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More Band Drama?


dclaassen

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2 minutes ago, Downunderwonder said:

Hang in for a bit. If they are as crash hot as you say then you can all agree on a version and 1st run thru of the new tune is the penultimate number at the next gig.

 

Drummers go where the gigs are.

 

Better let them know how you feel about having your time taken for granted.

Yup…

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5 hours ago, Woodinblack said:

 

In that case get a gig booked and in the diary for next month

Must be easy to get gigs around your neck of the woods.

 

Not a hope in hell in Cambridgeshire, most venues are already booked up for six months to a year ahead, since Covid, too many bands and only half the live music venues still operating.

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34 minutes ago, steantval said:

Must be easy to get gigs around your neck of the woods.

 

Not a hope in hell in Cambridgeshire, most venues are already booked up for six months to a year ahead, since Covid, too many bands and only half the live music venues still operating.

 

Pretty well same as here, but there are always cancellations or new people in the market. We are obviously booked months ahead but we always get stuff coming through that is short notice stuff, such as cancelations. its worth putting the effort in.

But I think it is an important thing to get out gigging as soon as possible to cement the idea of being a gigging group, otherwise it is just very easy to fall into the 'lets get this perfect, maybe next month we will look at gigs'.

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16 hours ago, Barking Spiders said:

But never forget, footie is better than music!

No it's not.

 

Music is the most advanced form of communication we humans are capable off.

 

Football is a game at best, at worst it is just a way to show off your physical and acrobatic capabilities, in other words a circus act.

 

Of course music can be a circus act too, but not primarily the music I listen to.

 

 

To OP, sounds like you need a serious talk in the band about this, but honestly unfortunately it sounds like your band mates are not as dedicated to the idea of playing in a band as you, and if that indeed is the case nothing good will come out of it but frustrations.

 

Have a serious talk with them about it first though, and be completely honest and frank with how you feel about the current situation, be firm but not angry though, you got nothing to loose really, before making any rash discissions. 

 

Edited by Baloney Balderdash
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15 hours ago, Jean-Luc Pickguard said:

Fuggem. You're not happy. Find/form a band that respects your time better.

This.

 

Time is the thing you will never get back. If they don't have time to rehearse then you don't have time to be in their band. Onwards and upwards.

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Did they give a reason for cancelling the rehearsals ?

If its a valid reason like sickness or death then ok but if its just a call to say its cancelled then i couldn't work with people like that and have walked away from those very circumstances. We all have personal problem now and again and we can't avoid them.

 

Would it be an option to continue with these guys but also look for a 2nd band and see what comes out of it. You appear to be impressed by these guys but technical ability isn't always enough to maintain a good working band.

People either need to be committed to a working band or walk away is how i've always looked at it.

Dave

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Personally I wouldn't be a band with anyone who thinks football is more important than music. I can understand paying work and family needing to take precedence, but watching or playing football is just another hobby (unless you are getting paid to play football) and when it comes to "hobbies" IMO being in a band comes first.

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1 minute ago, BigRedX said:

Personally I wouldn't be a band with anyone who thinks football is more important than music. I can understand paying work and family needing to take precedence, but watching or playing football is just another hobby (unless you are getting paid to play football) and when it comes to "hobbies" IMO being in a band comes first.

Which is why I sold my Champion's League tix Wednesday.......

 

some folks really enjoy going to matches/games. When living in Dallas, the church services would regularly let out early to allow folks to get to the stadium during home Cowboy's games....

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10 hours ago, Woodinblack said:

 

Pretty well same as here, but there are always cancellations or new people in the market. We are obviously booked months ahead but we always get stuff coming through that is short notice stuff, such as cancelations. its worth putting the effort in.

But I think it is an important thing to get out gigging as soon as possible to cement the idea of being a gigging group, otherwise it is just very easy to fall into the 'lets get this perfect, maybe next month we will look at gigs'.

Understand what you are saying here, but cancellations usually come in at just a days notice, these guys cannot even sort rehearsals, so not much chance of doing a very short notice gig, two other problems, they will be under rehearsed and have no drummer.

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19 hours ago, dclaassen said:

I would appreciate the collective's opinion on this...

