Think our Band is calling it a day

[JayPH]

So, I joined a band last year. 2 of us were in a band in the 80's and he and the rhythm guitarist have been in a few bands since then but we've all had long breaks. About 15 years in my case. We did some gigs, got the facebook and soundcloud thing going. Recorded some of the tunes to a fair standard and had a lot of fun.

Anyway, the singer has told us he's bowing out. We were confident of moving forward and trying new singers out. After tonights practice me and the LG are last to leave and he tells me he's going to have a good talk with the singer who's leaving and that the band is pretty much over. He reckons whatever happens he wants us to do somthing together. But he aint feelin the love either. Makes me think he might be trying to start somthing fresh with the singer or somthing, maybe I'm wrong.

I don't know what to think but I've put a lot of effort in learning their tunes and recording some of them which entailed a very steep learning curve and a lot of graft.

So I'm a bit gutted tbh. Also feel like a bit of a dickhead thinking we could get the old magic back.

All a bit Creme Brulee It's a sh*t business. What do I do now? Hang the Axe up or join a cabaret band?

[url="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Bbfrn400zs"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Bbfrn400zs[/url]

[gjones]

Creme Brulee! That damn TV show spoiled everything for over the hill, sad, overweight, balding, neverhasbeens who used to be in a band and would get a bit drunk and tell everybody how they came 'this close' to making it...........but didn't (because, in reality, they were a bit sh*t).

I was in that band and we were called Bennington Heights. We came 7th in the sony rock and pop challenge in 1984 and I have a framed rejection letter from EMI, which is my most treasured possession.

I spit on Creme Brulee's grave!

Edited July 30, 2012 by gjones

[WalMan]

I would tend towards persevere, though am going through a bit of a low patch myself at the moment. Allegedly in three bands but nothing much on the horizon, and in a very deep trough of "why bother, I'm / we're clearly cr@p", probably not helped by spending much time mixing and listening back to material recorded in the 80's that I always thought was pretty good, but clearly wasn't as it got nowhere, and remembering back to a happy time when we were productive, happy (there's rose tinted specs for you), and young My low is probably because I am not playing at the mo, and following a r/h that was a bit of a 'mare when I felt that I just could not play, and the two new covers I suggested were pretty much rejected out of hand, I think because of the original artists, whilst completely ignoring the cover versions I was referring to and had shared in the band DropBox. Worked out some keys to go away and learn them up for the next r/h, but I just know that those who already negative thoughts will approach them in that fashion so whatever they will not make it into the set.

Another graduate of the Creme Brulee university weeping into his pint here. Demos & showcases, little TV bits that all seemed to be going great guns, then tumbleweed.

ANYWAY...onwards & upwards. Keep at it, and avoid the cabaret band, unless that's what you want to do of course.

[AntLockyer]

At the risk of becoming your unpaid therapist

[quote]I've put a lot of effort in learning their tunes and recording some of them which entailed a very steep learning curve and a lot of graft.[/quote]
[color=#282828][font=helvetica, arial, sans-serif]Did you enjoy this process? did you only do it because you thought you were going to get fame and fortune or because you wanted to? [/font][/color]

[quote]So I'm a bit gutted tbh.[/quote]
[color=#282828][font=helvetica, arial, sans-serif]A perfectly natural feeling but get your greiving done and focus on what's next for you.[/font][/color]

[quote]Also feel like a bit of a dickhead thinking we could get the old magic back.[/quote]
Dare to dream, a life chasing your goals is a life well spent.

Think about what part of this you really enjoyed. Learning songs? Writing songs? Rehearsing? Gigging?

Now think about what of those you really want to do again, think about how god you felt and how good you'll feel next time. You should then have a plan. Either start a new band (think about how exciting that will be looking for people, meeting new guys, forging friendships), put an ad up in the local shop saying you are available etc.

You've been given an opportunity to do something that YOU want to do, seize it and stop feeling sorry for yourself

[Gust0o]

Grieve then move on.

[steve-bbb]

bell ringing?

[JayPH]

[quote name='gjones' timestamp='1343613961' post='1752743']
Creme Brulee! That damn TV show spoiled everything for over the hill, sad, overweight, balding, neverhasbeens who used to be in a band and would get a bit drunk and tell everybody how they came 'this close' to making it...........but didn't (because, in reality, they were a bit sh*t).

I was in that band and we were called Bennington Heights. We came 7th in the sony rock and pop challenge in 1984 and I have a framed rejection letter from EMI, which is my most treasured possession.

