Leonard Smalls

I think that rather than passing thousands of new laws which basically legislate against BellEndery, they should just do it properly and make Unfettered Bellendery And Acting Like A Knob a crime in itself.

wart pigs - black sabbath

Gneiss'n'Sleazy - The Stranglers

Hersham Boys - Sham 69

Insane in the Brain - Prince Fatty

We played at the Victory in Hereford last night in support of Brazilian hardcore punkers, AntiVirus... It's funny because we're quite inyerface, but compared to the other 3 bands, we were melodic pop punk! They were all about onslaught with no let-up which a few metallers in the crowd enjoyed and pushed each other about to which was excellent, but we did our psychedlic stonerdoom song (that's meant to be an onslaught too but our drummer keeps playing it really slowly!) but this time we emphasised the different textures and built and collapsed various drones in weird (and perhaps wonderful) ways - after that we seemed to get a far bigger crowd and maybe 100 people had come in who remained, and even danced about. We'd re-arranged our set so that I started or gave tempo to most of the others so we were quite varied, ranging from oldskool punk to dance-rock to stoner which I quite like - it means we're quite different to a lot of the other bands we play with though whether that's a good thing is another matter entirely! Still, we had the biggest crowd, none of whom lit flaming torches or brandished pitchforks to hasten us on our way. In fact some even said that it was nowhere near as bad as they were expecting despite the now more-numerous bass solos. I had on a rare-as-hen's-teeth Wigsville Spliffs vest with tight camo trews and 5-10 Guide approach boots. Gear was Sandberg Basic - Helix - BBE pre/DBX compressor - Crown bridged power amp - Markbass 4x10. Post gig dram was a fine Arran barrel reserve.

Whip in my Valise - Adam and the Ants

Puff the magic Drag-on - Peter Paul and Mary

Human Fly - The Cramps

Skid-Dat-De-Dat - Louis Armstrong & His Hot Five

Guff Guys - Jerry Garcia

Bang Bang - B.A. Robertson

I have got a wireless doofer, but never use it as it's another thing to worry about! May try again in the future... The actual problem was that I had the amp on the floor in order to lift the cab, and I'd moved my pedalboard so far back so guitarman had room that I literally had only a foots-length to stand in. Which meant hte slightest wrong move or attempted jig would cause me to kick the cable out. Next time I shall carve out my space a bit more!

We were in Worcester last night supporting Old Skool Punx The Samples at The Marrs Bar. We were somewhat under rehearsed - drummer played the 2 songs he started at far too low a tempo. The fastfunkypunky one still worked mostly OK, but the straightahead 3 chord punk thing became something completely different - like a stoner-doomfest where we all had to improvise to make it work and surprisingly, it did! Might play it that way again - left loads of room for me to do ringing arpeggios'n'stuff. And at one point I completely lost sound - rather than stop I reasoned that it was just my onstage monitoring and all was fine out front. Turned out that because I was cramped in front of my amp which was on the floor I'd stepped on the lead., FOH was all there and no-one had noticed apart from me and guitarman next to me! We had a reasonable crowd - maybe 60-70 which wasn't bad considering it was a late replacement for GBH who were meant to be playing... And rather than the pitchforks and flaming firebrands the crowd normally chase us out with we even gathered some more followers and a bloke said I played like Phil Lynott (??last time someone said I played like that geezer from Mudvayne so who knows??) Gear was Sandberg Basic-Helix-BBEpre-Crown Power-2x10 Markbass with lovely new Pinegrove strap who I've just discovered are only a few hundred metres from my work! Shoes were TUK creepers, trews were snakeskin jeans.

Disco Inferno - The Trammps

Year started playing: 1983 Number of basses: 5 Music theory: Did grade V theory 40+ years ago... Technique: 1. Or 10, depending on the criteria! Not many folks seem to play in the same way as me, though that may be with good reason! Groove: Yes. Mostly.

Smash It Up! - The Damned

Cocaine In My Brain - Dillinger

Sorted for E's & Wizz - Pulp

had a rehearsal with the Church Band last night (we're not really a church band, it's just that the vicar lets us rehearse in our local church - who knows why as none of us are at all religious!)... Drums sound great in there though, wot with it being large and Norman! Annoyingly, singer couldn't make it as she currently has no car and being rural, public transport is non-existent (we'd go and pick her up, except she's 1/2 and hour away!). It's slightly alarming as I may have got us a charity gig (our first gig!)organised by a local Actual Rock Star next month and she's only done two rehearsals with us. However, we seem to have got over guitar-man's inability to be funky and his constant pentatonic noodling - now there's far more rhythm and solos actual stand out. I've also settled on a slightly overdriven envelope follower sound on the Helix which makes things even funkier. Not only that, but we've done a blues GoGo song in the style of Trouble Funk, and a Sly Stone style blues.

Some buskers in Philly... Though the drummer is ex-Ornette Coleman, Jamaaladeen Tacuma and James Blood Ulmer sideman, Grant Calvin Weston!

What's a Telephone Bill (when you're in love?) - Bootsy's Rubber Band

Whatever will be, trilby - Doris Day

Talking of wibbling randomly, here's mine... I thought a breakdancing Gandalf deserved something with bass chords and an Ian Dury-style random vocal. Oi oi! Bass and rhythm guitar = Sandberg basic through Helix. Wah guitar = Squier Strat through Helix. End guitar solo by my m8 K, Strat thru Helix. Drums EZ and AG Techno kit. Mixed in Doblies with Ozone 9, mixroom and bassroom.

Deep south style rockin'