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How not to impress a lady bassist...


jojobass
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[quote name='darwin' post='217929' date='Jun 12 2008, 09:04 PM']Ha Ha, I know this guy ! He plays with the Groove Doctors based in Ipswich. I have to say that without a doubt he can play, no question about that but what a jerk.

He's part of a incestuous group of 'musos' that jump from band to band all the time trying to re-invent themselves but never coming up with anything new. Ipswich had a big blues scene about 15 years ago and these guys are the last of that (forgotten) generation of musicans.[/quote]

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[quote name='phsycoandy' post='217992' date='Jun 12 2008, 10:32 PM']Sh@t I play in a newish band in the said Ipswich called The Groove Room, we're not all toss@rs I assure u.....how bizzare![/quote]

I was refering to the few blues players left over the late 80's/early 90's, i.e the Mean Red Spiders era rather than all bands in Ipswich today (which lncludes me !) Apologies if this includes you, but the 'better than everyone else' attitude is my (and many others I know) perception of these guys

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Great Friday afternoon read this. All of it.

Big fan. Parody is a favourite of mine.

He's playing the Running Horse in Nottingham tonight. I might go down there. I want to see his crocodile castrating and midget defending with my own eyes. Seeing will no doubt be believing.

Great stuff. Love it. I could dream it. I wonder if Coogan saw his myspace whilst researching saxondale...

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Jamerson was an upright player with lazy right hand- only used one finger- didnt do him any harm.

I think this guy likes to criticise to feel better about himself. Stll I think he should be given the right to reply- someone e-mail him and refer to this discussion.

I think he fancies you and is trying his luck.

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[quote name='thumperbob 2002' post='218690' date='Jun 14 2008, 07:53 AM']Jamerson was an upright player with lazy right hand- only used one finger- didnt do him any harm.[/quote]

I know this is OT but I'd have thought doing what he did with just "The Hook" would make that particular part of his right hand far from lazy :)

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Guys, I am going to offer a different, probably unpopular, perspective on this.

I think the guy was genuinely trying to give some advice albeit in a patronising and clumsly manner. He states below that he isn't trying to offend.

Sure it was out of order but it appears to me this thread has turned into a little bit of a witch hunt with gang mentality setting in a little which I am sure wasn't what Jo intended.

Steve

[quote name='jojobass' post='214361' date='Jun 7 2008, 02:13 PM']"hi Jo caught the show last night at the high barn, great night had by one and all i saw the potential of what your trying to achieve. [b]I don't like to criticize unless i feel it will be positive to a player so please don't take offence as it is the last thing i want to do.[/b] I believe you play upright bass, as your right hand fingering is very lazy and leads to a lack of definition in your playing. Spoons is a very powerful drummer and you need definition and power in your playing to stay with him which you lack. I feel if you address these issues you will have a better understanding of your playing in a trio, which is completely different to playing in any other formation as you will be left lacking when the guitar leaves the groove to solo.
The fact you are female has nothing to do with our ability, to me you are a bass player, end of story. [b]Please feel free to reply in case i don't have the full picture, like i said i don't want to offend, just point you in the right direction.[/b].....fergie"[/quote]

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I'm sorry, but it seems as though this guy must have a seriously inflated opinion of himself. Why on earth does he think it's okay to offer unsolicited advice like that? I suppose it could also be some type of weird "chat up"- I can't help feeling that there is some sort of ulterior motive hidden in there somewhere.... ie. "why don't we hook up so I can show you where you're going wrong"...
Ugh.

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I think he was offering unsolicited advice. I have to curb the urge to do that myself as it's often misunderstood ..
However I still think that was part of an attempt at asking her out ...

So ladies, gentlemen and Jojobass (the OP), how should he have done it to achieve:
Option A ) help her with her bass playing
Option B ) help him with his social life?

Edited by OldGit
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[quote name='OldGit' post='218871' date='Jun 14 2008, 03:32 PM']Option A ) help her with her bass playing[/quote]

was help asked for? if the player, the band and the crowd are happy, i don't think help is needed.

once at a gig between sets some bloke was spouting off about bass playing at the bar, and I spoke to him just to hear what he had to say, and he was going on about how "you got to file those frets down" on a fender precision. I didn't tell him I'd built the warmoth P I was playing that night.
at the end of the gig he turned up at the side of the stage - gesturing for me to hand my bass over for him to show what was wrong with it- or my playing. I scowled at him- he got the message and f*cked off :)

Edited by SJA
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[quote name='OldGit' post='218871' date='Jun 14 2008, 03:32 PM']So ladies, gentlemen and Jojobass (the OP), how should he have done it to achieve:
Option A ) help her with her bass playing
Option B ) help him with his social life?[/quote]
A ) Start by putting what he sees as the positive side of her playing, then what he sees as the problems with her playing, trying to avoid implicitly derogatory or insulting terms like "lazy", then advise on what he thought that she should do to correct it

B ) Say "nice playing, fancy a shag?"

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No-one is stupid enough to try and come on to someone by criticising their playing technique. If someone fancies someone, they will pay compliments, or juat act shy, or try and show off, or whatever, but they're not going to send a critique of their playing by e-mail. You'd send "Hi, I saw you playing last night, that was some hot stuff!" or something.