I spit on Creme Brulee's grave!
[/quote]
This made me laugh out loud. There must be thousands of us. And most of us are on here
[quote name='WalMan' timestamp='1343622494' post='1752746']
I would tend towards persevere, though am going through a bit of a low patch myself at the moment. Allegedly in three bands but nothing much on the horizon, and in a very deep trough of "why bother, I'm / we're clearly cr@p", probably not helped by spending much time mixing and listening back to material recorded in the 80's that I always thought was pretty good, but clearly wasn't as it got nowhere, and remembering back to a happy time when we were productive, happy (there's rose tinted specs for you), and young My low is probably because I am not playing at the mo, and following a r/h that was a bit of a 'mare when I felt that I just could not play, and the two new covers I suggested were pretty much rejected out of hand, I think because of the original artists, whilst completely ignoring the cover versions I was referring to and had shared in the band DropBox. Worked out some keys to go away and learn them up for the next r/h, but I just know that those who already negative thoughts will approach them in that fashion so whatever they will not make it into the set.

Another graduate of the Creme Brulee university weeping into his pint here. Demos & showcases, little TV bits that all seemed to be going great guns, then tumbleweed.

ANYWAY...onwards & upwards. Keep at it, and avoid the cabaret band, unless that's what you want to do of course.
[/quote]
Sounds very similar. I could write lots here but I'll spare you. In a nutshell the 2 founding members are struggling for leadership of the band. One guy has pretty much said flatout we would be better doing all of his music. The other guy is getting pissed off with him because he has wrote some great songs. Then I come in with my 0.02p. Any of my tunes get overlooked. Not because they aren't that good. Some are ok and worth a play at least. Tehy are already struggling for supremacy so why would they want/need another ego challenging for honours.

I have put soooo musch love into their music and breathed life back into it for them and recorded it. I am still waiting 1 year on for any of them to play on my tracks. I virtually begged the lead guitarist to play on one of my tunes and he still wriggled out of it. If I'm so good at playing bass for them and arranging their music why would I be completley unable to craft my own tune. I've come to the decision that I too am bowing out after our last gig together on Sunday.

If they cant put an ounce of love into any of my music it's a complete lack of fairness in my book.

Sorry, turned into a rant after all.
[quote name='AntLockyer' timestamp='1343634732' post='1752799']
At the risk of becoming your unpaid therapist


[color=#282828][font=helvetica, arial, sans-serif]Did you enjoy this process? did you only do it because you thought you were going to get fame and fortune or because you wanted to? [/font][/color]


[color=#282828][font=helvetica, arial, sans-serif]A perfectly natural feeling but get your greiving done and focus on what's next for you.[/font][/color]


Dare to dream, a life chasing your goals is a life well spent.

Think about what part of this you really enjoyed. Learning songs? Writing songs? Rehearsing? Gigging?

Now think about what of those you really want to do again, think about how god you felt and how good you'll feel next time. You should then have a plan. Either start a new band (think about how exciting that will be looking for people, meeting new guys, forging friendships), put an ad up in the local shop saying you are available etc.

You've been given an opportunity to do something that YOU want to do, seize it and stop feeling sorry for yourself
[/quote]
Thanks for the kick up the arse. It all feels so much better now. I did not enjoy, at all, being ignored and rehearsing the same mistakes every week. I enjoyed even less having my artistic input completely ignored. It would be ok if I was actually answered but to just ignore somone's input completely on several occasions is not what playing in a band is about in my book. I feel mis-sold because I was given assurances from the outset that A. They would play on my tracks and B. we were equal and everyone would have a voice.

I did enjoy learning how to record music and I can now do that for anybody anytime so that's all win. I shall carry on recording my own music but I shall also involve more musicians. Whether it's people I know or collaborations.

Returning to bass has been the most rewarding thing. God I f***ing love it. Especially my P-Bass. I'm going to carry on playing as long as my body allows.

So yes, looking at it this way is all good. I've learned new skills, had fun, got some lovely gear and basses and best of all, saw right through somebody I considered a friend. The way this indivdual has operated throughout the process has been at best shoddy and at worst disrespectful.

If I ever join a band again I want it up front. Am I playing the bass only or do you want my writing skills too?

