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So I gave a band member both barrels..............


police squad
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'See you all next Saturday at the Railway Bell' I said to the boys as we were about to leave our gig last Saturday.

'Our next gig is in November' says the drummer.

'No it's Saturday' I say.

He gets his phone out and shows me the website. I've forgotten to put it on the website.

'Oh F&&k it, I'll cancel it, sorry boys it looks like it's my fault' I said even though I know when I booked it I had notified everybody.

Anyway, I checked it all out in the morning and sure enough, on our Facebook messenger chat page, I had announced it in April and was greeted by the 'thumbs up' by the drummer.

This is not the first time he has messed up his diary. He's 30, has a degree in music and is head of maths, where he teaches.

I was less than polite about it, because I have better things to do than constantly change things, arrange deps .

Me
[color=#FFFFFF][font=Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif][size=3]I[/size][/font][/color]I've just checked back thru this message board and I can see that I did mention about the gig this saturday 30th at The railway bell, dover. Ross, you even gave the thumbs up. So I missed putting it on the website, which is my fault. But I did tell people. I didn't text alex, because he sometimes checks in here and hardly ever acknowledges my texts about dates. I am utterly fed up with this. I'm going to cancel saturday because I cannot be bothered to sort it out. I have better things to do than f&&k about with people that can't write things in their diary[color=#FFFFFF][font=Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif][size=3]'ve just checked back thru this message board and I can see that I did mention about the gig this saturday 30th at The railway bell, dover. Ross, you even gave the thumbs up. So I missed putting it on the website, which is my fault. But I did tell people. I didn't text alex, because he sometimes checks in here and hardly ever acknowledges my texts about dates. I am utterly fed up with this. I'm going to cancel saturday because I cannot be bothered to sort it out. I have better things to do than f*** about with people that can't write things in their diary[/size][/font][/color]
[color=#FFFFFF][font=Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif][size=3], you even gave the thumbs up. So I missed putting it on the website, which is my fault. But I did tell people. I didn't text alex, because he sometimes checks in here and hardly ever acknowledges my texts about dates. I am utterly fed up with this. I'm going to cancel saturday because I cannot be bothered to sort it out. I have better things to do than f&&k about with people that can't write things in their diary[/size][/font][/color]

Him
[color=#4B4F56][font=Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif][size=3]I said yes back in April however as it wasn't on the calendar didn't realise it was confirmed. Just a big misunderstanding but If that's the way you feel - find another drummer, as I will not play with someone who speaks to me that way. Cheers[/size][/font][/color]


As I said, he is always messing his diary up. He never gives me dates he can't do, until I book something.


Was I too harsh? Probably but my job is very demanding and running a band (as many of you know) is a thankless task.

Anyone else have this kind of thing?
Currently looking for a new drummer :D

Edited by police squad
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Dealing with some people on dates/organising is worse than pulling teeth. Our guitarist in an old band of mine was dreadful. Wouldn`t reply to texts/e-mails etc as was "too busy", but funnily enough always had time to post on facespace about what he`d had for breakfast, or how many times he`d had a number 2 that day. Sometimes he would send us a message confirming he was available for a gig, but the message would be sent after the date of the proposed gig.

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[quote name='hiram.k.hackenbacker' timestamp='1506435516' post='3378705']
Also, 'changing things and arranging deps' may prove to be less onerous than finding a replacement drummer.

I would contact him and exchange apologies.
[/quote]

I've updated my original post, as what I said didnt come out.
It is very harsh,

BUT, in all my time in bands (over 30 years now), I put a date in the diary and it is IN the diary.
if I detect an anomaly, such as 'not on the website' I flag it up and check with someone.

I organise this band because the previous incumbent passed away two years ago. He told me the drummer was an absolute nightmare, in this regard and he has proved to be right.

I won't apologize because, apart from my use of the F word, he has let me down again.

I have the gig covered.
It's a shame because he is actually a very good drummer (even though he doesn't really listen to the bass) and a lovely bloke.

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[quote name='hiram.k.hackenbacker' timestamp='1506437020' post='3378723']
Just playing Devil's Advocate, if you know you have someone in the band who is that disorganised, I would be on his case continuously.

That said, if he's going to run away after having one f*** put into him, an indirect one at that, he's probably not the sort of person I would want in my band tbh.
[/quote]

agreed, I'm just after opinions really.

He's supposed to be a grown up. I shouldn't have to constantly ask him his availability. If I decided I couldn't do a gig and let everyone down, he wouldn't like it.



Personally I'm glad he's left. Every time I call a song, he whinges about it etc.

I think, actually, that he was maybe looking for an excuse to leave.

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It's a tricky one.

I used to gig in a band that kept getting offered possible gigs, half of which came to nothing, but i still had the dates pencilled in my diary.

If availability for a gig was checked a few months ago, but not mentioned at all since then, i can understand why someone might think that the gig wasn't confirmed.

Not saying that's right, just that its quite an easy mistake for your drummer to make.

A communication problem more than anything else by the sound of it.

