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Barking Spiders

Crimes against rhymes

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Girls of fifteen
Sexually knowing
The ushers are sniffing
Eau-de-coloning

Great song, but c’mon, Pete. You’re better than that.

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Name the band and song:

Everybody's here 
Puke stinks like beer 
This could be a city 
This could be a graveyard 
You stole my idea 
You stole my idea 
Everybody's anxious 
For the coming of the crisis 
The collapse of the justice 
I can smell your armpits 
You stole my idea 
You stole my idea 
You stole my idea! 
This puke stinks like beer 
Come on come on come on 
Let's lay waste to this century

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Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, Merton said:

Name the band and song:

Everybody's here 
Puke stinks like beer 
This could be a city 
This could be a graveyard 
You stole my idea 
You stole my idea 
Everybody's anxious 
For the coming of the crisis 
The collapse of the justice 
I can smell your armpits 
You stole my idea 
You stole my idea 
You stole my idea! 
This puke stinks like beer 
Come on come on come on 
Let's lay waste to this century

It rings a bell; I've certainly heard someone singing that live recently, probably as recent as this century. Susan Boyle, maybe..? :scratch_one-s_head:

Edited by Dad3353
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1 hour ago, Dad3353 said:

It rings a bell; I've certainly heard someone singing that live recently, probably as recent as this century. Susan Boyle, maybe..? :scratch_one-s_head:

Close.

Or not 🧐😆

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Shotgun by George Ezra is a lesson in forcing rhymes into lyrics.

The first line is "Homegrown alligator, see you later" and it doesn't get any better from there.

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Posted (edited)

And from possibly the greatest English lyricist of the 80s, our Billy gives us:

All my friends from school, Introduce me to their spouses

While I'm left standing here, with my hands down the front of my trousers

Edited by Nicko
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Half Man Half Biscuit could rock the ant-rhyme with the best of them,

Reflections in A Flat

Oh darling sugar honey
When it was nice and sunny
And when I had some money
We would go and see Echo And The Bunny
…men

Since I was eight I’ve loved you
Through garden gates I’ve shoved you
Then there’s the time I slashed you
And you had to go to hospital

Now you are gone forever
Shot by your Uncle Trevor
My story seems so tragic
Ali Bongo’s good at contortionism

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Not a rhyme but a scansion issue. Tyrannosaurus Rex, "Child Star" - to make the lines "Debussy and Mendelssohn, Handel and Dvorak of old" fit, Marc Bolan sings "Dvorak" as "devorack".

In "Ballrooms of Mars", he just gives up completely, apart from a desultory "stars/Mars" rhyme halfway through. "Telegram Sam" has "Sam/man" and "Slim/been" (in mitigation, he sings "been" as "bin").

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As much as I love them, this one always sticks out - a Paul Stanley lyric from 'C'Mon and Love Me' by KISS - 

'You were distant

Now you're nearer

I can feel you face 

Inside the mirror.'

 

Oy vey.

 

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29 minutes ago, tauzero said:

Not a rhyme but a scansion issue. Tyrannosaurus Rex, "Child Star" - to make the lines "Debussy and Mendelssohn, Handel and Dvorak of old" fit, Marc Bolan sings "Dvorak" as "devorack".

In "Ballrooms of Mars", he just gives up completely, apart from a desultory "stars/Mars" rhyme halfway through. "Telegram Sam" has "Sam/man" and "Slim/been" (in mitigation, he sings "been" as "bin").

Marc Bolan turned crimes against rhymes into an art form, the list is endless "I've got a Rolls Royce because it's good for my voice" for some reason they seemed to work though or maybe we just got used to them 

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Posted (edited)
On 06/04/2021 at 17:04, MrCrane said:

Tom Lehrer always managed to rhyme with a certain amount of style.

"I say a bygone should be a bygone

Let's make peace the way we did in Stanleyville and Saigon"

And he's got a few more examples in this one.

https://youtu.be/YN0qvNhtGhM?t=13

The rhyming of  "Te Deum" with "ICBM" is a particularly wonderful work of genius.

Edited by MrCrane

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