How to Quit Politely

[bassbiscuits]

On 27/08/2025 at 10:22, gjones said:

 

I'm in that minority too 🤣

Me too. Proudly so. 

[bassbiscuits]

The first time I left a band I tied myself in knots about how to do it.
 

Ultimately I realised that it’s entirely fair to everyone involved to leave a band that’s not working (ideally giving them a bit of notice if there are gigs booked etc.)

 

But really, it happens all the time and life goes on.

 

If it’s polite that’s ideal, but even if it’s not polite it’s still the right thing to do. 

[chris_b]

On 29/08/2025 at 15:08, dave_bass5 said:

A '👋" text and then block them all 🙂

 

Fired by WhatsApp.

 

I discovered that when I saw I was deleted from the band's  WhatsApp group. The Band leader didn't bother to tell me, but I wasn't surprised as he is a narcissistic a*hole and that's putting it mildly. I have to admit to a certain amount of relief that I didn't have to deal with him anymore!

[AndyTravis]

I disagreed with a decision to slow a song down to half speed.

 

Said the other two were “mad if they saw that as an improvement of any sort”.

 

Was uninvited to rehearsal that week.

 

Then came the “we’re not sure you’re the right fit for this project, no reflection on your playing etc” - so I was really mature about it as a 40 year old bloke with approximately 30 years playing experience.

 

Told them they’d wasted my time, and they could f*** off…

 

And blocked them on all platforms.

 

Because I’m a child.

 

Incidentally heard a snippet of one of their recordings. Boring turd of a track so…

 

 

 

[thodrik]

16 hours ago, AndyTravis said:

I disagreed with a decision to slow a song down to half speed.

 

 

In a stoner doom band this would be a sackable offence. 

[nekomatic]

On 27/08/2025 at 10:16, gjones said:

I recommend asking ChatGPT ,or Grok, how you would write a very diplomatic 'Dear John' letter to your band. I'm sure the AI will come up with something you could use.

Just remember to take out the bit where it opens, “Sure, I can help you write a diplomatic breakup note for a band whose guitarist is a massive bell end and singer can’t hit a note for toffee”. 

[Bassman1974]

9 minutes ago, nekomatic said:

Just remember to take out the bit where it opens, “Sure, I can help you write a diplomatic breakup note for a band whose guitarist is a massive bell end and singer can’t hit a note for toffee”. 

This seems to be a reoccurring theme in amateur bands the world over. I deduce from this repetitive complaint that most guitarists are knobs, and most singers are over confident in their abilities.

[Hobbayne]

On 03/09/2025 at 05:38, Si600 said:

Any update @Hobbayne?

 

Did you go quietly, passive aggressive quietly or are you in hiding after going postal?

 I just told them in a text that I wasn't enjoying it so I'd be quitting, they were OK about it. It's the first time I've had to quit a band so I'm glad it turned out OK.