guitar around your fu**ing head " he simply wound up his lead and left ,easy as that job done only trouble is hes my cousin so i wont be waiting for a xmas card from him this year still see him several times a week but he refuses even to acknowledge my existence Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheButler Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 I've never been in a band with people i don't like or get on with. I don't see why you'd want to be there in the first place if you really don't like someone.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rowbee Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 I have genuine love for the people in my bands but I've known most of them a long time, I guess I must be lucky. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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