discreet Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 [quote name='Prime_BASS' timestamp='1327246418' post='1508266'] ...he is a mahooosive fag. [/quote] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcgraham Posted January 22, 2012 Author Share Posted January 22, 2012 Cheers for the laughs folks, I certainly feel a lot better knowing I didn't jump the gun. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
musophilr Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 FWIW I think you did the right thing. My mum used to be in the choir in the church she goes to (she only quit because of old age), and she describes the choirmaster as being Highly Capable, and one who demands the best possible result. However she also mentioned that he knows nobody is being paid for being in the choir, so while he sets high standards he chooses material that is achievable and encourages and helps the singers to get there rather than leaning on them heavily. Because he's been doing this for several years he knows how long it takes to get a piece of music to be gig-worthy. Therefore he can arrange a gig, an then work towards it. Sounds like the bloke you could have been "working" for didn't appreciate the non-professional nature of his outfit and dosn't kno whow to work towards a target. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrtcat Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 [quote name='mcgraham' timestamp='1327172866' post='1507477'] People like this need to be told to grow up and we need to stop tolerating them. [/quote] Pleasingly it seems that collectively the BC forum don't tolerate tools like this. Some very impressive responses chaps. Made for a very uplifting read lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
icastle Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 [quote name='mcgraham' timestamp='1327242657' post='1508196'] According to him? 4 until i dropped out... officially? him and his girlfriend. [/quote] Four people? Good grief - I had a picture in my head of about 8 people hearing the complaints he's been making. If he can't organise, manage and motivate 4 people - two of whom are himself and his girlfriend, without being a stroppy git then it's obvious who the weakest link is. So he's now just left with himself, his girlfriend and one other person - even someone with an ego that large is seriously going to struggle to get 'em rocking in the aisles (unless gently backwards and forwards whilst dribbling)... You're well out of it mate, ego and talent rarely come in equal proportions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gust0o Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 He sounds like the kind of guy who would be on the losing side in a game of cock-on-shoulder. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcgraham Posted January 22, 2012 Author Share Posted January 22, 2012 What a great read this has been! Why can't more musicians (or people in general!) be willing to have a good laugh and not sweat the petty stuff like you guys? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discreet Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 (edited) [quote name='mcgraham' timestamp='1327242657' post='1508196'] According to him? 4 until i dropped out... officially? him and his girlfriend. [/quote] D'you think the third person will want to stay on now that you've legged it? Edited January 22, 2012 by discreet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcgraham Posted January 22, 2012 Author Share Posted January 22, 2012 [quote name='icastle' timestamp='1327258549' post='1508482'] Four people? Good grief - I had a picture in my head of about 8 people hearing the complaints he's been making. [/quote] Oh I should've explained, he's been through about 4 or 5 drummers in the time I've known him. Each one has been of varying ability, but all dedicated, some of them extremely reputable session guys and teachers in the Midlands area... but oddly enough none of them are 'ever good enough' or are 'so unreliable'. One of them was the nicest guy I've ever played with despite being so gifted at his instrument, and he got a week to put together a 25 song set list with a million false endings and syncopated parts that existed only in the band leaders mind, and he nailed about 90-95% of it at the gig, but all you could see at the gig during the choir bopping and swaying with big smiles on their faces was the band leaders face occasionally being lit up with raging 'effin' at everything that wasn't quite right. Afterwards? just effin and blinding about how no-one was pulling their weight etc etc. This drummer took time out of his working week to learn these songs for no money, just to expand his repertoire, and got abuse for his time. I should've really learned from that experience to leave this guy well alone! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcgraham Posted January 22, 2012 Author Share Posted January 22, 2012 [quote name='discreet' timestamp='1327259452' post='1508508'] D'you think the third person will want to stay on now that you've legged it? [/quote] The 3rd guy is yet [i]another[/i] drummer... who IS a session player by all accounts, but I'm suspect that this is the case, as he doesn't live in the city but further out, AND doesn't own a car... so not quite sure how a reputable session drummer can get by in such circumstances. Given this new drummer has not really had to deal with the band leader for as long as I have or even knows him socially, I say he walks far before the band ever gets going. ... which is a massive shame because this band leader is refusing to let the choir gig (yea, I know, the people who run the choir need to grow a pair and tell him to pull himself together) til he has a band that he is happy with... so it's my wife and her friends who suffer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discreet Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 I reckon it'll end up like this: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcgraham Posted January 22, 2012 Author Share Posted January 22, 2012 Don't forget the black eyes, prosthetic legs and artificial liver. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linus27 Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 Can I offer to poo in his shoes if still required at the party. I can also bring sausages rolls and a can of Tizer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
icastle Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 Well there is one really simple solution that'd keep 'most' people happy. You have a choir who want to sing, you have a drummer who want's to drum and you have a choice between finding a guitarist or a bass player if you can switch instruments... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
icastle Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 [quote name='discreet' timestamp='1327240723' post='1508142'] I like what you did there. [/quote] That's just your mind you sicko... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
