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Metallica - off to never never Glastonbury land


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Guest bassman7755

[quote name='RhysP' timestamp='1399745388' post='2447297']
I thought the reason acts go down well at Glastonbury (or any big festival these days) is that basically the sort of people who go to these things basically don't give a f*** who's playing, they'll jump around & whoop & cheer to absolutely anything because it's about being there & being able to bore everybody shitless for months about what a "great experience" you had there rather than the music.
[/quote]

To me Glastonbury was the harbinger or death to "proper" festivals (a proper festival being defined as 10-20 rock/metal bands playing back to back ...).

Edited by bassman7755
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jgmh, you need to learn how to properly quote other people's posts in your own, because I can'[t quote you quoting me to respond to your point. :)

Anyhow, I think the black album was Metallica's finest hour, but I am not a dedicated fan of the band, as you may have already guessed. There were some really imaginative and well-crafted songs on that album , and, most importantly, it was accessible. By contrast, the rest of their catalog is, by-and-large, pretty stolid and impenetrable to most casual listeners. That black album heralded a new era in that genre of music , coming out as it did at the very time when metal was looking for a new direction after all those monstrous hair metal bands. That was Metallica's finest hour, and they have been trading on the success of that record ever since.

I am sure liking heavy metal doesn't make you socially retarded in itself, but Metallica do seem to appeal to a disproportionately large number of electronic engineering students who wear their keys on a fob attached to their belt loops,

I grew up liking heavy rock music, and I am indeed severely socially retarded as a direct result. If you give a twelve year old boy a Judas Priest album and a bottle of cider and leave him to get on with it you are unlikely to get a good long- term outcome. I am living proof of that social experiment. That is why I am on my own , up at five am typing bollocks about Metallica when I don't even like them . If I had listened to something a bit more mainstream when I was younger then I might have been on an exotic holiday with Martine McCutcheon right now, or something along those lines

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[quote name='Dingus' timestamp='1399784821' post='2447553']
jgmh, you need to learn how to properly quote other people's posts in your own, because I can'[t quote you quoting me to respond to your point. :)

Anyhow, I think the black album was Metallica's finest hour, but I am not a dedicated fan of the band, as you may have already guessed. There were some really imaginative and well-crafted songs on that album , and, most importantly, it was accessible. By contrast, the rest of their catalog is, by-and-large, pretty stolid and impenetrable to most casual listeners. That black album heralded a new era in that genre of music , coming out as it did at the very time when metal was looking for a new direction after all those monstrous hair metal bands. That was Metallica's finest hour, and they have been trading on the success of that record ever since.

I am sure liking heavy metal doesn't make you socially retarded in itself, but Metallica do seem to appeal to a disproportionately large number of electronic engineering students who wear their keys on a fob attached to their belt loops,

I grew up liking heavy rock music, and I am indeed severely socially retarded as a direct result. If you give a twelve year old boy a Judas Priest album and a bottle of cider and leave him to get on with it you are unlikely to get a good long- term outcome. I am living proof of that social experiment. That is why I am on my own , up at five am typing bollocks about Metallica when I don't even like them . If I had listened to something a bit more mainstream when I was younger then I might have been on an exotic holiday with Martine McCutcheon right now, or something along those lines
[/quote]

These posts are brilliant!

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I saw Metallica on the..."And Justice for All" tour in Birmingham back in the day. To say that they were sloppy wouldn't do it (gulp) justice. The much maligned Kirk Hammett was truly awful. By comparison the "Clash of the Titans", with Slayer/Megadeth topping the bill, and Testament and Suicidal Tendencies in support, was amazing. Metallica, IMO, began as a force to be reckoned with, but then became a victim of their own ego and hype. If you drench a fart in wah wah it's still a fart.

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It's stupid they've been booked and the headliners are weak but you don't go to Glastonbury knowing what's on anyway, you've got to hope for the best when you buy the ticket. There are 200+ other acts on so I'm sure those of us going who would rather take a pickaxe to the head than to see Metallica will find something different to do.

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[quote name='Dingus' timestamp='1399748551' post='2447320']
Yes, the audience tend to be the kind of people who believe that Britpop was a significant historical event and " Run " by Snow Patrol is indeed The Soundtrack of Their Lives, just like the advertised-on -t.v indie compilation album tells them it should be.
[/quote]

I'm more of a Chasing Cars social mistfit and general retard myself.


