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Things not to do in a music shop........


T-Bay

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I try not to play anything that might look like showing off as i personally hate to hear guys doing that when i'm in looking. Usually some scales across the neck, few quick licks with some harmonics or unusual style thrown in depending on how i'm feeling that day and never play too loud unless i'm testing an amp or cab where i want to check at a reasonable volume.

On that i don't think i've ever actually upset anyone. Have even been asked to join bands while testing out basses.

Dave

Edited by dmccombe7
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44 minutes ago, AndyTravis said:

I seem to play “Behind The Lines” off Face Value by Phil Collins...

But I used to work in a guitar shop...and there are some great stories from the 11/12 years I did that job. 

Come on then, give us a few (so to speak)

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8 minutes ago, T-Bay said:

Come on then, give us a few (so to speak)

My favourite was a guy who bought an Epi 335 and a lead to go with it.

Came back in complaining his new electric guitar didn’t work.

he’d gone home and somehow wired a household plug onto the end of his newly acquired cable...

he’d been plugging it into the mains.

how he didn’t die I’ll never know.

 

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1 minute ago, AndyTravis said:

My favourite was a guy who bought an Epi 335 and a lead to go with it.

Came back in complaining his new electric guitar didn’t work.

he’d gone home and somehow wired a household plug onto the end of his newly acquired cable...

he’d been plugging it into the mains.

how he didn’t die I’ll never know.

 

Jesus, are people still doing that after nearly 70 years of mass market electric guitars? 

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I usually play different stuff to see how the bass responds, so some double-stops up the dusty end and also seeing how comfortable the bass is to play. They never have straps on them, which I find annoying cos I rarely play sat down.

Last time I tried a bass in a shop I played Pump it Up by Elvis Costello over and over and got some funny looks from the sales guy. I then found the same bass cheaper and with a hard case on eBay and bought it (I know, I'm going to hell just for that).

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Things not to do? Any of these:

  1. Criticise their woefully inadequate range of bass guitars, and even more limited selection of amplification.
  2. State that you like an instrument you've been trying - next thing you know they are taking it to the till and trying to upsell you some accessories.
  3. Mention the expensive axes you already own - a keen salesman will take this as a personal challenge to find you something from the Squier or Vintage ranges that will blow it out of the water.
  4.  Enquire whether a lower price might be available for cash (actual folding money) - the days of shops buying and selling in paper money are pretty much gone, they almost all have card facilities, and it can actually cost them more to bank cash than to take a payment on a debit card.
  5. Offer an existing instrument as trade-in - you'll get a better price from the first low-ball Gumtree chancer that comes along than from a retailer.
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7 hours ago, paul_5 said:

My first thought after reading the thread title was ‘defecate in the corner’. 

I think I need to speak my therapist 🤭

If you're going to do it, I think in the corner is the most considerate place. 

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Happened upon a homeless gent taking a wazz at the side of the shop.

”sorry lad, when you gotta go, ya gotta go!”

he then proceeded follow me in and started to strum an ibanez acoustic bass randomly singin “ahm sorreh I whizzed outside yer shop, me life’s a fuggin mess, forgive meh” for about 20 minutes.

looking back it was f*cking tragic at times that place.

Edited by AndyTravis
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15 hours ago, skankdelvar said:

Jesus, are people still doing that after nearly 70 years of mass market electric guitars? 

Unbelievable indeed. I searched the web for a compact jack-to-mains adapter, AND FOUND NONE AT ALL!  :o

You'd think that they'd have come up with a patent that is simple and cheap but still well-built enough to take a current worthy of a Darwin Award.

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Generally sound like you know what you're talking about. This is the equivalent of going to your doc and reeling off a number of medical conditions you've been able to rule out with confidence before he tells you how irritated he his with people who use webMD for self diagnosis. Both GPs and music shop staff want you to be ignorant and at the mercy of their expertise.

Edited by Barking Spiders
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I wish i'd seen this thread earlier, i've just come back from a music shop where the first thing i did was light up my trusty crack pipe, then I started morris dancing, and in the excitement i shät myself, and with all the energetic morris dancing it sprayed all over the equipment in the shop. When the staff tried to stop me, they took me by surprise and I accidentally assaulted them by throwing excrement at them. 

It all worked out in the end though because I apologised and purchased 1 used plectrum for 9p.

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I usually start by being highly specific about the precise combination of amp and cab(s) that I want to play the bass of my choice through. I then take the cables off the guy and wire it up myself, all the while pointing out why I've chosen this specific setup, and the failings of the other gear they have in stock, and why I won't use any of it.

After that, staff and punters alike usually f-off and leave me in peace to play.

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10 minutes ago, Dan Dare said:

Things not to do in a music shop? Don't be a know-it-all tw*t...

Oh, come on - that's half the fun! At least that way you can find out if the staff really know anything. If they do, you can have an interesting conversation, if not, they'll definitely leave you alone...

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5 hours ago, project_c said:

I wish i'd seen this thread earlier, i've just come back from a music shop where the first thing i did was light up my trusty crack pipe, then I started morris dancing, and in the excitement i shät myself, and with all the energetic morris dancing it sprayed all over the equipment in the shop. When the staff tried to stop me, they took me by surprise and I accidentally assaulted them by throwing excrement at them. 

It all worked out in the end though because I apologised and purchased 1 used plectrum for 9p.

Well I think you were very lucky to have gotten away with that! If I was the proprietor of a musical instrument retail establishment there is no way I would have tolerated morris dancing on the premises I can tell you! :angry2:

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