icastle Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 [quote name='Johnston' timestamp='1327261787' post='1508571'] Somebody needs to speak to someone higher up the food chain. [/quote] Thankyou for calling Heaven. Your call is important to us. Press 1 for God, press 2 for Jesus, press 3 to speak to a member of our angel department. For all other enquiries please float in purgatory... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcgraham Posted January 22, 2012 Author Share Posted January 22, 2012 [quote name='Johnston' timestamp='1327261787' post='1508571'] 1- Somebody needs to speak to someone higher up the food chain. 2- I assume if this is linked to the church... 3- If he did get the heave ho is there someone else to fill his shoes or would the whole thing collapse anyway? [/quote] 1- Yup! Tempted to drop an email to the person in charge at the moment 2- Good thought but no, it's a community choir. started up with good intentions and is limping on. 3- Long story short the organisers wanted to look after him, and he's ended up throwing paddies whenever they get someone else in to do music... so they stopped doing that... and he throws a wobbly if they even suggest trying to do anything other than what he wants to do... so they stopped doing that too. *sigh* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big_Stu Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 [quote name='mcgraham' timestamp='1327265291' post='1508637'] 3- Long story short the organisers wanted to look after him, and he's ended up throwing paddies whenever they get someone else in to do music... so they stopped doing that... and he throws a wobbly if they even suggest trying to do anything other than what he wants to do... so they stopped doing that too. *sigh* [/quote] Seriously sounds like someone needs to slap his legs & send him to bed without his Coco-pops and no CBBs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discreet Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 Sprinkle him with agricultural chemicals. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcgraham Posted January 22, 2012 Author Share Posted January 22, 2012 Been thinking about it and I probably won't email the person in charge... even though they are a friend too it wouldn't be helpful for anyone, and would be perceived as more childish than trying to fix things. I'll ask my wife to pass on what's happened as the person currently in charge is more liable to tear him a new one than pander to his mood swings Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmccombe7 Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 Just in case I've picked this up wrong. This is a Christian "love thy neighbour" Gospel type band is it not. Does your Christian belief not tell you to be tolerant and forgive. Does it not tell you to love thy neighbour. Does it not teach patience and resolve. Mines doesn't and I would tell him to sod off and get a life. He should have given you direction as to which songs to learn first. Agree rehearsals in advance however i agree with not arranging a gig until the band is ready to go and had at least a few rehearsals to iron out any mistooks. Cheers Dave Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayben Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 That dude sounds like the last thing anybody needs within a 100 mile radius.. Well done you for getting shot of the situation Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcgraham Posted January 22, 2012 Author Share Posted January 22, 2012 [quote name='dmccombe7' timestamp='1327269254' post='1508731'] Just in case I've picked this up wrong. This is a Christian "love thy neighbour" Gospel type band is it not. Does your Christian belief not tell you to be tolerant and forgive. Does it not tell you to love thy neighbour. Does it not teach patience and resolve. Mines doesn't and I would tell him to sod off and get a life. [/quote] [quote name='dmccombe7' timestamp='1327269254' post='1508731'] He should have given you direction as to which songs to learn first. Agree rehearsals in advance however i agree with not arranging a gig until the band is ready to go and had at least a few rehearsals to iron out any mistooks. [/quote] It is a non-professional community choir that performs music falling under the genre of gospel music. It is not exclusive to christians at all, anyone is welcome and many who attend are not, but it strikes me (being a Christian) that it's hard to ignore the lyrical content. As such, it is meant to be fun and encouraging, with a focus on getting better but not necessarily being a pro choir - hence the intended 'community focus'. When he originally asked me to perform he asked me to learn the songs for [i][u]A[/u][/i] concert, i.e. singular. He wanted me to learn them verbatim, no creative input allowed. That, to me, is the equivalent of a chart gig - it SHOULD be scheduled in advance, with concrete rehearsals in place to meet that deadline = not a band. Now, he seems to think it's to be a long term solution, i.e. a band, not a one off gig. However he wants it HIS way, not a co-operative effort, therefore this 'clarification' on his part is also = not a band. Whatever it is, I want no part of it. [quote name='Jayben' timestamp='1327269542' post='1508738'] That dude sounds like the last thing anybody needs within a 100 mile radius.. Well done you for getting shot of the situation [/quote] Thanks... sadly I'm not sure I'm truly shot of the situation. Previous experience of dealing with problem people close to your social circles means it tends to rear its head again in a few months time. I've been tactful so far (i.e. as close to confrontational as you can get but backing off just enough so that the other person would be in the wrong if they were to be incensed by it - I'm good with words ) but I will tell him exactly what I think of him if he wants to make a go of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayben Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 Aha well, surely the... disagreement is purely between you and him? If he decides to try and drag your name through mud because of this then you know you can lay waste to his operation, providing you kept correspondence that proves how much of an arrogant penis he is.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimR Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 Frustrating. You're caught between a rock and a hard place. Has he played many gigs in the past. Sound like he is not confident in his own abilities or is stage shy and just trying to avoid playing live. I'd just get your strongest 4 songs and try to play each one during the church service one a week for a month. Get some feedback from the congregation and see how it goes. Sounds like 20-30 songs is a bit of a tall order. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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