Not really, but I think that was a tad harsh. If everybody liked the same thing what a dull world we would inhabit.

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People go to Glastonbury because it's the trendy event to go to. Most of them don't care which bands are on , it's all about wearing a comedy hat , painting your face , sticking up a bloody huge flag and getting up on someones shoulders to try and get on telly for a nano second.
The festivals I used to go to were quite different. Anyone blocking the view with a flag or sitting on someones shoulder would result in a barrage of piss filled bottles or any other object thats around.
The bands were all decent names of the time instead of the current V/Glasto etc lineups of bland indie dross who have no idea about stage presence or performance.
Most of these bands can get away with a 30 minute festival slot but would struggle headlining a tour of there own. Imagine Scouting for Girls doing the same size gigs Metallica play ??
Anyway , I don't know where I'm going with this to be honest...I'm sure Metallica will go down well , as will most bands at Glasto...lapped up by the "I was there , look at me" crowd....
Bloody hell I'm sounding old and grumpy...!!

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I watched Metallica:Through the Never today and really enjoyed it. What an amazing stage show and I loved the story that was cut into it and the fact that just like in Pulp Fiction you never actually find out what the McGuffin is. Yes, it was cheesy but a fabulous production nonetheless; this is entertainment after all. I'm glad they're doing Glastonbury and I'm really glad some bland rubbish British band with a strictly root note bass player isn't headlining :-D

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[quote name='Dingus' timestamp='1399748551' post='2447320']
Yes, the audience tend to be the kind of people who believe that Britpop was a significant historical event and " Run " by Snow Patrol is indeed The Soundtrack of Their Lives, just like the advertised-on -t.v indie compilation album tells them it should be.

I am struggling to see why whatever Metallica do is such a cause for controversy, considering they don't do anything remotely controversial. They are a thick-as-two-short-planks heavy metal band who churn out one dreadful racket after another for an adoring audience consisting largely of the socially retarded. Presumably it is the absence of any real drama or controversy in that scenario that compels their followers to create it. The irony is that Metallica as an entity are quite devoid of controversy because, to be brutally honest, they lack the wit to create any. They just aren't that kind of a band. They make very conservative and predictable music for a very conservative and predictable audience.

As far as that kind of sweaty, grinding rifferama goes, I'm sure that Metallica at the top of the pile for aficionados , but in their entire career they have made about forty five minutes worth of worthwhile music, most of which is the black album . The more commercial tracks on that L.P were superb, everything they did before or since is disappointing by comparison.

Why should anyone care less or be shocked and surprised if Metallica play Glastonbury ? Their music and their whole act is a commercial proposition just like the rest of the bands on the bill. They put on a show for money. The difference between Metallica and Coldplay is essentially the same degree of difference as there is between a tin of baked beans and a tin of Spaghetti hoops. I'm sure they will go down a storm with the festival goers at Worthy Farm. They are tailor-made for that kind of event.
[/quote]

I wouldn't comment on a genre of music I knew nothing about. I would definately not make negative sweeping generalisations about the fans of this genre. I find most of your post offensive but I'm assuming it was intended to be humorous.

Although I wouldn't regard Metallica's career as being very controversial, they have explored other musical areas, like their collaborations with Ja Rule and Lou Reed, performing with the San Francisco symphony orchestra, performing accoustic sets.

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[quote name='megallica' timestamp='1400001187' post='2449795']
I wouldn't comment on a genre of music I knew nothing about. I would definately not make negative sweeping generalisations about the fans of this genre. I find most of your post offensive but I'm assuming it was intended to be humorous.

Although I wouldn't regard Metallica's career as being very controversial, they have explored other musical areas, like their collaborations with Ja Rule and Lou Reed, performing with the San Francisco symphony orchestra, performing accoustic sets.
[/quote]

You are quite right that my comments are intended to amuse rather than offend, and indeed to draw a contrary response from Metallica's loyal fans. There are many. :)

However, you are well wide of the mark when you say that this is genre of music that I don't know anything about. I know plenty about it. I grew up listening to it, albeit in an era before Metallica were a well-known established act. What's more, without wishing to give too much away, I know far more about Metallica than you give me credit for. Suffice to say, our paths have crossed over the years, and I am well aware of their career trajectory.

