When I left the band I'd been playing bass with for 13 years (in order to move to France) I flew back three times to dep on drums. All good fun. However, I later found out that when my sax playing brother also left the band, due to musical differences he was told, in the heat of the moment, that they were glad I'd gone as I was so "down" on the performances and always "going on" about wanting it to be better
I never mentioned this to any of the band after it came out as we were all old friends. However, I did get to see them at a pub gig 3 years ago when they were going through their "we want to play real music to real people" phase I walked in the pub in Brentwood, lead guitarist's big moment (Sweet child o mine) see's me, and starts the intro like he's had Les Dawson's hands transplanted on an hour before.
I stayed for the whole gig, catching up with old mates. On my return to France, I had an e-mail accusing me of having given the guitarist "a look" and raising an eyebrow, and maybe it would be better if I didn't go to any gigs in the future when visiting the UK.
I'll be the first to admit that can get on someone's case when things are bad but I don't mean cock-ups. They happen to everyone. Good nights and bad nights. That's live music, but what I can't stand is a "that'll do" attitude when it won't do. Members obviously trying learn a number in the car because they haven't bothered since messing up at last rehearsal.
I'm no Marcus Miller but I know what sounds bad and that if you're being paid, you have a duty to the public and to your band mates to execute it all to the best of your ability. I have no problem with playing for fun with mates and it sounding crap if having a laugh is the only intention. Take someone's money, and it all changes for me.
Anyway, haven't seen them since.