Nervousness

[beyond]

I know there is probably no answer to this but here goes. How can I overcome nervousness. I am new to the bass and at the moment only play to myself in front of the computer, but the minute anyone comes into the room to watch I go to pieces. In my day job I have meetings in top boardrooms, meet and have discussions with all types of people including top celebs etc. and have no problem at all, but the minute I pick up the guitar................. Why is this?

[Jam]

[quote name='beyond' post='996959' date='Oct 22 2010, 12:48 PM']I know there is probably no answer to this but here goes. How can I overcome nervousness. I am new to the bass and at the moment only play to myself in front of the computer, but the minute anyone comes into the room to watch I go to pieces. In my day job I have meetings in top boardrooms, meet and have discussions with all types of people including top celebs etc. and have no problem at all, but the minute I pick up the guitar................. Why is this?[/quote]

It's just practice and confidence. The more you play in front of people, the less you'll care what they think. Perhaps playing with a band will help, do you have any like-minded musical friends? The great thing about being a bass player is that when you gig the only people who watch you are the other bass players!

[Delberthot]

I rmember vividly my dad coming over on Christmas morning when I was 12 to hear my new bass. I had to hide round the corner from him before I could play.

It took me ages before I was comfortable with someone being around me when I played - maybe something to do with worrying that people think you're terrible, being out of your comfort zone or just shy

[misrule]

I heard an actor on Radio 4 a few months ago who said this: "All stage fright is vanity. The minute you don't care what the audience thinks, it disappears."

It's an internal thing -- we worry about how the listener will judge us. We think people out there will laugh or despise us for playing worse than they can. Or we fear we'll cock up and look stupid.

So the answer is to not give a sh*t what they think

We were all beginners once, we all make mistakes sometimes and there will always be a better player than us and somebody less able.

In the end, you're already a better bassist than 99 per cent of the population. There aren't many people around with the skills to judge you.

Cheers

Mark

[the_skezz]

[quote name='misrule' post='997042' date='Oct 22 2010, 01:51 PM']I heard an actor on Radio 4 a few months ago who said this: "All stage fright is vanity. The minute you don't care what the audience thinks, it disappears."

It's an internal thing -- we worry about how the listener will judge us. We think people out there will laugh or despise us for playing worse than they can. Or we fear we'll cock up and look stupid.

So the answer is to not give a sh*t what they think

We were all beginners once, we all make mistakes sometimes and there will always be a better player than us and somebody less able.

In the end, you're already a better bassist than 99 per cent of the population. There aren't many people around with the skills to judge you.

Cheers

Mark[/quote]

This. Best thing is to throw yourself into the music, I find. I both play better and have better stage presence when I just do whatever feels right to me and stop worrying about the audience. It might always be nerve wracking (I'll barely eat before a gig for fear of throwing up due to nerves) but your confidence should improve with time.

[dave_bass5]

Its funny but although I gig every weekend, and feel confident enough to not worry about anything while im playing, the moment we do a sound check through a big PA (and so have people in the room) i go to pieces and my fingers almost feel like they cant move when its my turn.

Very strange.

Edited October 22, 2010 by dave_bass5

[skankdelvar]

I've gigged quite happily on and off for 30 odd years, love the moment of going onstage - get really happy and excited.

But I can't sit on my own and play something to the Missus. Completely go to pieces.

[3V17C]

I've done hundreds of gigs and back in the day I never used to get nervous at all, but the last few years its started getting to me really badly despite the fact that now I'm a much more accomplished player and rarely make mistakes.

I think maybe in my youthful days I didn't care what people thought so much and had a good deal more self confidence in general, but now, being the ripe old age of 41 I'm just more aware and concerned about what people think of me. (i'm insecure at the best of times!!) Normally after a couple of songs i'm fine and get right into it, but its all the waiting around between soundcheck and gig time that gets to me. My nerves are always much worse at smaller gigs too for some reason. The bigger the gig, the fewer the nerves. I think this is maybe down to being more closely scrutinised at the smaller gigs and feeling much better about myself when playing bigger (ie more successful) gigs.

peace

c

[Gust0o]

Confidence comes from practice, Beyond; remember how nervous you likely were when chairing your first meeting? Making your first business presentation?

I know, for me, they're water off a duck's back. I've spoken to rooms of 300 people and not blinked. But I struggle in front of a room of 25 people in a pub?

