Allons-y! Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 Hello Bass Chat. This is my first post so if I'm doing something wrong feel free to let me know. CURRENT BAND: I haven't been playing with them long, but I like the music and I would probably make more money with this band. We have been playing every weekend and I think my wife gets annoyed with that a little bit. Everyone is over double my age. I've only known them as long as I've been in the band. They are great musicians but do things on the fly. Sometimes upto 1/3 of the set is stuff we have never even practiced. OTHER BAND: All of the members are close friends. It's rock but the members are the same as the praise and worship band at my church ( lead singer is our preacher ). I love the music. I would play less shows and make less money. These guys are all about doing everything right. They leave the guess work at practice. I know this might be odd to ask people I don't know, but I just can't make my mind up. If anybody thinks of any other variables to consider, please let me know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drax Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 Hey Allons-y. Welcome to BC! Difficult to call without knowing your ultimate aim, both have merits. Why not keep both? Sounds like head vs heart, and money often wins. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lojo Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 As above , can't you manage both for a bit longer and let time tell? Be honest with both re first in the dairy gets your commitment though Good luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delberthot Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 I've just gone through a similar quandry I was in a fantastic rock band. We played a few weddings during the year as well but I got talking to a group of guys I had known for years The short story is that we decided to get together to form a new wedding/function band. I'd have loved to have stayed in both bands but the wedding band is just far too busy and it wouldn't be fair on the rock band to dictate when I was free. Otherwise I'd have stayed in both bands Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Allons-y! Posted February 8, 2015 Author Share Posted February 8, 2015 [quote name='Drax' timestamp='1423377228' post='2684017'] Hey Allons-y. Welcome to BC! Difficult to call without knowing your ultimate aim, both have merits. Why not keep both? Sounds like head vs heart, and money often wins. [/quote] The band I'm in plays so offten I wouldn't have time for the other one. we are basiclly a house band for a venue. You are right about it being head vs heart. I'm not sure of my ultimate aim because I don't have much experience with regular gigging. I would love to make more money, but I'm worried I will miss out on a better experience. Do you think it's common to regret playing in a band for more money when you could have played in a band that was into the same music as you? Btw the deference in money is probably £200-£300 a month. I'm not trying to make a living of playing, but I'm not complaining about extra income either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Allons-y! Posted February 8, 2015 Author Share Posted February 8, 2015 (edited) [quote name='lojo' timestamp='1423377888' post='2684021'] As above , can't you manage both for a bit longer and let time tell? Be honest with both re first in the dairy gets your commitment though Good luck [/quote] It might be possible to hang with both for a very small amount of time, but I think I might end up burning a bridge if I had to pick a band I would play with if they both had bookings for the same night. I would rather make it a clean break. (Edited for spelling) Edited February 9, 2015 by Allons-y! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grangur Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 Do you enjoy the excitement of "flying by the seat of your pants" or dou you like stability? Are you good at handling anything that might come? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JTUK Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 [i]Since you can't decide, ask the wife what suits her...[/i] [i]If she resents you potentially gigging too much over [/i] [i]the money that brings, it seems to me [/i] [i]you are left with the band you like more.[/i] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bassman Steve Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 Not sure about a regret. I faced a choice, just after college, of being a full time musician playing functions/holiday camps/cruises or playing the music I wanted to and getting a real job.I chose the latter and never regretted it. Luckily I was a full time player for a few years so it didn't matter in the end. I have also had the great fortune to play and tour with some of the greats and none of them ever asked me what I did before or after a tour. Do what you enjoy most. If that's both then that's great. Just a bit of juggling and first come first served. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Truckstop Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 Go with the first band dude. You're learning a lot by playing songs on the fly and the extra cash is handy innit? Earning money is a valuable life skill. You've got the rest of your life to play music that you love! Why not grit your teeth and earn some money while you can. Your missus might not be best happy, but show her that you're developing as a person and earning money so that you can both have a more comfortable life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bassman Steve Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 JT has sound advice. There's no point upsetting the wife. That can lead to awful problems. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neepheid Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 You haven't said if you're writing songs. I recently decided to slim things down from 2 bands to one and I stayed with the one i was writing for/with, despite the other one being busier in terms of gigs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaveFry Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 Doing stuff on the fly is where the real magic lies . Plus , learn from the oldies while you still can would be my advice . If they are smart they will be learning from you too , so everyone is growing . Priceless . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Allons-y! Posted February 8, 2015 Author Share Posted February 8, 2015 Thanks for the comments! It's going to help me make my mind up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AntLockyer Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 [quote name='JTUK' timestamp='1423383636' post='2684045'] [i]Since you can't decide, ask the wife what suits her...[/i] [i]If she resents you potentially gigging too much over [/i] [i]the money that brings, it seems to me [/i] [i]you are left with the band you like more.