Happy Jack

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cq8eplxd7yzo

Well if anyone is wondering about the significance of this ancient shop sign (more of a palimpset, really): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lawrence_Wright_(composer)

Lots of great answers above, few of which I'd challenge, but my personal approach would be closest to @Hellzero on this subject. I've been in this situation more than once, and I just ask them back, "Do you want the polite, supportive answer or what I really think?". The easily offended will change the subject at this point, which is fine with me. Those who actually want to know are happy to dive into a deep technical conversation where we talk about high mids and volume levels and guitarists who are complete w*****s.

It arrived this afternoon. Nice enough bag, certainly way tougher (and better looking) material than 20-denier nylon, but not yet convinced it's £330 worth. We'll see. Something that was clear immediately is that it's a very snug fit for the Alcoa, especially over the bridge. Hmmmmm. I can read that as a good thing and as a bad thing.

But ... but ... will nobody think of the Dots? 😱

I'm struggling here. I imagine I've read something wrong, but is the idea that you can convert a longscale into a shortscale just by moving the bridge?

A typical band PA in a pub/club is usually set up to deal with loud rock music, not a guy trying to engage in witty banter, so his mumbling will be largely inaudible anyway. Given that one man's "witty banter" is another's "who the hell is this dickhead?" you're set up to fail if you do much of this stuff. It gets worse. Very few people are natural entertainers, still less spontaneous ones. A line gets a few laughs at a gig and instantly becomes part of a fixed script, to be repeated at each and every bloody gig at exactly the same point, until everyone is sick to death of it. Sometimes you reach the Seventh Level Of Hell, where there's only one singer but everyone in the band has a mic so that they can all take part in the stale, pre-prepared banter. A bit like a badly-read radio script. The audience is there for the booze and the women. Your music is pretty much incidental. No one gives a tinker's cuss that the drummer's name is Dave or that the band comes from Slough, no one is interested in being thanked for coming to their local. Just play the bloody songs.

Current Second Reserve, long since redundant: Is it 3/4? Yes. Is it padded? No. Is it perfect? No. Will it do a decent job as a gigbag? IMHO that's a 'No' due to the lack of padding, but it will do just fine as a storage bag or dust cover. Free to collect during the next week from HA1 3RG.

Current First Reserve, now redundant: Is it 3/4? Yes. Is it padded? Yes. Is it perfect? No. Will it do a decent job as a gigbag? Yes. Free to collect during the next week from HA1 3RG.

Will this de-clutter ever finish? Various instrument sales over the last year have finally removed all of my surplus gigbags for electric bass; now it's time for the DB bags. I'm expecting delivery quite soon of my jolly nice (and jolly expensive) Protec bag for a 3/4 DB which means that my current bag now becomes 'first reserve'. Inevitably, this means that my current 'first reserve' is now redundant, whilst my 'second reserve' should have gone years ago. Life's too short to spend it trying to sell DB gigbags that were never very valuable to start with, so I could just chuck them into a stranger's skip and drive away with a guilty conscience. Alternatively, I could offer them here as freebies to anyone who wants to collect them (NO, I WILL NOT BLOODY POST THEM) and - if they're still here in a week - I could still chuck them into a stranger's skip and drive away with a slightly less-guilty conscience.

After a truly ridiculous amount of to-ing and fro-ing, measurement and comparison, emails ignored or answered uselessly, I've ended up buying: https://www.thomann.co.uk/protec_c313_deluxe_34_bass_bag.htm Will it be any good? Watch this space ...

Oh yes! Roughly 50% heavier on a more-or-less like-for-like basis.

I hate to say this, Tiny, but that's exactly the rapidly-disintegrating gigbag I already own.

Their website currently offers only a 1/4-sized Upright Bass bag. 🙄 https://www.tkl.com/product-type/bags/ Sadly, their website is a bit of a joke. The 'Find A Dealer' section contains more mis-spellings of US State names than I have ever seen before and the links don't work, plus there's no pricing info at all. Apart from that, we're all good.