The realities of being the bass player?

[RAY AGAINST THE MACHINE]

Wrong kind of bass. If it were bright yellow, he would be much more popular .

[Dom in Dorset]

[quote name='Dingus' timestamp='1390152095' post='2341995']
Beat them off with a sh*tty flute and make it part of the act, kind of like a misogynistic Jethro Tull tribute act.
[/quote]
Nice idea as long as I don't have to play a sh*tty flute.

[lowdown]

[quote name='Dingus' timestamp='1390152333' post='2341998']
Do you find being polygamous in Essex much of a problem, Gary? Four wives must cost you a fortune in white stilettos, never mind what the neighbours say .
[/quote]

I travel overseas a lot, so only one in Essex, the other three scattered around the world - The neighbours are convinced I am a MI6 spy,
so know better than to poke their noses into my shoe fetish.

[lojo]

[quote name='skankdelvar' timestamp='1390148647' post='2341937']
It is a T-shirt design.

[/quote]

So who would wear the T shirt, the singer or guitarist need to only if they wish to boast, the drummer is happily married and doesn't need to , the bass player to advertise his availability or the keyboard player to stand up for the cause ?

[Dingus]

I play bass and I get unwanted attention from loads of women . Admittedly, a lot of them are in receipt of some form of community care, but even women who are not living in sheltered accommodation can tell at an instinctive level that I have been blessed with the gifts to make their most intimate womanly fantasies come true . Playing the bass guitar in a such a compelling fashion is only part of it , in the same way that being so good looking and having such great fashion sense is only part of it. . It is combination of many factors that make me so appealing to the collective erotic imagination of womankind, and being a bass player is just part of the overall package, and what a package it is!

[Dingus]

[quote name='lowdown' timestamp='1390153138' post='2342011']
I travel overseas a lot, so only one in Essex, the other three scattered around the world - The neighbours are convinced I am a MI6 spy,
so know better than to poke their noses into my shoe fetish.
[/quote]

Clever stuff!

You are the jazz funk James Bond.

[Dingus]

[quote name='discreet' timestamp='1390152553' post='2342002']
I'm just glad I'm not a keyboard player.
[/quote]

Wouldn't bother me. Elton John and David Furnish seem very happy.

[Myke]

This is so true for me!

Except the keyboard guy I know attracts many, many women! It's his long curly blonde hair that does it.

[TimR]

[quote name='lojo' timestamp='1390153901' post='2342024']


So who would wear the T shirt, the singer or guitarist need to only if they wish to boast, the drummer is happily married and doesn't need to , the bass player to advertise his availability or the keyboard player to stand up for the cause ?
[/quote]

Clearly the bass player to indicate his self effacing sense of humour and only interest in women who have been initiated (or willingness to be initiated) in the ways of the bass

Once initiated they never go back.

In my experience

[KevB]

Being the keyboard player didn't seem to be too detrimental to the likes of Wakeman, Emerson et al in their heyday Seeing the state of some of the women that lurch up to our singer to drunkenly bellow in his ear some request or other whilst he's trying to sing makes me more and more happy not to be a front man these days.

[Fionn]

The bass player in the picture doesn't get the females only because he plays a drab p-bass.

If he played a Warwick he'd be a total flange-magnet.

[The Admiral]

[quote name='Fionn' timestamp='1390244461' post='2343117']
The bass player in the picture doesn't get the females only because he plays a drab p-bass.

If he played a Warwick he'd be a total flange-magnet.
[/quote]

Isn't Flange Magnet available as a pedal from Roland? If not, it should be - sounds fantastic.

[odysseus]

Bass players do it deeper. Couple that with my finger technique and I'm a reg'lar Errol Flynn