It's just the practice. Play more; play more in front of people; enjoy it more

[spinynorman]

[quote name='beyond' post='996959' date='Oct 22 2010, 12:48 PM']I know there is probably no answer to this but here goes. How can I overcome nervousness. I am new to the bass and at the moment only play to myself in front of the computer, but the minute anyone comes into the room to watch I go to pieces. In my day job I have meetings in top boardrooms, meet and have discussions with all types of people including top celebs etc. and have no problem at all, but the minute I pick up the guitar................. Why is this?[/quote]

There's a big difference between playing in a band, or any kind of public performance you're prepared for, and having someone walk in while you're practising. The context is all wrong. I don't know if you rehearse business presentations, but some people do, out loud, in front of the bathroom mirror. If a family member walks in on that, it's going to throw you.

[pablyth]

[quote name='beyond' post='996959' date='Oct 22 2010, 12:48 PM']I know there is probably no answer to this but here goes. How can I overcome nervousness. I am new to the bass and at the moment only play to myself in front of the computer, but the minute anyone comes into the room to watch I go to pieces. In my day job I have meetings in top boardrooms, meet and have discussions with all types of people including top celebs etc. and have no problem at all, but the minute I pick up the guitar................. Why is this?[/quote]

There is the old 'imagine the crowd naked' one, but wouldn't it make sense to go out and play naked yourself? Surely you'd be too busy trying to cover yourself with the bass to worry about playing.

In all seriousness though, I suggest you sit down in front of a webcam and record a video on your PC, with full intentions of showing others. You'll screw up in the anticipation that others will see it at first, but keep going, you'll get it how you want. At least you get to screw up in private.

Next I'd move on to playing in front of someone you trust with your feelings. It'd actually be good to screw up in this situation. The right friend will show you how your fears are unfounded, and people actually realise you are learning and will be impressed by progress and not the lack of it. As long as you don't go around harping on about how awesome you are at bass, instead mentioning that you have only recently taken it up, you'll pretty much always get a decent reaction. If you don't, then I suggest getting new friends.

Then I'd suggest playing with others, maybe a duo jam, moving onto a band. Bit by bit.

I wish you good luck.

[beyond]

Thanks for the replies and the assurances. I suppose I've been practicing my day job everyday for thirty years without realising it.

Thinking about it, if someone interrupts my sales patter (equivalent to walking into the room when I'm playing the guitar) or I actually listen to myself, when I'm speaking (equivalent to not concentrating) it throws me all off balance as well.

So onwards and upwards!!!

[retroman]

As far as people walking in when I am practicing, I've kinda got used to it, as I practice in the living room at home. After a while, you just tend to not notice any more when someone walks in. As a nipper, I used to play piano, under mothers watchful eye, so maybe that helped a little.

Sometimes it can help to have someone on the same playing level as you to jam with. Not so much pressure, and you can help each other to learn and improve.

For taking to the stage, I tend to spend a little time beforehand mentally preparing. I'm naturally quite a shy, retiring sort of chap, so my way of coping is to imagine I am a different person, who is very confident. works for me anyway

[Cat Burrito]

Simply put, you are out of your comfort zone. People with stressful / important jobs can handle huge amounts of pressure but this is something different. I used to suffer horrendous nerves when I first started playing but it's now second nature and I haven't got nervous for 20yrs. I just kept doing it which killed the nerves. They went after a handful of gigs. I'm sure if you can handle a high pressure job then occasional gigs will soon be a walk in the park

[Wylie]

I used to act onstage quite a bit, and regardless of the confidence I felt--knowing the part, feeling good about it--my nervousness and 'third eye'--watching them watch me--were strong. But as a previous poster said, when you stop caring about who's watching, what they're thinking, whether they also play bass (ha) and are evaluating you, you'll start to relax.

On a slightly different note, at a recent gig in a small theater, we were behind klieg lights and couldn't see the audience at all, though they were quite close. Felt great. Connected but anonymous.

[thisnameistaken]

[quote name='beyond' post='998366' date='Oct 23 2010, 07:03 PM']Thanks for the replies and the assurances. I suppose I've been practicing my day job everyday for thirty years without realising it.

Thinking about it, if someone interrupts my sales patter (equivalent to walking into the room when I'm playing the guitar) or I actually listen to myself, when I'm speaking (equivalent to not concentrating) it throws me all off balance as well.[/quote]

With respect, your day job is a job. You might take pride in doing it well but unless it's a creative job you won't be baring your soul. When performing music, every nuance of your playing is on show for the audience to judge, and if you're serious it's all coming from your "soul".

I personally really enjoy gigging with a band that's well-rehearsed and I don't feel any nerves at all, but I do start to get edgy if I'm required to do something under-rehearsed or not rehearsed at all. I think it's OK for singers and soloists because they can drift in and out when they feel like it, but as a bass player you need to f***ing boss it.