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We only found out we were playing Oct 20th by pure chance this Saturday! We have 2 lead guitarists but only one plays at any one time (odd setup really but...). One of them had asked us if we wanted to play on the 20th but never got back to confirm anything.

Luckily, a friend of mine showed me the poster online and I managed to get everyone (that includes the other guitarist, not the one who organised it to play). The lad who organised it cant make it!

Communication is easy but organisation is terrible. I've got a brand new unused BF rig under my stairs as I haven't been able to get 5 folk in the same room for the last 2 months!

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Tbh I think I'm with the drummer, "you mentioned" the gig in April, nothing else since and it's not on the band's website.

I've got an issue with the "dates you can't do" thing too, our guitarist wanted us to give him all the dates we can't do rather than him check for each gig but he's not my dad, if I've got no gig next weekend and I book a weekend away that's my lookout, I'm not going to update my personal free time diary with him on a daily basis as things come up, booked holidays of course no problem and times you already know are out to save checking every time but not my personal free dates for him to book what he likes.

Ah bands :D

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[quote name='stingrayPete1977' timestamp='1506440731' post='3378767']
Tbh I think I'm with the drummer, "you mentioned" the gig in April, nothing else since and it's not on the band's website.


[/quote] I would have had sympathy with the drummer, but the rest of the band seem happy, so there seems to be other reasons to me.

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If someone mentions a gig to me, I put it on my diary with a ? next to it.

If something else comes up I query it with the rest of the band.

It's not hard. In the old days we used to call it 'pencilling it in'.

Actually, that's what I still call it, and do the same for all unconfirmed social and work events. :D

.

Edited by TimR
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[quote name='TimR' timestamp='1506442670' post='3378785']
If someone mentions a gig to me, I put it on my diary with a ? next to it.

If something else comes up I query it with the rest of the band.

It's not hard. In the old days we used to call it 'pencilling it in'.

Actually, that's what I still call it, and do the same for all unconfirmed social and work events. :D

.
[/quote]

Likewise, that said I had to dep out my first ever gig with my current band to play a charity gig for free after my own screw up!

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[quote name='stingrayPete1977' timestamp='1506440731' post='3378767']

I've got an issue with the "dates you can't do" thing too, our guitarist wanted us to give him all the dates we can't do rather than him check for each gig but he's not my dad, if I've got no gig next weekend and I book a weekend away that's my lookout, I'm not going to update my personal free time diary with him on a daily basis as things come up, booked holidays of course no problem and times you already know are out to save checking every time but not my personal free dates for him to book what he likes.

[/quote]

Sorry mate, can't agree with you on this.

In my main band (Junkyard Dogs) the majority of gigs are got by me & Silvia working our tits off. The band's availability calendar is the 'Free' tab on the Lemonrock site: https://www.lemonrock.com/junkyarddogs?page=diary

All we ask the rest of the band is that they keep us informed through that page which dates the band is ALL available to play.

If two visits, several pints, and some not very good over-priced food has finally got us to the point where the landlady has opened the her Event Diary and offered us dates, I am NOT about to say: "[i]Well give me a bunch of dates and I'll check which ones we can play, I'll maybe get back to you tomorrow[/i]."

The only people who ever think that situation is acceptable are those who never bother to get gigs but leave it all to someone else.

Harsh, but true.

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But how do you know if your free? I know when I'm not free so that's fine I can tell you that.

Whatsapp group, "gig on date x everyone free?" yes or no gets replied to quick enough.

I've got too many hobbies which could result in a last minute booking to clear my diary for the band.

Edited by stingrayPete1977
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If it's any help, our band use a Google Calendar shared between us all. If it is in the calendar, the gig is booked. Any dates people can't do are in the diary too, but when a gig is to be booked there is a WhatsApp discussion. It's something we just do and have gotten used to having a chat about..well, everything and wise really.

A second layer of checking is that it's on our website. In case of technical problems, I use IFTTT to add the dates to another non-Google calendar that I view daily.

This may seem over the top, but we are deadly serious about being a great band that people will want to book.

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I do all the bookings for my band (The Wirebirds), and we also use a shared Google diary. This world well so long as people remember to enter dates they can't do into the diary or tell me about them so I can do that for them. Our guitarist is going home for Christmas this year (he hasn't been back for many years - home is one of the most remote places of habitation on the planet!) and I arranged gigs up the date he was departing, A few days ago he told me the departure date has been brought forward a week, so that's two bookings I need to cancel, but as they are still months away, it's not a big problem. Nothing really causes issues within the band as we all manage to get along well together (except for one bloke, but we kicked him out a few years ago!).

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Kinda torn on this one. Can see that the drummer might feel it was all a bit vague and the response was a bit harsh... but as I'm currently dealing with someone who is extremely disorganised in a slightly different (though musical) setting... I feel your pain.

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[quote name='The59Sound' timestamp='1506445554' post='3378825']
To be honest, if someone spoke to me like that then I would quit too. Yes he was disorganised but no need to treat him like a piece of crap.
[/quote]

Reading the email the OP posted again I tend to agree, I think I'd be off and I think his reply was quite reasonable too.

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