 

We are putting together a start-up country/Americana band. Great personnel, but so far, (2 mos) we have gone though a drummer (without one at the moment) and 2 guitarists. I have not picked up on any particularly toxic vibes from the BL, but often am too dense to pick up on stuff. Also, the two in charge have cancelled several scheduled rehearsals (day before or same day), which, honestly, bugs me more. I passed up Champion's League tickets tonight to attend a rehearsal that has been called off 6 hours before it was due to start. 

 

So...thoughts? They are really talented, and we could have a great group, but......

 

Thanks in advance...

Give them one last chance before walking. 
 

Tell the band leader that if another rehearsal is cancelled short notice then you will walk. Your time is valuable and the band is supposed to be professional. 

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Also, is there any cost involved in cancellation? Most studios require 24 or 48 hours notice to avoid a charge. If you're using a commercial venue and there is no (apparent) charge I'd be thinking the venue was told in advance.

 

I agree that you need to lay it on the line for them. You have your own standards and you shouldn't compromise them.

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1 hour ago, dclaassen said:

Which is why I sold my Champion's League tix Wednesday.......

 

some folks really enjoy going to matches/games. When living in Dallas, the church services would regularly let out early to allow folks to get to the stadium during home Cowboy's games....

No religious intolerance in Dallas, no Sir!

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3 hours ago, BigRedX said:

Personally I wouldn't be a band with anyone who thinks football is more important than music. I can understand paying work and family needing to take precedence, but watching or playing football is just another hobby (unless you are getting paid to play football) and when it comes to "hobbies" IMO being in a band comes first.

I'm an ex Spurs season ticket holder.  I don't think it's possible to go to matches and also play in a band; too many gigs are on match days.  There isn't enough time, to do both and also go to work.  I chose to drop the football, I enjoy music more.

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2 minutes ago, BillyBass said:

I'm an ex Spurs season ticket holder.  I don't think it's possible to go to matches and also play in a band; too many gigs are on match days.  There isn't enough time, to do both and also go to work.  I chose to drop the football, I enjoy music more.

My wife loves football, and I enjoy going to the matches when I can. We also have season tickets, but this is the last year. Too much faff getting there and back. 

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3 hours ago, dclaassen said:

Which is why I sold my Champion's League tix Wednesday.......

 

some folks really enjoy going to matches/games. When living in Dallas, the church services would regularly let out early to allow folks to get to the stadium during home Cowboy's games....

I was at a Spurs-Arsenal match at White hart Lane many moons ago.  We were winning 2-1 but Arsenal were battering us, Van Persie, in particular, was constantly in and around our box knocking shots in.  The last 10 minutes of the game were particularly painful, we were just hanging on.  I called out to the people around me, "Is anybody enjoying this?".  No one answered but one of the other season ticket holders, seated in front, looked around at me with a really pained look on his face.  We had all paid good money to be tortured.

 

Gigs are better, even if no one dances.

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1 minute ago, BillyBass said:

I was at a Spurs-Arsenal match at White hart Lane many moons ago.  We were winning 2-1 but Arsenal were battering us, Van Persie, in particular, was constantly in and around our box knocking shots in.  The last 10 minutes of the game were particularly painful, we were just hanging on.  I called out to the people around me, "Is anybody enjoying this?".  No one answered but one of the other season ticket holders, seated in front, looked around at me with a really pained look on his face.  We had all paid good money to be tortured.

 

Gigs are better, even if no one dances.

 

I agree. The Arsenal equivalent is for them to have 95% possession, and lose 0-1

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4 minutes ago, dclaassen said:

 

I agree. The Arsenal equivalent is for them to have 95% possession, and lose 0-1

🤣 Arsenal's karma.  Ask your wife what the George Graham years were like.  Arsenal used to have a song: "One-nil, to the Arsenal..."  Known to be really boring but then Arsene Wenger came along and everything changed.

 

Ok back to bass stuff...

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As ever, bands require people and in almost every circumstance people are a problem. 

 

What's the answer? To be honest, I don't really know. You can never control external influences (especially other people) but you can control how to react to them.

 

I reckon it comes down to two choices:

 

Compromise. Accept and be prepared to repeatedly take their inadequacies and foibles on the chin.

 

or

 

Leave and try to find people who better fit your model of the way you'd like things to be. 

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