The joys of promoting your band on social media to friends

[AizekDon]

I’ve had friends do stuff like that too, meaning well but missing the point. I just laugh and keep posting; the odd comments still help keep the gig in people’s heads.

[12stringbassist]

I have never really expected my former workmates to do much in the way of making an effort to attend my gigs. I guess they saw more than enough of me at work and vice versa. I don't think some of them were particularly interested in live music, regardless of who was playing it, so I was never hugely offended. I don't expect everyone to be interested in the same things as me. Years after I left my old job, it's become an occasional thing for some of them to use it as an excuse for a get-together, organised through Facebook, which suits me down to the ground. It's good to see them and in some cases, have something else to do while they chat.

What's really good is that when some of them see me with a bass in my hands and see exactly what I have been doing on stage, they suddenly understand the long hair that got all those sideways looks and the afternoons I had off to go guitar hunting and all of the gigs that I did that they knew about but didn't come to. It's sometimes really good to shock them with a really tight band that mixes things up a bit and give them something they really didn't expect.

 

 

It's also good when people that I know turn up who are into music and then it's the challenge of doing what we do and hopefully impressing them. It's only a challenge because two of the wheels fell off our wagon around May and July and I have had to replace our guitarist and drummer after 9.5 years. The band is getting tighter and more versatile now.

 

Social media is a good way of gathering the troops - and a lot of my friends were made through being in a band, but I tend not to rely on it for most of my friends as dragging themselves out to watch bands isn't what they all do.

Edited yesterday at 09:09 by 12stringbassist

[ped]

I can’t be doing with friends and family coming to gigs. I don’t want them or me to feel awkward like they have to come or pretend to like it. I must admit I rarely go and see bands live now, either. I’m scared to leave the house in case the TV licence man is outside. 

[SteveXFR]

My favourite one, when I was in a sludge metal band was someone committing on a video that we should switch to playing popular covers to make us more popular 

 

Thanks for that career advice. I always thought disgusting, soul crushing metal that appeals to weirdos was the route to fame and wealth. Id expected to be the new Taylor Swift by now.

[Sean]

A lot of us seem to have the same experiences with this. 

 

One friend of mine has asked me every time I've seen him for the last 32 years how the band is going. "How's band life?" Is his favourite question. 

 

Every time I see him he says that he'll have to come along and see us play one night. He's got no concept. I've been in at least a dozen regular gigging bands in that time doing a vast variety of material, covers, originals, playing different instruments etc.  My response is always the same, "Yeah, good, thanks. Busy as ever." 

 

I bumped into a former colleague last year that said to me that he was still intending to come see me play because him and his lad were such massive fans of the Blues Brothers. I didn't have the heart to tell him that I quit that tribute act in 2007.

 

I go out and see friends' bands and I pay if it's ticketed!

 

 

[TimR]

2 hours ago, ped said:

I can’t be doing with friends and family coming to gigs.

 

Friends often come along. My son is keen (he plays drums) but he's now living and working abroad.

 

My wife has been to one gig since we got married (nearly 30 years ago). 

[Keshtkarm]

I’ve learned to just laugh along and keep posting anyway. Friends mean well, even with odd comments, and the steady support usually shows up once the music starts.

[neepheid]

Friends/colleagues in my experience are a waste of time, mostly broken promises and shaky maybes. I've pretty much stopped bothering, because I take the let down to heart probably more than I should.

[lozkerr]

1 hour ago, neepheid said:

Friends/colleagues in my experience are a waste of time, mostly broken promises and shaky maybes. I've pretty much stopped bothering, because I take the let down to heart probably more than I should.

Same here. I mention upcoming gigs in passing and promptly filter out the 'oh we must come along' response as I ken fine they won't turn up.

 

For similar reasons, I don't hand out compos for ticketed gigs. If people genuinely do want to come along to a gig they'll make the effort to turn up and buy a ticket. 

[Jackroadkill]

On 27/01/2026 at 09:08, SteveXFR said:

I always thought disgusting, soul crushing metal that appeals to weirdos 

 

You rang, sir?

[Lozz196]

3 hours ago, neepheid said:

Friends/colleagues in my experience are a waste of time, mostly broken promises and shaky maybes. I've pretty much stopped bothering, because I take the let down to heart probably more than I should.

 

1 hour ago, lozkerr said:

Same here. I mention upcoming gigs in passing and promptly filter out the 'oh we must come along' response as I ken fine they won't turn up.

 

For similar reasons, I don't hand out compos for ticketed gigs. If people genuinely do want to come along to a gig they'll make the effort to turn up and buy a ticket. 

Yep, often people come out with this rather than just say it’s not their thing. I've even found it with bandmates, with people in one band reluctant to come and see my other band for example.