As for my buddy, He aint anymore.
[quote name='Gust0o' timestamp='1343737440' post='1754346']
Grieve then move on.
[/quote]
tIs done bro thanks. Just needed some clarity.
[quote name='steve-bbb' timestamp='1343737816' post='1754356']
bell ringing?
[/quote]
I'm alergic to rope

[steve-bbb]

you could ask them for your own personal rope with special non-allergenic manmade fibre covering

[iiipopes]

To quote George Harrison, "All things must pass." I had a great band in the early '90's. It had its life cycle. We're all still good friends. I jam otherwise and perform regularly in a variety of other groups on tuba, double bass and electric bass. I seek and find that "magic" as I can as an integral part of playing and studying as we play the different musicians I play with and match their styles.

Edited July 31, 2012 by iiipopes

[AntLockyer]

[quote name='JayPH' timestamp='1343740935' post='1754423']

So yes, looking at it this way is all good.
[/quote]

Nice one.

[JayPH]

[quote name='steve-bbb' timestamp='1343741688' post='1754438']
you could ask them for your own personal rope with special non-allergenic manmade fibre covering
[/quote]

I see. Bass to bells. Is that the usual career progression for washed out bassplayers? Do you need good timing?

[quote name='iiipopes' timestamp='1343743211' post='1754472']
To quote George Harrison, "All things must pass." I had a great band in the early '90's. It had its life cycle. We're all still good friends. I jam otherwise and perform regularly in a variety of other groups on tuba, double bass and electric bass. I seek and find that "magic" as I can as an integral part of playing and studying as we play the different musicians I play with and match their styles.
[/quote]
Yes it is so. I shall play on regardless and see what happens.

[JayPH]

[quote name='AntLockyer' timestamp='1343743553' post='1754474']
Nice one.
[/quote]

Cheers

Just need to do a little more work then I'm going to try and learn Bernadette and I was made to love her.

[EBS_freak]

[quote name='gjones' timestamp='1343613961' post='1752743']
I have a framed rejection letter from EMI, which is my most treasured possession.
[/quote]

That reminds me...

A colleague of mine is a big time physicist/astrologer type and despite knowing that he didn't fulfill the requirements of being an astronaut (he's not a US citizen for starters), he wanted a rejection letter from NASA to frame and put up on the wall.

They let him down. A printed out email just doesn't have the same impact.

[Gust0o]

[quote name='JayPH' timestamp='1343740935' post='1754423']
tIs done bro thanks. Just needed some clarity.
[/quote]

I know, chief - but you're a good contributor here; a solid player; you'll move on

You'll find some people who [i]do [/i]want your input; who [i]will[/i] listen; who [i]won't [/i]rehearse the same old mistakes - I'll bet you a quid on it

[WalMan]

[quote name='EBS_freak' timestamp='1343815664' post='1755540']
That reminds me...

A colleague of mine is a big time physicist/astrologer type and despite knowing that he didn't fulfill the requirements of being an astronaut (he's not a US citizen for starters), he wanted a rejection letter from NASA to frame and put up on the wall.[/quote]
You did mean astronomer didn't you!? Seems an odd mix otherwise Of course you could have meant psychic, in which case I suspect NASA's reply might have been a two word email with the second one being "off" and he would probably have had the fluence to that effect

Edited August 1, 2012 by WalMan

[EBS_freak]

[quote name='WalMan' timestamp='1343825698' post='1755820']
You did mean astronomer didn't you!? Seems an odd mix otherwise Of course you could have meant psychic, in which case I suspect NASA's reply might have been a two word email with the second one being "off" and he would probably have had the fluence to that effect
[/quote]

Ha yeah! Astronomer. Astrophysics and that stuff.

[JayPH]

[quote name='Gust0o' timestamp='1343816819' post='1755567']
I know, chief - but you're a good contributor here; a solid player; you'll move on

You'll find some people who [i]do [/i]want your input; who [i]will[/i] listen; who [i]won't [/i]rehearse the same old mistakes - I'll bet you a quid on it
[/quote]

Haha You're on Gust0o Sorry for the lateness of my reply and thanks for the lift bro.

[uncle psychosis]

[quote name='WalMan' timestamp='1343825698' post='1755820']
You did mean astronomer didn't you!? [/quote]

The only difference between astrology and astronomy is that astrology makes testable predictions

[PlungerModerno]

[quote name='uncle psychosis' timestamp='1344519503' post='1765849']
The only difference between astrology and astronomy is that astrology makes testable predictions
[/quote]

And has moved with technology and better scientific standards.

Like Alchemy and Chemistry.

[WalMan]

[quote name='uncle psychosis' timestamp='1344519503' post='1765849']
The only difference between astrology and astronomy is that astrology makes testable predictions
[/quote] oh wait....you're winking.