Metallica are not a controversial band quite simply because they don't do anything remotely controversial , for whatever reason that might be. What interests me and what I thought might interest other people to consider is that, in the absence of controversy, their fans feel a need to create it in their imagination by over-analyzing them and being hyper-critical . Metallica themselves cannot be held responsible for that , but nevertheless it is one indication of the [i]milieu[/i] they operate within. There is something faintly ridiculous about the kind of schisms that exist between Metallica fans over what was their best era and best music when taken as a whole, to the uninitiated most of their music from whatever era sounds like the same old ear -splitting heavy metal-by-numbers.

Edited by Dingus
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Just let me clarify:

Metallica at Glastonbury. If you like Metallica or you like Glastonbury , it will be great. If you like Metallica [i]and[/i] you like Glastonbury then you will be so happy that you can hardly chew your tofu burger. They will put on a great show. It's what they excel at.

Big corporate rock group plays big corporate rock festival. There really isn't a news story here.

Edited by Dingus
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I wouldn't have responded but I get a bit fed up by the whole "metal fans are thick as two short planks" stereotype, for me it's right up there with the "bassists are failed guitarists" stereotype.

The funniest threads on the Metallica forum are the cliff burton vs jason newsted ones, those guys really are passionate about that topic :rolleyes:

[quote name='Dingus' timestamp='1400002673' post='2449818']
You are quite right that my comments are intended to amuse rather than offend, and indeed to draw a contrary response from Metallica's loyal fans. There are many. :)

However, you are well wide of the mark when you say that this is genre of music that I don't know anything about. I know plenty about it. I grew up listening to it, albeit in an era before Metallica were a well-known established act. What's more, without wishing to give too much away, I know far more about Metallica than you give me credit for. Suffice to say, our paths have crossed over the years, and I am well aware of their career trajectory.

Metallica are not a controversial band quite simply because they don't do anything remotely controversial , for whatever reason that might be. What interests me and what I thought might interest other people to consider is that, in the absence of controversy, their fans feel a need to create it in their imagination by over-analyzing them and being hyper-critical . Metallica themselves cannot be held responsible for that , but nevertheless it is one indication of the [i]milieu[/i] they operate within. There is something faintly ridiculous about the kind of schisms that exist between Metallica fans over what was their best era and best music when taken as a whole, to the uninitiated most of their music from whatever era sounds like the same old ear -splitting heavy metal-by-numbers.
[/quote]

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[quote name='megallica' timestamp='1400007950' post='2449899']
I wouldn't have responded but I get a bit fed up by the whole "metal fans are thick as two short planks" stereotype, for me it's right up there with the "bassists are failed guitarists" stereotype.[/quote]

There is of course the view that metal musicians are similarly intellectually challenged, yet I think the guys from Metallica have stewarded their brand brilliantly and ruthlessly over the years, which has reflected the fact that they are far from the meat heads many believe them to be. It hasn't always made them popular, although very interesting to note how many people are reassessing their views on the Napster situation, now we inhabit a world where - according to some sources, you need over 4 million plays of a track on Spotify to make US minimum wage. Excellent article here for those who are interested : [url="http://flavorwire.com/407971/does-spotify-prove-that-lars-ulrich-was-right-all-along"]http://flavorwire.co...right-all-along[/url]

Metallica are in the process of , (or have, depending on your view), crossing over into the heritage club of bands like the Rolling Stones : they will continue to tour every so often, banging out Enter Sandman and Seek and Destroy, in the same way the Stones roll out Brown Sugar and Satisfaction.

What was once edgy and dangerous is now seen as establishment and national treasure status : Mick and his MCC membership seems a long way from the threat to the nations youth he supposedly posed in the 60s, and Metallica are the comfortable face of metal for many : Lars and his art collecting, Kirk's surfing and James' sobriety, and as has been said - a perfect fit for Glastonbury's middle class, middle England version of cool and frisson of rebellion right on-ness.

I bet they are great : its what they do, and they'll stick to the hits from the Black Album, so it doesn't scare the non fans too much, although I believe Brian Ferry is on at the same time on one of the other stages, so that's an option.