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True.... but let's face it us musicians are a weird bunch. I know guys (myself included to some extent) that are actually better/more comfortable at communicating through the gift of music than they are through real verbal or written communication. I got a call the other night from a genius guitarist mate that was basically a feverish bombardment of him recounting all his news, darting from one subject to the next in no particular order and back again, then off at another tangent before I got a chance to add my "u-huh's" and "oh really's" where apropriate. It's just the way his brain is wired.

I'm prepared to accept that this Fergie Fulton dude didn't mean to be a cock (although it comes over that way) and probably just used the critique as grounds to set up a rapport.

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[quote name='Ou7shined' post='219787' date='Jun 16 2008, 12:38 PM']True.... but let's face it us musicians are a weird bunch. I know guys (myself included to some extent) that are actually better/more comfortable at communicating through the gift of music than they are through real verbal or written communication[/quote]

Jhonny, can you read me out that cake recipie please? "widdly widdly wooow wooow" "um chucka um chucka do do dooooo"

..... Yeh I can see how that would make sense.

[quote name='Ou7shined' post='219787' date='Jun 16 2008, 12:38 PM']I'm prepared to accept that this Fergie Fulton dude didn't mean to be a cock (although it comes over that way) and probably just used the critique as grounds to set up a rapport.[/quote]

Who cares what he meant to do? If someone messaged me with what seems to be a fair critique of my playing, i'll either reply and make it clear that i'm annoyed, or i'll reply and start a discussion, or i'll ignore it. I wouldn't post it on a messageboard along with my assumptions about who the critique was trying to impress and why.

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Looks like Kharma may have struck.....(a message today off Fergie's myspace messageboard)

Hi Guys,
Sorry to hear about the traffic accident and hope that Fergie's injuries aren't too serious. Here's hoping for good news when he sees the specialist tomorrow.
All the Best!
Cheers,
John (UK)

maybe jojobass should contact them and offer to dep......!

Edited by yorks5stringer
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[quote name='yorks5stringer' post='219957' date='Jun 16 2008, 03:58 PM']Looks like Kharma may have struck.....(a message today off Fergie's myspace messageboard)

Hi Guys,
Sorry to hear about the traffic accident and hope that Fergie's injuries aren't too serious. Here's hoping for good news when he sees the specialist tomorrow.
All the Best!
Cheers,
John (UK)

maybe jojobass should contact them and offer to dep......![/quote]


woooooooooooah
That Kharma stuff is amazing ...

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[quote name='cheddatom' post='219804' date='Jun 16 2008, 12:55 PM']Jhonny, can you read me out that cake recipie please? "widdly widdly wooow wooow" "um chucka um chucka do do dooooo"

..... Yeh I can see how that would make sense.[/quote]
That's assuming he can read out the cake recipe more effectively than those guitar noises, though! Some people can't talk coherently at all. To give a somewhat awkward example, I can't have a conversation with a dead composer, but I can certainly listen/read some of his music. People who don't speak English can listen to my music and at least take something from it. So music is a valid form of communication for some of us!
I actually had a similar sort of discussion with a couple of my friends (a guitarist and a bassist) about whether or not music is a language, resulting in the goal of creating a Bass Dictionary! We got a few words down. :)

[quote name='cheddatom' post='219804' date='Jun 16 2008, 12:55 PM']Who cares what he meant to do? If someone messaged me with what seems to be a fair critique of my playing, i'll either reply and make it clear that i'm annoyed, or i'll reply and start a discussion, or i'll ignore it. I wouldn't post it on a messageboard along with my assumptions about who the critique was trying to impress and why.[/quote]
I don't think it was a "fair" critique. I think it was rude of him. It's started an interesting discussion (you've posted, so you must think so!), so why shouldn't she have posted it?

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[quote name='queenofthedepths' post='220085' date='Jun 16 2008, 06:04 PM']I don't think it was a "fair" critique. I think it was rude of him. It's started an interesting discussion (you've posted, so you must think so!), so why shouldn't she have posted it?[/quote]

I think it's a case of 2 wrongs don't make a right. By posting what this, admittedly, socially inept guy has done the OP has shown herself to be almost as rude as he was. As for it being an 'interesting discussion' because someone has posted, well that's not an excuse for ripping the piss out of someone you don't know on a public forum even if they are as subtle as brick through a window. As others here have pointed out it all seems bit like gang mentality.

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[quote name='yorks5stringer' post='219957' date='Jun 16 2008, 03:58 PM']Looks like Kharma may have struck.....(a message today off Fergie's myspace messageboard)

Hi Guys,
Sorry to hear about the traffic accident and hope that Fergie's injuries aren't too serious. Here's hoping for good news when he sees the specialist tomorrow.
All the Best!
Cheers,
John (UK)

maybe jojobass should contact them and offer to dep......![/quote]

Ah, come on. That's a bit harsh. His email wasn't worthy of a car accident and physical injuries. He's just a bit of an idiot, nothing more than that.

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Well, this tool is certainly getting dragged through the mud. But then, given his behaviour it's not surprising.

I am inclined though to believe he had an ulterior motive. I don't think he would have went to the trouble of writing such a long winded email to a guy he had seen playing (unless he swings that way too). As far as pulling methods go, I think he's picked a pretty bad one here.

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