[/i] [/quote] Was thinking the same thing before I read this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gjones Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 I'd go for band two if I wasn't worried about the money. I hate bands who have no time for rehearsals and throw unprepared songs into the set. There's a certain age when it gets embarrassing to sound like a school band. But no need to make a decision just yet. Make sure the new band is viable and everybody is committed, before saying bye bye to the old band. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fretmeister Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 I'd go for the band that allows the best musical education. Picking a song on the night doesn't have to be like a school band, it can be brilliant if the players are up to it. Playing in your comfort zone all the time is stagnating. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blue Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 I think your at a disadvantage, in that it doesn't sound like you have been doing this long enough to know what's important to you or what you like. Your younger and for many younger musicians live gigging is not very important. I say, if your looking to grow musically, IMO that doesn't happen in the basement with friends.I think musical growth comes from live performance and a chance to play with guys that have already been through stuff your friends probably haven't. And you seem to have a bigger problem, if you like gigging and your wife is not on board with that, your done. Me, I make it clear to all women I become involved with; [i]" Music and gigging is number1, your number 2 "[/i] It's probably why I'm not married. Good Luck Blue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iain Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 [quote name='DaveFry' timestamp='1423425172' post='2684628'] Doing stuff on the fly is where the real magic lies . Plus , learn from the oldies while you still can would be my advice . If they are smart they will be learning from you too , so everyone is growing . Priceless . [/quote] This is great advice. Learning to be flexible, improvise and adapt will stand you in good stead. Anyone can deliver a flawless performance if they practise indefinitely. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blue Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 [quote name='Iain' timestamp='1423435857' post='2684842'] This is great advice. Learning to be flexible, improvise and adapt will stand you in good stead. Anyone can deliver a flawless performance if they practise indefinitely. [/quote] +1 Blue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dadofsix Posted February 9, 2015 Share Posted February 9, 2015 I didn't see where you mentioned your age, but, if you're in your twenties or early thirties, you've got time to make a mistake or two and recover from it -- just don't needlessly burn bridges. It appears that you'll still be playing with your friends in the church setting and there's value in the stability. But, as a number of folks have mentioned, there's much to be learned from older players who still enjoy what they do and are confident enough in their ability (and your ability) to wing it at shows and make it work. Clearly these folks have been together for a long time. There's a foundation for growth here that I don't see in the other band. ON THE OTHER HAND, "wifey" doesn't like the hours you're keeping . . . ! Good luck!!! :-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Allons-y! Posted February 9, 2015 Author Share Posted February 9, 2015 [quote name='blue' timestamp='1423435023' post='2684819'] I think your at a disadvantage, in that it doesn't sound like you have been doing this long enough to know what's important to you or what you like. Your younger and for many younger musicians live gigging is not very important. I say, if your looking to grow musically, IMO that doesn't happen in the basement with friends.I think musical growth comes from live performance and a chance to play with guys that have already been through stuff your friends probably haven't. And you seem to have a bigger problem, if you like gigging and your wife is not on board with that, your done. Me, I make it clear to all women I become involved with; [i]" Music and gigging is number1, your number 2 "[/i] It's probably why I'm not married. Good Luck Blue [/quote] They will both be gigging and I've actually been playing with these friends of mine on a stage for years. Not In a basement. The band leader is also deep in the music scene. They will be playing less purposefully. My wife is on board with any of my musical adventures. When I married her I decided to put her before everything. She has never told me she didn't like me gigging, but if she did I would drop it in a heart beat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Allons-y! Posted February 9, 2015 Author Share Posted February 9, 2015 [quote name='dadofsix' timestamp='1423441380' post='2684913'] I didn't see where you mentioned your age, but, if you're in your twenties or early thirties, you've got time to make a mistake or two and recover from it -- just don't needlessly burn bridges. It appears that you'll still be playing with your friends in the church setting and there's value in the stability. But, as a number of folks have mentioned, there's much to be learned from older players who still enjoy what they do and are confident enough in their ability (and your ability) to wing it at shows and make it work. Clearly these folks have been together for a long time. There's a foundation for growth here that I don't see in the other band. ON THE OTHER HAND, "wifey" doesn't like the hours you're keeping . . . ! Good luck!!! :-) [/quote] Actually the current band has never played together before I got there. I was at the first gig. I think I worded it weird when I was explaining it. I'm not worried about burning bridges because both bands are very understanding but thanks for the tip. Of course you never know why people will get angry so I'll be careful. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blue Posted February 9, 2015 Share Posted February 9, 2015 [quote name='Allons-y!' timestamp='1423446336' post='2684930'] My wife is on board with any of my musical adventures. [/quote] [i]"We have been playing every weekend and I think my wife gets annoyed with that a little bit."[/i] [i]?[/i] [i]Blue[/i] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blue Posted February 9, 2015 Share Posted February 9, 2015 (edited) [quote name='Allons-y!' timestamp='1423446336' post='2684930'] When I married her I decided to put her before everything. She has never told me she didn't like me gigging, but if she did I would drop it in a heart beat. [/quote] Cool, we all approach music differently and have different values. I was dating a woman for about a year, and the relationship started getting in the way of my musical direction and adventures, I dropped her in a heart beat. Nothing wrong with either decision, no right or wrong. Blue Edited February 9, 2015 by blue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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