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Me and the Mrs are off to Glastonbury at the ripe old age of ahem 50 something. She went years ago and has never stopped going on about it, so thought I'd go and see what all the fuss was about. I pride myself on having an eclectic taste in music but drew the line at metal some years ago. When I saw the Metallica announcement I kind of groaned as I'd been hoping for someone I was really into, anyways as part of my homework just this morning I downloaded a copy of the black album and played on the way into work - hell I like it! I am definately going to check them out, unless of course it clashes with Pixies or Black Keys

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[quote name='megallica' timestamp='1400007950' post='2449899']
I wouldn't have responded but I get a bit fed up by the whole "metal fans are thick as two short planks" stereotype, for me it's right up there with the "bassists are failed guitarists" stereotype.

The funniest threads on the Metallica forum are the cliff burton vs jason newsted ones, those guys really are passionate about that topic :rolleyes:
[/quote]

If I think about it , Metallica fans can't be that thick, not least of all because you need at least an A and two B's at A Level to do electronic engineering at most universities nowadays.

In America though, the audience at Metallica ( and other bands of their ilk) concerts consists to a very large degree of the kind of people who you would see on a Jerry Springer show talking about having an affair with their first cousin just after they had got out of jail for committing an unspeakable indiscretion with the family dog. Not unlike quite a few Bassschat members in that respect, I suppose.

And Jason Newsted is loads better than Cliff Burton. No contest. He is also a very nice guy.

Edited by Dingus
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I would love to tell you some of my Glastonbury anecdotes, but it would undoubtedly lead to me getting banned from Basschat, and I would have no right to complain. Suffice to say I will not be going this year or any other year.

Apropos of all this, some spontaneous footage from the Dutch equivalent of Glastonbury:

[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u6f9TyXNs6w[/media]

What is it with Dutch people and toilets?

Anyhow, I just hope the poor fella wasn't doing the catering.

Edited by Dingus
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[quote name='Dingus' timestamp='1400088470' post='2450664']
I would love to tell you some of my Glastonbury anecdotes, but it would undoubtedly lead to me getting banned from Basschat, and I would have no right to complain. Suffice to say I will not be going this year or any other year.

Apropos of all this, some spontaneous footage from the Dutch equivalent of Glastonbury:

[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u6f9TyXNs6w[/media]

What is it with Dutch people and toilets?

Anyhow, I just hope the poor fella wasn't doing the catering.
[/quote]

Too funny! I saw way worse stuff than this last year in the Glastonbury toilets.

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[quote name='Dingus' timestamp='1400087881' post='2450653']
If I think about it , Metallica fans can't be that thick, not least of all because you need at least an A and two B's at A Level to do electronic engineering at most universities nowadays.
[/quote]


Well that puts my academic struggles into perspective, thanks for that. Back to the self harming...ho hum...

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[quote name='ead' timestamp='1400138820' post='2451026']
Well that puts my academic struggles into perspective, thanks for that. Back to the self harming...ho hum...
[/quote]

Depending on where you want to go, you might be able to get on one of those courses with maybe a B and two C's , or through the clearing system if your A levels results have been a bit disappointing.

I hope that helps. :)

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[quote name='Dingus' timestamp='1400159970' post='2451306']
Depending on where you want to go, you might be able to get on one of those courses with maybe a B and two C's , or through the clearing system if your A levels results have been a bit disappointing.

I hope that helps. :)
[/quote]

My 'A' level results in 1978 were not too shabby and neither was my Electronics degree thanks.

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[quote name='ead' timestamp='1400193284' post='2451804']
My 'A' level results in 1978 were not too shabby and neither was my Electronics degree thanks.
[/quote]

I am delighted to hear that, my friend

What's more, .A levels were A levels back in those days, too,not like the Mickey Mouse exams they have nowadays where it seems like 98% of people get the required grades they need to do Golf Course Management at Teesside University, and then wonder why their future isn't as bright as they had hoped for.

I wouldn't get worked up about this whole electrical engineering business. It's a great skill to have, especially nowadays when electricity is so popular. And if there was some calamitous power failure at a Metallica concert and the roadies asked if there was anyone in the audience who was qualified to give technical assistance to get the P.A and lights up and running again , their only problem would be the risk of being stampeded by the rush of highly knowledgeable men ready to tell them what schoolboy errors they had made in setting the rig up. :)

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[quote name='KevB' timestamp='1400247886' post='2452259']
Go on Dingus, admit it. You were one of those guys who auditioned after Newstead left. Did you make it onto the video? ;)
[/quote]

Same old problem with me and auditions for established , big-name acts . They just want a bass player , not another sex symbol in the band :( .

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